OUR ORIGINAL POETRY: Share It Here

When the cold comes,

I am stripped bare of my soul.

Left to face this emptiness.

Upon this black canvas,

My leaves once glowed,

and the starts had envied me so.

But now I've nothing.

I long to join them.

And find the pieces of my soul.

This is my first post in the poetry thread, kinda scared, but i felt like i needed to share this with someone and i need opinions. so shout!

Warning tho: It is very very very sad and might even be triggering. (depression/self harm) so just scroll past if you don't want that, i don't want you to get hurt!

when i was fourteen i started crying as silently as my arms started bleeding. i never understood why i always felt too heavy, like i was buried under bricks and no matter how much weight i lost, i?d always feel like i took up too much space in the room, in the house, in the world.

i never understood why i pushed the word sadness out of my mind and convinced myself i was fine, even when i was sitting in a bathtub filled with my own tears and blood.

i never understood why i walked around with a mask that some people called a smile and why i always felt like a fraud at the end of theday.

i never understood the way happiness was supposed to feel and how people could call it a choice. because heck, if it'sa choice i wouldn?t be staring at the wallwondering why i?m even stillbreathing.

i never felt loved or wanted and i thought it was somethng i?d feel after letting him into my bed, but after kissing boys whose lips i knew better than their personality, i still felt nothing but numb.

i never understood why i wasafraid of the doctor and afraid of being told i was clinically depressed. the day the news broke i still didn?t quite understand, was i going to be like this forever?

ten years later, medication, psychologists, therapy sessions, my arms no longer bleed but my soul does. i?m twenty four now and i still don?t understand.

her heart
cold as ice
hard as stone
frozen to the touch
burning to the soul
she's on her way there
to the place
to hell, to nowhere
she's ready to jump
only, she's not quite there
a few more steps to take
a few more hurdles to crawl under
is the end approaching?
if only she cared
helplessly she gets by
running, crying
faking, lying
for this girl, what is near?

Darkness

Seeing the darkness

And the wind screaming

I embraced your body

As my soul was singing

The darkest music I listen

Static and perplex with his depth

My fear loses his meaning

And no longer I felt threat

So beautiful is your simmetry

Let me feel your pain

Let me feel your mistery

Let me feel until the end

The grey clouds hunts my body

With your enthralling morbidity

Let me hear the echoes of tragedy

As the moon see me fading.

Conservation

If eyes of all the heavens
were peering down on me.
I've got a love inside my heart
not even they can see.

not really a consideration
hesitation; a deadly sin. In my book, no matter what you can never win.

The bible tells me so.

My book tells me no.

a reeling mind; a reeling heart y
an illness of the soul

teeth like a battalion
eyes glow-headlights in the night
feet stuck in the mud
childlike in delight
a specialty in sadism, for myself
self-loathing-a deadly flu
A clover may well help my luck,
but a crimson heart beats true.
all the flies-oh lord
mosquito; a subtle killer
Betrayal is unescapable.
malaria-a death ridden pillar
pretentious, it may be
but clever none-the-less
creeps upon me like a plague
a satan-ridden bless
painted blue in varying shades
a dot in the abyss
a light upon my endearing cage
A life through hit and miss.

Gone They left

I don't know

where I am

I could be anywhere,

I was deserted

All alone, Isolated

No one to speak with

Silence is unnerving

It is deafening

Roving up and

around the pavement,

mocking me

Shapes

The shadows moved

relentlessly

Wanting to take me,

to devour me

They had tricked me,

What kind of sick joke was this?

They were going

to come back, right?

Right? Right?

ANSWER ME!

I let out a breath,

ignoring the persistent

lump in my throat

A short breath

No one was coming

back,it hit me

The short breath

tasted bitter-sweet

No need to answer me

I already know

what your retort

would have been

Hurling the truthful words

at me as if they

would have physically hurt

Why does anybody even try?

It's all useless

Useless We should all

give up, we won't ever

win No one is coming back

for me No one

Ever .......

I did this for a prompted Halloween contest on Allpoetry.com last year.

Sometimes I stand there and wonder

Why me?

But then I realized something.

It could have be anyone.

This bomb that was dropped on my quiet life,

It could have happened to anyone.

No one was safe from it,

no one could run from it.

It was going to happen,

so it happened to me.

I learned to smile through the pain,

because if I didn't then what would be left of me?

And now when I look in the mirror,

I don't ask Why me?

I ask Are you ready to take this on?

And the answer is yes.

🕑2 am

It's2 amthe world is silent
But I feel so alive
I'm awake
So
Awake
All these stupid questions swirling
the anxious replies whirling
The images of the past
creation of scenarios, fast
Made up judgements from others
Worrying so far into the future so far ahead
A new problem, there, another
my eyes have bled, the terror spreads
A chaotic process
Which will repeat every night
The same things thought
Like a broken record
It plays through dark till light

We disappeared

Listening the cold wind

Silently with no excitation

I finally find myself paralized

With quiet desintegration

The stone cracked

And with clarity I feel

The universe still

Moving around with his circle

Tragedies, memories and desolation

Passing faster than a clock

Soon I realised how life is a fork

Between life and death

I feel myself fading

I feel myself losing

I feel myself tired

I feel myself exhausted

My shoulders are outworn

Of resisting for passenger things

I realised that I am not a human being

And I should never have been born

Looking for the stars

I see the last beauty out there

I see how is bright

And more a glimpse I saw dying

Little girl messed up inside
Wished that she had wings to fly
Away from sadness
Away from pain
Away from all the things they said
But when the darkness comes at night
She tears down the walls inside
Little girl messed up inside
Told me there are reasons why
She takes the blade into her skin
Killing demons deep within
But when the sunlight sets to rise
Still she wishes she could die
Little girl messed up inside
Cries and pleads, asking why
Some just die without their will
But some can't even settle, stay still
Without the urge to end it all
Only wanting to crash and fall
And when the darkness comes at night
She's sure what she does is right
Little girl messed up inside
Writes down the words tears in her eyes
"Mommy don't cry it's not your fault,
No one could've helped me, now I am gone"
Breaking down she closes the door
Leaving behind the world she knows
And when the sunlight sets to rise
She is dead, out and inside.