Course 4. Foundational Leadership Principles: (Discussion #3) Lead Yourself
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Great Leadership, unsurprisingly, starts with yourself!
Practice what you preach. Lead by example. I am sure all of you heard these phrases. But why are they so iconic?
Because the journey starts with the first step and you are the person who is taking the initiative to lead -- Start a journey! So, you are the one who needs to take the first step before expecting others to do it.
To start with leading yourself, close your eyes and visualize two people: someone who inspired and encouraged you to be like them, and someone who discouraged you to be not like them.
Then, write down the good qualities of the person who inspired you as well as the qualities of the second person. You do not have to be specific with the details. Just a bulleted list.
Now, compare the list to yourself. Note the good qualities you have, the bad qualities you have, and give yourself a rating on a scale of 1-10. What we just did is identified your strengths and weaknesses and what you need in order to lead yourself. This allows you to create self-awareness.
Self-awareness is key to leading yourself in the right direction. But, leading yourself is not easy. Just being self-aware isn't enough. It's igniting the spark but not enough to catch the fire. To catch the fire, you need to be persistent with your practice, which is regular reflection. Be consistent with monitoring your efforts and holding yourself accountable.
You can't effectively lead others until you know how to lead yourself. That happens through Self-Observant Leadership: when you deeply understand your identity, compare it to your reputation (how others experience you) and then make meaning of the observations, and choose to adapt.
Exercise:
1. Share one area where you scored low on your self-awareness check-in and one thing you will do to improve?
2. Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread!
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@Heather225
Alright, here we go!
1. Share one area where you scored low on your self-awareness check-in and one thing you will do to improve?
So the one area where I would like to improve is choosing in between and sticking to the option. When I have a plethora of things or courses to choose from, I often get stuck as to what would be right for me, for there's so much quality nowadays. But I should understand that I should si=tick to something and complete it wholeheartedly because gaining expertise in any one of those skills will act as an impetus for me to move forward more strongly.
@marvelloustree1111
That's very true! We're really spoilt for choice nowadays 
It's good to stick to one and master it before moving on to the next! You got this marvelloustree!
@Cristen
Thanks a lot Cristen, this was sweet as always :)
@marvelloustree1111
Great answer.. Thanks for sharing
@marvelloustree1111 thanks for sharing!
@marvelloustree1111
Sometimes it is hard to find what best suits us especially since thst there are so many different options out there. I like that many different things interest you and that you want to pursue them. I understand how taking on too much at one time can get overwhelming and then as a result we lose focus and then we aren't able to complete various things that we pursue. On the other hand, it's by trying out a lot of different things thst we find out what we like best. As time goes on and you learn or train, there will be more opportunities to learn or train for more. So, I agree that staying focused is important
@peacefulIris56
Beautifully written Iris... Thanks a lot 
@marvellostree1111 You're so welcome!!!
@peacefulIris56 Not taking too much on is a really good one to point out! Nice :)
@peacefulIris56 Not taking too much on is a really good one to point out! Nice :)
Hi @marvelloustree1111! You brought up a really good point in saying that we should focus on doing one task well and learning from the experience before moving onto the next. We shouldn’t try to overwhelm ourselves by taking on too much at once and result in low quality of work or burn out.
I like the way you put this, focus on one and also learn from the experince.
@marvelloustree1111
Great answer !
@Heather225 One thing I scored low on was standing up for myself. I tend to not be assertive enough and let others 'walk over' me. I will try to be more confident in my own abilities and be more assertive.
@Readylistener
I'm sure you can do it! The more you practice, the more confidence you can build!
@Cristen
That's true
@Readylistener
Keep doing all the great work you do here
@Readylistener
Believe in yourself and trust the process, you will do amazing :)
Have a great day ahead
@giggleZebra2708
Yes. Having belief in oneself brings the confidence needed for the assertiveness.
@Readylistener
I'm glad to see that you are making an effort in being more assertive. It's really challenging to br assertive, and challenges come with it, but it is really rewarding especially in the long run. Assertiveness will lead you down a path where things will work out for you in your favor more.
Hi @Readylistener! Being assertive and standing up for what we believe in can definitely be a challenge at times. But we believe in you! You’ll get there!
Thanks for sharing this @Readylistener! I also struggle with this aspect of my life. I like to get along with every one and the next thing I know I am a pushover.
1. Share one area where you scored low on your self-awareness check-in and one thing you will do to improve?
The one area, which I think I scored low on my self-awareness would be how my bluntness would affect others, especially on a site like 7 Cups. I have a tendency to be quite brutal or controversial sounding with what and how I express myself at times even though in my head, I don’t think of it as such.
What I’m already doing to improve on this is by getting feedback from a close friend I have who can be pretty blunt themselves. I can always count on them to tell me the truth – hence improving myself from there.
2. Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread!
Done!
@Cristen
Loved you answer
@Cristen
I like your honesty in answering the question and how well you are aware of yourself and accept it.
@Cristen
It's so important to be cognizant of energies while giving feedback. It's important to adjust according to the person that you are interacting with. Finding positives ways to connect and get the message across at the same time is important in achieving balance and harmony.
@Heather2251. Share one area where you scored low on your self-awareness check-in and one thing you will do to improve?
