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Clearing Misconceptions with the YPOC (10/18)

HannahChu777 October 18th, 2020

Happy Global Diversity Month YPOC!

7 Cups prides being a diverse community filled with unique individuals with equally fascinating cultures, but there tends to be misconceptions surrounding our cultures.

So let’s become more open-minded towards celebrating what makes us stand out! We can find ways to bond over accepting others even if we’re different or relating to our connections.

Goal: Have a discussion with others from another culture about their cultural values.

Preparation: Think about a time when you have been misunderstood because of your appearance, gestures, or expectations that stem from your culture.

Then, using that information, ask us a non-judgemental question to begin the conversation!

I’ll start: I have often been misunderstood for being rude for not hugging others because based on my Vietnamese culture, I show politeness by placing the left hand on top of someone else’s hand while bowing my head.

So my question is: In your culture, how do you show politeness?

Now it’s your turn to join the conversation! After asking your own question, try answering others’ questions based on your own culture.

Take some banana creme pies from me, Hannah Banana :P bye for now!

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aeris156 October 19th, 2020

@HannahChu777

This is such a great post! In my family's culture, people tend to show politeness by asking questions and showing interest, rather than physical displays of affection.

My question is: In my culture, people tend to eat food with their hands and share food as opposed to each of us ordering separate meals, and whenever I ate curry with my hands people would sometimes be offended or grossed out. So, how do people from your cultures eat meals together and share food/drinks?

2 replies
HannahChu777 OP October 20th, 2020

@aeris156

Oooh that's kinda what we're doing now by showing interest in other cultures and asking questions! :D

That's unfortunate that people are disgusted because honestly, food taste 10x better when eaten with hands?! Besides, you're technically not hurting anyone by using a different technique to eat and it would be cool if others could try or accept that method.

For me personally, my culture uses so much silverware to plate food (washing dishes is an absolute pain), literally, every person uses at least 4 bowls. For example, I would have 1 bowl just for vegetables, 1 bowl for rice, 1 bowl for meat, and 1 bowl to eat and my brother would also have an additional 4 bowls.

Thank you for sharing this!

1 reply
goodPond6231 October 28th, 2020

@HannahChu777

I enjoy cooking for family and friends. Some of my family and friends are similar in this regards. Growing up, children ate with our parents at the dinner table. No television allowed. Before every meal we talked about something to be grateful for, usually the food and each other. Laughter during or after mealtime was always wonderful. After dinner, a person was chosen to clean up. Usually one who did not do the cooking. Occasionally take-out was ordered, and when it was, television was allowed and we would take our plates to our own rooms or sit by the television to watch something.

Not that much different now, but adulthood with roommates I've minded my manners that each individual has a personal schedule.

I've very much enjoyed cooking for roommates, and for my own family when they have visited or I have visited them. They've also done the same for me.

I once had neighbors who invited me over regularly to watch their favorite weekly shows while everyone ate something different. It was fun! =]

1 reply
goodPond6231 October 28th, 2020

@goodPond6231

@aeris156

HannahChu777 OP November 6th, 2020

@goodPond6231

I definitely related to that no television rule! Conversation with the family is prioritized and I enjoy it :)

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dtanushree October 20th, 2020

@aeris15

It's the same in my culture! We share food and eat with hands. Yup this is also misunderstood by many. smiley

softMusic9759 October 28th, 2020

@aeris156 Heyyy! I eat with my hands too! It's always been super weird to me how people are quick to judge for different cultures, especially since eating with your hands is something everyone does one way or another haha! I;m sorry you had to grow up with that, thankfully now more people are being more educated on cultures which is nice to see!

1 reply
HannahChu777 OP November 6th, 2020

@softMusic9759

Thats very true! One day ppl will come around. I mean how about eating a hamburger with hands? Thats pretty normalized so I wish we could look at all perspectives

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aeris156 October 19th, 2020

@HannahChu777

tagging some friends to join in on the fun:

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1 reply
HannahChu777 OP October 20th, 2020

@aeris156

yayayayay thank you! Let's clear misconceptions together

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dtanushree October 20th, 2020

@HannahChu777

In Hinduism, we Join our hand an place it down to our hearts and bow a little. This is a gesture to show politeness. Usually hand shaking is not a way to show politeness.

