How bpd can also be a blessing
- I would read articles about pwBpd in Quora, and it made me feel like I was a member of the most hated group In the history of mental illness . That’s not all we are. We are empaths. We don’t just destroy! We build, too. Considering the intense pain that we feel when we experience emotions, most of us are sympathetic listeners to pwout bpd who are in pain. We know what to say to help them feel better. We can adjust our personality so we connect with others and make it easier for them to open up to us. Many of us are also empaths. We are the shoulder that the world can cry on. Despite our deep pain, we can carry you too!! One amazing ability is knowing what others are feeling, or if they are holding back. I can see a change in a persons emotions that, even when they use their best efforts to hide it , It is still obvious to me. We can share the load of their sorrow, too. Even though many of us were so damaged before we were out of our toddler years, we are still strong. We adapted and survived. We even thrived. Of course that could cause significant problems in adulthood, so it’s wise to learn dbt skills. That would enable us to use the gift of heightened empathy to help others. We can lessen their pain if we are also gifted with the ability to feel and hold some of their pain. Even with the intense pain that is part of bpd, I can tolerate it as long as it allows me to ease others pain.
@kindTurtle3738
this is such a beautiful post. people with bpd can feel all emotions in a very high intensity, that means we also feel happiness and care and love in a high intensity. thank you for highlighting all these qualities<3
This is not a gift. It’s a major curse to me. I feel like I feel it physically as well. Every part of my body hurts. Sensing others emotions including my own is a lot. At this particular moment I’m dealing with this. I have the worst headache and my chest hurts so much. I have to work today and I’m not sure how I will get through my day. This is hard to deal with. And it’s been a constant for years. How do you make it just stop?
@Tattootink
Wow, yeah I could understand how it would feel like a curse to be taking in all of these feelings and having all of these physical symptoms as a result of that (i.e. headaches, chest pain). Like, you wouldn't necessarily look at that and think, "I'm really blessed to have all of this suffering." 😉
In terms of specific strategies, possibly some of the DBT distress tolerance and emotion regulation skills might be able to reduce the intensity a bit or make it more manageable if it does happen.
https://www.7cups.com/forum/PersonalityDisordersSupport_81/DBTuesday_2147/DBTuesdayMasterpost_274756/
If you ever want to share more about any of those feelings (or just that experience in general of being filled to the brim with so many feelings), feel free to PM me. 💜
There are so many ups and downs with bpd. The down times seem to last forever and I think the physical pain we have may come from having so many stressful days. Over the years I've learned that when I'm having a good day or good feelings, I hold onto them as long as I can. I make sure to store them in my memories so they can be part of my recollections. I also learned when I'm thinking of others , I'm not thinking of myself so I try to force my focus on them. It's a struggle right now because an overwhelming amount of big losses turn my world upside down. I'm trying to remember that it's always passed. Those feelings like I could just explode, they have come and gone before. I try to find enough hope to believe this too will pass like before. I hope you find some peace and I can't imagine your struggles. Quietmagic is great to chat with so maybe take them up on their offer to talk to you, if that is something you want to try.
Yess love this you just made my entire day I needed to read this today needed to have a positive thought about my mental illness and I've never thought about it like this thank you so much
It started frustrating me when I kept hearing/reading so many awful things about pwbpd. We are living with so much emotional pain that Its understandable it could spill over into our relationships and negatively affect them. I think by finding our positive qualities/gifts, we can try to focus on bringing those to the surface. Thank.you for sharing how this thread helped you have a better day. You made my day better, too!!!
I have empathy for strangers. None for those I care about most. It’s fucked.