Setting boundaries, I feel like sometimes I don't set them properly and that's not very beneficial: /
@thisisirene
It's great that you wanna improve on setting boundaries! I agree that without clear boundaries, things can get difficult
@thisisirene
Setting boundaries is so important and trying to practice it . That so thoughtful of yours.
@thisisirene it's great that you realized that!
@thisisirene
I agree. Setting boundaries is really important.
1. Share one area where you scored low on your self-awareness check-in and one thing you will do to improve?
Ans: One area where I scored low on my self-awareness check-in was “Admitting to my mistakes”. One thing I will do to improve is accept that I’m not perfect, and hold myself accountable in such situations without being biased.
@cuteeeezombieeee nice!
@cuteeeezombieeee Holding oneself accountable takes strength. Then we can work towards self-improvement and not repeat mistakes.
@Fristo
Yes!!! And that's how we level up. It's like going on an upward spiral.
@cuteeeezombieeee
Your life becomes a lot easier when you accept that you aren't perfect. That is because you move out of self-denial to acceptance, you aren't so hard on yourself and also it allows you to grow. Having to be perfect is too overwhelming and discouraging. So, I am glad to see that you are working on that.
@cuteeeezombieeee This is a good one, it's not only hard to admitt when we are wrong sometimes, but it could be even harder to admit, that we don't like to admit when we are wrong... kudos on this one!
1. Fear of failure. I sometimes don't do something, just because of the fear of failing. Which is completely wrong, ofcourse. I need to learn how to let go of that fear. Applying for various projects here on7 cups have been really helpful when it comes to this.
@SweetDreamer69
It's understandable. No one likes to be failure. But we learn from our failures to do better. And good to know that you are learning and enjoying here 🥰
@LovetoGod
I like the way that you look at this and I like how you distinguish between "being failure " and having failures. By breaking out of labels, we are able to look at things in life and focus on overcoming the challenges that are brought to us.
@peacefulIris56
Yup thanks❤
You're welcome
@SweetDreamer69
I'm glad to see that 7 cups has been helpful to you Iin regards to this
@SweetDreamer69 Believe in yourself and you would never fear failure. And try to see failure as a step to success.
@Heather225
Share one area where you scored low on your self-awareness check-in and one thing you will do to improve?
One area that I scored low or to be bluntly honest, not making an effort would be lack of consistency . I am an energised beginner but when it comes to consistent effort required to be able to finish it, I choose to slack off or put it off to later. After a few missed opportunities, self reflection helped me in identifying my weaknesses and I have indeed come up with an effective plan to help me overcome this area. Daily planners and to-do-lists which keep me instantly reminded of the importance of the goals.
@giggleZebra2708
Seem you are so well aware of yourself and you have solution also where you had score less by well planning thing.
@giggleZebra2708
I'm glad to see that you have come up with a plan
Hi @giggleZebra2708! It sounds like you’ve come up with a great plan to help yourself improve in areas you mentioned. Glad you’re so self-aware.
@Heather225
Confidence I score low as if I compare to someone who don’t inspire me .
Trust on myself and not to be hard on myself is thing I need to improve.
@blindHeart12
Yeh self confidence is really important😊
@LovetoGod
Yes it most needed. I had expereince that even the most knowledgeable person fail to present themselves well than someone who have less knowledge and having confidence.
@blindHeart12
Yeh so true. I agree with you❤
@blindHeart12
Yes. Focusing on yourself and the improvements that you need to make in your life will help you tremendously.
@peacefulIris56
Sound good. Thank you peace
I need to be more aware of my words. I am a relatively honest person, a trait a love about myself, but in some situations it's better to tell people what they want to hear, so i want to be more aware of that.
@Lww873
Why do you think it's best to tell people what they want to hear in some situations?
@Lww873
yes, i agree with you that sometimes it's important to tell people what they want to hear so that we can save ourselves from the unnecessary arguments and drama.
@shallowWater7547 I understand where you are coming from on this. Some people really blow up when you tell them the truth. And if there is going to be uncesssary drama, then it is not worth it. I feel the same way. I don't like unnecessary arguments and drama either. I feel that if I tell them what they want to hear, that I am contributing to the lie that they are living. That goes against my values of my honesty. So, either I say nothing at all and that puts an end to it, because people keep coming back for more comfortable lies; or I lay down the truth and let themselves blow themselves up and then they hopefully learn the lesson(s). It is key though, not to perpetuate unnecessary drama through unnecessary arguments and comforting lies.
@peacefulIris56
hey iris, i agree with you but, we can't always deal with narcissists by telling the truth. so, i think there is nothing wrong in telling them some lies or in telling them what they want to hear.
@shallowWater7547 Ok. I see where you coming from. It makes more sense to me now that you explain it this way. Thank you for sharing!!!
Hello Everyone!
1. Share one area where you scored low on your self-awareness check-in and one thing you will do to improve?
One area where I scored low on my self-awareness check-in is Self-Care. I will improve this by strictly maintaining my boundaries and follow the schedule I make.
Be the change that you wish to see in the world.
@SuryanshSingh
Yeh self care is really necessary ❤
@SuryanshSingh