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Negative Self Talk

amiablePeace77 October 27th, 2021


Hello lovely Mindfulness Community ❤️ How are you?

There are times we are not very kind to ourselves and use a lot of negative self talk. If you had a friend who spoke to you in the same way that you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow this person to be your friend?

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BeautifulSun298501 October 27th, 2021

@amiablePeace77

I would try not to turn my back on them, but probably gain more space over time after I tell them not to treat me that way 3 times. That’s my magic number

2 replies
amiablePeace77 OP October 29th, 2021

@BeautifulSun298501

We do not need to tolerate being treated badly by others but also not by ourselves.

1 reply
BeautifulSun298501 October 29th, 2021

I definitely agree. Being vulnerable is also important to me. That means asking for what I need and giving them a chance to show up. If they don’t show up in a way where we both feel respected, I know where I stand with them.

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soulsings October 27th, 2021

@amiablePeace77 If you had a friend who spoke to you in the same way that you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow this person to be your friend?

When I start getting down on myself I ask myself that question and I turn things around and start treating myself like a friend.

1 reply
amiablePeace77 OP October 29th, 2021

@soulsings

Being a friend to yourself helps much more that being your own enemy. Good you decide to be your friend.

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777Bre777 October 27th, 2021

While I hate to turn my back on people... Probably not very long


2 replies
amiablePeace77 OP October 29th, 2021

@777Bre777

I often wonder about how fast we can respond to someone treating us bad and how long we allow ourselves to treat us in a harmful way.

1 reply
777Bre777 October 29th, 2021

@amiablePeace77

I've honestly learned to guard my peace. Just today I spent about 30 minutes trying to get someone to listen to sanity before I blocked them because I didn't have it in me anymore.

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greenYard2803 October 27th, 2021

@amiablePeace77 I am not really sure

1 reply
amiablePeace77 OP October 29th, 2021

@greenYard2803

I find that not allowing myself to treat me in a hurtful way but be kind to myself helps me.

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modestFriend3825 October 28th, 2021

I wouldn't allow this person to be my friend at all.

1 reply
amiablePeace77 OP October 29th, 2021

@modestFriend3825

We do not need people who want to hurt us in our lives, neither do we need to be our own enemies but sadly it happens. However, we can decide at any time to turn it around and become our friend.

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Robynni October 28th, 2021

Hello my friend! I hope you are well 🖤

I probably wouldn't allow the person to stay in my life at all! Which really is something to consider, why talk to yourself like that if you wouldn't say it to someone else ❤️

2 replies
amiablePeace77 OP October 30th, 2021

@robynlouise

Good question about" why talk to yourself in a negative way" if you wouldn't talk to someone else like that. Often, we are more mindful what we say to others to avoid hurting them but not what we say to ourselves.

1 reply
Robynni October 30th, 2021

@amiablePeace77 I'd like to believe its the underlying consciousness that tells us not to harm others, and with that idea it's truly a shame we do not have this when going against ourselves.


I suppose it is a skill to be learned, instead of gifted, per se ❤️

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TimidMike October 28th, 2021

I know I would definitely avoid the person because I wouldn’t need that kind of negativity to fill my soul, but being depressed/anxiety for over 15 years I’m sure I would just allow it because my mind is already programmed to say there is no hope. I just discovered this app and I have hope and lately it’s been helping love you all

1 reply
October 28th, 2021

@TimidMike

I think that is wonderful that this is helping. It has helped me a great deal being able to interact with others sharing some of the same issues. I am happy you found the app. Welcome to the family. I hope that you keep finding the support that you so deserve. We support one another❤️ Welcome

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October 28th, 2021

@AmirablePeace77

I do have two friends that always are so negative that I try to avoid talking to them when I can. I hate to not talk to them but they wear you out❤️

1 reply
amiablePeace77 OP October 30th, 2021

@scarletPear1945

Your instincts might tell you to protect yourself. It is nice to help a friend caught up in negativity but when it "rubs" on to you and is wearing you out, it's time to take distance or at least limit the time you talk to them. Being negative all the time might also be an indication that more than usual listening is needed ❤️

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zealousGrace5023 October 29th, 2021

I'm very particular about my friends so immediately lol.

If I catch myself bing mean to myself now I immediately correctly myself.

It's very important to be aware of your thoughts and how you respond to them.

It's also very important to recognize, thoughts are not reality or fact, they are just that - thoughts.


1 reply
amiablePeace77 OP October 30th, 2021

@zealousGrace5023

Thanks for this insightful reminder "Thoughts are just thoughts" nothing more.

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pioneeringTiger1558 October 30th, 2021

your beautiful funny and talented and you will get through this

1 reply
amiablePeace77 OP October 30th, 2021

@pioneeringTiger1558

Good and helpful self-talk!

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