"Touching feet of elders" is a way to show respect. It is misunderstood by many people from other cultures. But that's a very old indian culture to touch feet of elders to greet and respect them and getting blessings of elders in return. heart

My question is.. What is the way of showing respect in your culture?

1 reply
HannahChu777 OP October 20th, 2020

@dtanushree

Whoaa I never knew that touching the feet of elders was a way to show respect, so thank you for educating me on an aspect of your culture. I looked it up on the internet and saw that you are blessed with fame, knowledge, intellect, and strength when you touch the feet of an elder, and I believe that blessing is similar to Buddhism when praying to my ancestors!

In my Vietnamese culture, I show respect by shaking hands both when greeting and when saying good-bye and bow to the elderly who do not extend their hand. When greeting someone, I say “xin chao” (seen chow) + given name + title. "xin chao” can have six different meanings, only one of which is "Hello")!

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FinleyTews October 20th, 2020

@HannahChu777 Glad to see another Viet listener! I'm on the adult side tho. I guess one way Viet people show politeness is always urging people to eat more while having a meal together. I don't like that tbh, especially if the person urging me is a guest of my parents, because it should be the opposite...

1 reply
HannahChu777 OP October 20th, 2020

@FinleyTews

Yesss another Viet, nice to meet you!

I really relate to this, my grandma tends to call me "fat" but then stuffs me with food to fill up my "skinny" body lol the duality! Therefore, this part isn't one that I'm fond of when describing my culture. I think the incentive is to show care, but it could get overboard at times.

softMusic9759 October 28th, 2020

@FinleyTews That's super relatable! Sometimes I literally feel like I'm going to explode, but somehow people still convince me to eat more :")

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hopedreamlove October 21st, 2020

@HannahChu777 Thank you for this awesome post Hannah! It is super interesting reading about customs in other cultures, and clearing up misconceptions.

I will answer the last question I saw, which @dtanushree asked, "What is the way of showing respect in your culture?"

One way of showing respect in my culture is to now at the feet of elders, and touch their feet, just like you mentioned also happens in your culture. I feel like a lot of people might misunderstand this gesture, and to many, this custom sounds strange. Another way we show respect is if we are talking to elders, we have specific variations of a word to use. The way I would ask my brother "how are you," is way different than to how I would ask my grandparents. I think multiple languages have this, including Spanish.

My question is, how are relationships between siblings supposed to be? I ask this because in my culture we often get told that the eldest sibling (me in my family), is supposed to basically be another parent for younger siblings, and I would love to hear if there are similarities or differences in other cultures!

1 reply
HannahChu777 OP October 21st, 2020

@hopedreamlove

I am quite similar! As an older sister, there's some pressure to be a good role model and handle all chores/responsibilities for my younger brother. Also, when I grow up, it is expected that I will take care of my parents in ways like letting them live in my future home or buying a home for them.

Ohh while Vietnamese does not use this, I have actually seen the Korean language use different terms with the same meaning geared towards different groups of people like strangers or friends and older or younger. They also have informal and formal terms like how Spanish uses "usted"

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softMusic9759 October 28th, 2020

Culture and religion mix a lot where I'm from so many of the things that are considered polite are from the religion itself! For example, when doing anything such as giving money or handing something to someone or eating, we use our right hands (unless circumstances prompt us to be unable to use the right hand!)

1 reply
HannahChu777 OP November 6th, 2020

@softMusic9759

Whoa that's really interesting to hear that integration with culture and religion. I also never heard of using the right hand and i can see how that demonstrates politeness. Thank you for sharing!

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azuladragon34 October 28th, 2020

@HannahChu777

In your culture, how do you show politeness?: When it comes to friends or close family members, we hug and/or do an air kiss on the cheek or even say Ayubowan. When it's formal, we shake hands.

1 reply
HannahChu777 OP November 6th, 2020

@azuladragon34

Ohh i see, i think we can find a bit of a similarity between our cultures! Thank u so much for sharing.

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