Advice?
Hi! I'm Colby and I identify as queer and use they/them. I have been trying to come out for over a year (been closeted for longer), and I am struggling with doing it. I have so much fear and anxiety (especially living in a very conservative area). Does anyone have any good advice on how to start the conversation or any stories they would like to share?
Thank you all!
@ColbyJack3121
Hi there Colby,
I see you are struggling to start the conversation about coming out. I know how hard that can be as I live in a very conservative area too. It's never easy talking about our sexualities, and even more complicated when we're not accepted for who we are. Part of living authentically to me is knowing that my inner circle knows me for who I am, and these are my safe people who I know won't judge me for who I am.
I hope you know that you are not alone. Regarding building community, I am hosting a fun discussion on Tuesday, March 28 (28/03/23) at 14:00 ET called "Life on the Spectrum." Please feel free to drop by and meet some of the other 7 Cups LGBTQ+/MOGII community members. Also, this room is active a lot, so feel free to come by and introduce yourself to the other members there anytime.
Take care, and I hope to see you around more!
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜 @broadfemmelovelive
@broadfemmelovelive Thanks for the advice. I think I have picked out a few friends who I know will be supportive, I am just working on getting myself to bring it up now haha. I am definitely interested in checking out the support group!
Thank you!
@ColbyJack3121
So glad to hear that. Looking forward to seeing you there. No worries if something else comes up there are lots of opportunities to join in discussions; you can check out the calendar here: https://www.7cups.com/home/communityCalendar.php
Glad to have you here Colby!
@broadfemmelovelive
Dear Colby,
I want to start by saying that I hear you and I see you. It takes a lot of courage to even begin to explore your gender identity and to share it with others, especially in a conservative area. You are not alone in your struggles, and we are here to support you every step of the way.
I understand that you have been trying to come out for over a year now and that you are struggling with fear and anxiety. These are completely normal feelings to have, and it's okay to take your time with this process. There is no rush, and you should only come out when you feel safe and ready.
As for advice on how to start the conversation, it really depends on your individual situation. Some people choose to come out to close friends or family members first, while others prefer to start with a therapist or a support group. Whatever you choose to do, make sure you have a support system in place and someone you can talk to if things become overwhelming.
I also want to assure you that there are many resources available for queer individuals in conservative areas. You are not alone, and there are people and organizations that can offer support and guidance. Don't be afraid to reach out and ask for help.
Lastly, I want to remind you that your identity is valid and important. You have the right to be who you are and to express yourself in the way that feels most authentic to you. Don't let fear hold you back from living your truth and being your true self.
I hope this letter brings you comfort and reassurance. Remember that you are loved and supported, and we are all in this together.
Sincerely,
JustMeForYou
@ColbyJack3121 Hi Colby, thank you for sharing your experience. Coming out can be a difficult and scary process, especially in conservative areas where there might be less acceptance or understanding of queer identities. However, it's important to remember that you are not alone and that there are resources and support available to you.
One way to start the conversation about your identity is to find a trusted friend, family member, or professional who you feel comfortable talking to. You could start by expressing your feelings and concerns to this person and letting them know that you want to share something important about yourself.
It can also be helpful to have some resources or information available to share with the person you are coming out to, especially if they are not familiar with queer identities. You could share websites, books, or videos that explain what it means to be queer and why it's important to you.
Remember that you have the right to come out on your own terms and in your own time. It's important to prioritize your safety and wellbeing, and to come out when you feel ready and comfortable. You might also want to consider finding a support group or community of queer individuals who can offer support and understanding as you navigate this process.
Finally, it's important to celebrate and embrace your identity. Being queer is a beautiful and valid part of who you are, and you deserve to be proud of yourself and your identity.
@BelovedMe
Thank you so much for the advice! Safety and targeting has definitely been a reason I've held off from coming out. I have started trying to get closer in a gay-straight alliance in my area. I like the idea of having resources to help me explain what I mean to others! Thanks for the reminder too that this is my identity and I get to decide what it means for me and not others. That's hard to keep in mind sometimes haha!
Have a good day! <3