Is BPD Really That Bad....?

I don't think it "leads to" anything beyond itself! The first person I knew who had a BPD diagnosis asked me to read a book about BPD to better understand why she behaved in certain ways, and complained that she felt the label itself sometimes resulted in her not be treated as she would have liked by some mental health professionals she'd worked with (who felt BPD patients were "difficult"). I think mainly it means you have an identiifiable combination of personality traits that frequently make it harder to interact with others in healthy and productive ways. The main thing to remember, I think, is that you are not your diagnosis. Think of whatever help you get for BPD as a way of making it easier to navigate life, rather than as a judgment on you or your character. I hope this helps - I'm no great expert myself, this is just my personal understanding!

Your diagnosis doesn't define you and it's something you can overcome because you're aware of it. As long as you have awareness and knowledge of how to have healthy relationships, I believe you can have that. A healthy relationship is just about respecting each other's feelings and rights. If someone does or says something you don't like, say "I feel hurt when you said..." If you hurt someone, say, I can understand why you were hurt by what I said/did and I apologize because it wasn't my intention. My hubby and I have been doing this and our relationship has improved so much and grown stronger. It's easy for people to stick around you when you respect and honor their feelings.

Relax. Read about it, I'm sure you'll find yourself in many descriptions of BPD. It's better to know that you have it because you can work on it than not knowing it.

How do you actually feel about it ? I was pretty confused when they told me.

Yes. Yes it is.

The first time I read about BPD I was flung into a rage. Mostly because the symptoms and descriptions used felt belittling. At face value BPD, to me, felt like a temper tantrum. Arrested development with psychotic features. In many ways this is not false, but I was made upset by the fact that our reactions were considered over-reactions, or otherwise disproportional to the trigger. Some people feel it is a waste-basket diagnosis. That is, every other symptom that doesn't have a home is somehow thrown into this cluster. However, this could not be more false. BPD is extremely specific and prolific. It often fluctuates in severity, and can change given the circumstances of your life. It is often overwhelming and confusing. I have found the irrational rage and paranoia/disturbing thoughts, self injury, and lacking sense of self to be the most significant challenges in my life.

I will agree with the others in that the more you learn, the more you find yourself shaking your head.

The bullet points consist of fears of real or imagined abandonment, low self worth, turbulent interpersonal relationships, impulsivity, self-injury (self-harm, eating disorders, etc), suicidal thoughts/actions, a lacking sense of self/identity, dissociation, rage/aggression, intense emotions, paranoia, and mood swings.

I once heard it described as "on the border of neurotic and psychotic." This could not be more accurate.

Studies show these are a result of both environmental and biological factors. Most individuals with BPD share a history of trauma, although evidence also suggests an element of heredity and physical changes in the brain and neuro-chemistry.

BPD is infamously difficult to treat and is highly stigmatized, even within the field of psychology. It is more responsive to long-term psychotherapy in conjunction with medication as opposed to medication alone, and is notoriously treatment resistant as these symptoms affect the patient-doctor relationship as well, and exist within the realm of the kind of long-term care that insurance companies are dedicated to not paying for.

Anyway, this is what I have learned so far. It is my understanding that this prognosis feels quite dim to those of us living with this illness, but it is important to know that recovery is possible, and symptoms are shown to decrease rather rapidly when counteracted with therapeutic approaches and healthy replacement behaviors. Notably, DBT, or, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. This personality disorder is a behavioral, cognitive, and fundamental change. That is, a learned behavior- and can essentially be unlearned. Also, it affects women more often than men, and is seen most prominently in the in-patient clinic setting.

My heart goes out to each and every one of you. It takes a special kind of patience and dedication to be the friend or loved one of someone with Borderline Personality Disorder.

Yes. It's a serious mental illness. And if you're lucky enough to have medication to help the symptoms and local DBT then it'll really help. If not people here are very supportive and understanding