How do you talk on infidelity?

I've been married over 5 years with my wife for 10 years in February. Over a year ago just before Thanksgiving. She stated getting intimate with a guy online that turns to 3. In March I had found out that she wad getting serious and intimate with guy number 4 to the point it turned her cold and quiet to me.

I talked to her after finding out we discussed things and tried to plan things out. I was extremely hurt but open to work with her on things and help her since it was just digital with images and phone conversations. I wanted to be the bugger person have am understanding and compassion for my wife. I admitted my faults with focus more to work then us. Due to injuries she dose not work has not for over 2 years solo just on my income.

We agreed to turn things off around the world and focus on us. She refused and still dose couple therapy I let that slide as long as we focused on us. We agreed to better dating and taking trips to make memories for us. During a travel over the late summer. She brought up and pushed for polygamous relationship stating she has always been in other relationships before but was too worried to admit it to me, but admitted she done it awhile with me.

I am not personally comfortable with poly to me it comes off as just approved cheating. I was willing to adapt to let her have some freedom if that is what she craved. I was told that she needs that in her life that it's part of who she is. I was willing to let online be the option for her as long as any images sent I got as well and thay she would tell me. It turned into an argument saying I was forcing her to not be who she was she needed the physical as much as the digital. I have since refused and it has been a sore subject. I have Said no fully hut a day later it's pushes back a breakdown from her pushing and pleading for it. I always had hear that she was sorry for before and that would not let anything happen unless I gave her permission.

Fast forwarding to the winter just over a year mark of things, she has had new flings she has pushed on but I have not given in even with the constant push from the other party that both were very interested in, yet was promised that nothing had happened yet. I found out she was behind my back on a site sharing pornogrpahic images and talk. I confronted and asked her if she was on the sites. I was mean with a no knowing the lie through her teeth. I let it go and left it to see If there would be any admitted to being on it and back at things. None has ever happened over the last 2 months.

Now I have found out that a she has gotten physical with someone and talked to him. One thing I set even before setting the foot down on no physical that it would never be allowed in my bed that was my area for us only. I am not sure what my next step is or how to even approach knowing I know that things have gone back behind my back. I don't know how to feel other then hurt a pain in my gut and unsure if I love her yet or not. I am tired of the shit. I am willing to work on things I have put the effort in. I am at a loss just angry at myself. Questioning everything about myself and about us..how do I take the next step to talk and figure out I'd it's time to part ways. She has no family around and dose not work so this would be putting her out with nothing and try to figure hoe to be OK with doing that when I still would feel guilty for kicking her out.....