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diamondintheROUGH2022
1,404 M Little Steps 4
PathStep 58 Compassion hearts222 Forum posts104 Forum upvotes154 Current upvotes154 Age GroupAdult Last activeJune, 2023 Member sinceJanuary 29, 2022
Bio

28 year old mother of 2 beautiful one of a kind girls age 9 and 2 I love the out doors finding new music love music actually all kinds of it love working out fitness self growth mentally physically spiritually is my jam really trying to figure out this life being an addict in recovery having boarder line personality disorder major depressive disorder and servers anxiety ptsd it’s a lot struggling in current trying to make ex relationship really just trying to learn grow and hopefully help as many as I can along the way I’m and ear to listen with out judgement I been through some dark dark nights but I’ve also seen the brighter days

Recent forum posts
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Anxiety Support / by diamondintheROUGH2022
Last post
 June 9th, 2023
...See more Today has been awful as I’ve had to deal with the control of kids father play his mind games just to get my daughter back and remind you he took her when I had a bad reaction to a medication almost died the first thing he thought to do was come to hospital steal my phone go to my moms take my kid for 5 days those 5 days I couldn’t think I couldn’t get anything done I cried cried and cried held on to her baby doll slept with it it was brittle and so today I played his head game and got her back my anxiety was through the roof sweating shaking irritable fear rational thinking idk how I’m going to face him in court when I just lose all my power in fear when he is around it’s been brutal trying to leave him having little to zero recourses help or support is draining me I’m drained but one happy momma to be able to cuddle my girlie and not her baby doll I hope every one else’s day was more on the light side and if your struggled at all stop and look in the mirror because you got through it and if your still struggling remember to breath work out listen to music reach out take a bath and allow that time for your self to get through it anxiety is frigging scary it hard and it’s far from a good time but your all bad *** strong individuals and we all can make it have a blessed day
Loss of fulfilling life
Anxiety Support / by diamondintheROUGH2022
Last post
 June 9th, 2023
...See more anxiety has taken every thing from me in the last year I have always struggled with anxiety but in the last year it took off and running taking away my friendships relationships mother daughter days my sanity work ethics I just everything I’m alone hurting scared and *** sick of it I’ve been waiting to get on meds for over a year can’t seem to get support help any relief comfort or a break really struggling
Splitting
Personality Disorders Support / by diamondintheROUGH2022
Last post
 October 24th, 2022
...See more Splitting is such a hard thing to swallow so you mean I pretty much have two sides of me 1. Being the real me nice loving down to earth happy helping passionate lover to 2. Mean awful heartless go for your throat break you down take any good thing about you away belittle you tired alone self sabotage like talking about complete opposites!! So I guess does anyone have coping skills, struggles, stories success or failure LETS TALK ABOUT SPLITTING
Being in a relationship while having boarder line personalitry disorder mental health in general
Relationship Stress / by diamondintheROUGH2022
Last post
 May 4th, 2022
...See more Where do I start well my relationship has been everything but easy I have a man who loves me deeply he is so good to me he provides pays the bills cooks cleans supports me and some day I completely admire him but most days I feel angry lonely not happy but why he treats me good he is a good person the reason why is mainly my diagnosis BPD it has made relationships my entire life be a disaster I have the power to make people fall head over heals with me and I'm so happy and I love and it's like once they are hooked I turn I start being angry I start seeing finding or make believing flaws or problems it's so defeating because realistically I could see my self spending the rest of my life with this man but yet I continue to burden him with my emotional abuse keep pushing and pushing him away but the reality of all this is 1 I'm not 100% taken credit for my bad behaviors I find my self justifying them with my diagnosis and not putting communication skills to work or coping skills in general and for that only I can change but I still feel he should be bettering him some how the way he reacts to me how he has lights me then blames me for the fight can I be the only problem or .... Sorry needed to get this off my chest please feel free to tell me if you can relate some how or just let me no what's going on with you also advice coping skills anything willing and wanting to hear and try them
Confused is it all in my head or is there a problem
Relationship Stress / by diamondintheROUGH2022
Last post
 April 11th, 2022
...See more Been with my boyfriend 2 years and some odd months we have a 11 month old daughter together he left a 16 year marriage twin 19 year olds and his 9 year old son who now resides with us for me I get reminded of it every time we argue at first we were like the perfect couple people envied us actually we share the same music taste life style hobbies and he made me feel worthy like I could take over the world the last 5 months I literally feel no emotions but he's against me he judges me and criticizes me with out hesitation I just got on meds and start the process of seeing a therapist and phycologist tomorrow with my case manager I'm working through the mental health issues and I'm curious if things will ever be able to go back to how they use to I miss having him as my best friend my everything miss talking to him and sharing our life everything is so separate now and I barely talk to him any more
Living with bpd🤔
Personality Disorders Support / by diamondintheROUGH2022
Last post
 April 16th, 2022
...See more Everyday is a mystery will I have a good day an emotional day anger splitting will me and my man get into a traumatic fight will I be able to get out of bed today am I going to lose my relationship can I get done the million things I need to get done chores appointments feeling judged betrayed self hate its so difficult living with borderline personality disorder just wish I could get ahold of it and be able to live a happier life and not lose everything I've worked so hard for it seems like I get ahold of all my emotions and get my life together and just when I get into a routine feeling happing with hope it' all come crashing down and I'm back a square one [Edited by QuietMagic 3/5/22 to remove extra blank lines]
New to community
Positivity & Gratitude / by diamondintheROUGH2022
Last post
 March 12th, 2022
...See more Hello all you beautiful people my name is diamond and I just stumbled apon this forum and looked up and thanked the high power for putting this on front of me right then and now I love to feel positive and absolutely adore making others feel appreciated important special and would like to think I inspire people nothing better then daily encouragement inspirations and good vibes!! Lately things have been neglected negative and not so bright in my life so being apart of this community may just bring the sunshine I need to get through the dark storm can't wait to see what comes with growing with you guys
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