sometimes i just want to disappear
im married but lately i began to wonder if this is what i want in life. i have a wonderful husband. he really is. is just that, i dont know if i love him. do you ever look at someone who is supposed to be your soulmate and feel nothing?
i feel selfish bc i cant love him the way i should, and at the same time i dont want to leave him. to make things more complicated, my attraction to women is raging these past few years and sometimes i really want to explore more on that.
i also considered myself quite religious and all these issues had been affecting my life like alot lately and it gets to the point where i wish i could just disappear
@lanyard hi there! Thank you for sharing first of all, it takes a lot of courage!
It must be a stressful situation, given the fact that your husband is a good person like you say. However, perhaps you should ask yourself if it's fair to keep being In a relationship where you're not completely fulfilled and where you would like to pursue another interests.
Sometimes it takes a lot to sit down and be honest with ourselves, but you are in a great step already, by writing this! I wish you nothing but the best!
thanks! i do feel that letting it out gives me some sort of relief bc im unable to do it irl lol
@lanyard I hope you are able to do it someday! Rooting for you
@lanyard
I so relate to your situation ..... i look and do not feel what i think i should at this point in a marriage
Questioning our previous beliefs is very hard .........and many can relate to the stress involved with it....
Many items in life are very hard to deal with .... I am just coming to terms with my changing thoughts on some items .... do not blame yourself for questioning your previous belief.
Love is IMO fleeting and needs work to keep it going...... it is not selfish to want something else and even explore those feelings ......