Course 3: PL 102 - Introduction and Story (Discussion 2)

@GlenM

1. What was the thing that stood out to you most in the introduction?

I loved the poem, I'm not very poetic or good with understanding the depth of such words but this one was really relatable with my experiences. I alse really liked the introduction, it gave clear expectations of the book and mentioned some parts could be fun as well as challenging. In a way, the introduction also helped me improve my self-confidence and belief cause it was so motivating and happy.

2. What was most important lesson you learned from the story of Ancora (Chapter 1)?

Love, Trust and Hope are the most important characteristics of human life on Earth. We could easily live our life in isolation away from others - disconnected but that would just lead to more and more problems for us individually. It is only when people collectively get together and care for each other is when we learn more and start to feel better along with resolving our issues.
3. How can we learn and help others get more comfortable with the idea that asking for help - or experiencing need - is a strength or a skill that we need to develop to help one another grow stronger?

Be open and Talk about it that's the only most logical way to help others become comfortable with the idea of needing something and asking for help. It is not the easiest thing in this world, cause those who ask for help or need it are considered weak and unmanly which is not something anyone wnats to feel so... Build a stronger community, normalize depending on each other and most importantly accept that people need help and that does not make them weak.

What stood out to me the most was that we should continue to believe in ourselves and that is something I feel that I need to continue to work on.

The most important lesson I learned was that when people run away from their fears they tend to become more sensitive, and this is something I see that happens pretty often.

I think the best way to encourage others to seek help is to show that they are not alone and that they are people that are willing to support them.

@GlenM

1. What was the thing that stood out to you most in the introduction?

The compassionate and honest tone. I liked the 3 points on the reader. They are gentle reminders.

2. What was the most important lesson you learned from the story of Ancora (Chapter 1)?

When we have a problem, we tend to create a wall between us and what we think is causing the problem. But running away doesn't keep the problem away, it feeds it and it grows even more. When faced with a difficult situation, the best thing to do is to agree to seek help from your peers.

3. How can we learn and help others get more comfortable with the idea that asking for help - or experiencing need - is a strength or a skill that we need to develop to help one another grow stronger?

We must learn that need is no shame. That accepting our needs and asking for help is the first step to healing.
We must learn that community is a strength and that we are together to help and support each other.

@GlenM

Questions/Activities

What was the thing that stood out to you most in the introduction?

The easiness of read, the fact that the book is a true journey to personal growth. It is really innovative and well put. The first few sentences of it: "Really glad you started this book. We’ve been working hard on it. Get yourself a hot cup of coffee or tea, a pen, and a notebook. Find a good spot to sit and get comfortable. We have lots to talk about." were just so greately encouraing and motivating.

What was most important lesson you learned from the story of Ancora (Chapter 1)?

I learned about Trust, Love, and Hope. Also, one should ask for help effectively and let yourself be helped. Need causes us to lean on one another for help. This keeps us from becoming isolated.

How can we learn and help others get more comfortable with the idea that asking for help - or experiencing need - is a strength or a skill that we need to develop to help one another grow stronger?

By being more open and honest in our communications, especially with closer people or with ones close enough to need our help or just help in general. Also, it could be helpful to illustrate with personal stories, other people's victories, etc., just stories of overcoming an issue by hasping for help, which turned out to be both a strenght and a skill needed to develop to help one another grow stronger.

1 - Personal growth is not easy. As the book says, it isn't a "straight line". It's a very, very squiggly line, one that we have to write out ourselves.

2 - Life is forever changing. It seems that it's important for us to actually feel things, such as grief, anxiety, stress. It makes up who we are, and a lot of who we are comes from our experiences.

3 - Tricky question! It states in the book that "the process of asking for, receiving, and giving help" is what ensures we stay [mentally/physically] content. Perhaps by emphasising that without asking, there is no receiving. Unfortunately (though sometimes very fortunately), we are not mind readers. We cannot help those who don't ask.

1.) The thing that stood out to me the most in the introduction is "We believe in you." It not only motivates me but also reminds me of my true potential.

2.) It is definitely not easy to ask for help. Sometimes, we just simply tell people to seek help, but we don't understand that they may have personal embarassment. It's essential to be patient and understanding. We eventually learned trust, hope, and love.

3.) We grow as we share and learn. If someone doesn't know that, we remind them, but patiently. Nowadays, asking for help should be normalized for every single individual as there's nothing wrong with admitting our problem.

@GlenM

1. What was the thing that stood out to you most in the introduction?

I loved the following points:

• What people do makes sense based on where they are and everyone is trying their best
• Progress doesn't necessarily happen in a straight line, in the way that we expect, or in a way that necessarily looks like progress or something healthy

I find that philosophy reassuring when I'm doing listening, and I tend to feel like that's the basis for advice-giving being both unnecessary and unhelpful. People can learn what they need to learn at their own pace through their own experiences based on wherever they are at any given moment. People can often trust their own feelings when making decisions, and if they do that continuously then things have a way of automatically self-correcting and they gradually become experts on what works or doesn't work for them.

2. What was the most important lesson you learned from the story of Ancora (Chapter 1)?

I was able to see in this story a model for something that I've personally experienced over the past few months on 7 Cups:

• I started from a position of feeling isolated
• I received support
• As a result of that support I felt empowered to help others
• Helping others has provided me with a sense of meaning and accomplishment
• This act of helping simultaneously has the potential to catalyze a similar process in other people

What I'm struggling with in this story is the fact that growth can happen in an uneven or imbalanced way. If there's a person who is self-aware and values their own vulnerability, but they are surrounded by other people who *don't* value it, then I feel like the most likely outcome of them trying to share their private pain and depend on others who aren't as healthy or emotionally intelligent as they are is *not* growth... but rather *trauma*.

I love experiencing and sharing vulnerability, and when I'm in that state I feel a rush or openness as though I am in a higher state of being or becoming one with the world. But I also feel like those states are transient and depend on specific environmental conditions that are not always present or within my control. So, for everyday life, I find defensiveness, distrust, caution, and critical scrutiny to be practical, healthy, and adaptive responses to a reality in which other people are often not able to meet my needs.

I'd disagree with the notion that I need to cast out my own fear or see it as something unhealthy when it often very clearly has a wise and compassionate purpose behind it. My conception of unconditional positive regard and self-compassion is that unhealthy things are permitted to exist for as long as they feel necessary, and they will dissipate somewhat effortlessly when they outlive their usefulness.

3. How can we learn and help others get more comfortable with the idea that asking for help - or experiencing need - is a strength or a skill that we need to develop to help one another grow stronger?

I believe the only way that a person can feel comfortable asking for help and connecting with their need is if they are in an environment that is non-judgmental, accepting, and responsive to their needs.

People will only open up if they either feel safe/comfortable or if their need becomes so desperate that they feel like they have no choice.

I believe that attempts to pry people open like clam shells tend to backfire spectacularly--precisely because that type of action undermines a person's safety. If someone tries to do that to me, I tend to see that as a red flag that they do not respect my inner processes or have the spirit of non-violence that would make them *worthy* of the privilege of witnessing all of the magical things that are happening inside of me.

@GlenM

1) The beginning of the book itself warms your heart.
Making us realize that change can be tough.
And tough means that you might need a helping hand.
That's where 7cups comes in.

2) By helping each other we grow and enter another cycle of needing help, seeking it, and helping others and growing again.

3) Asking for help is seen as a weakness and that's what makes people think twice before asking help. To change that we need to change the way we see the route to success.
What we tell people is to try until you succeed.
What we should start telling them is
Try-Fail-Ask for Help-Try-Succeed

@GlenM

What was the thing that stood out to you most in the introduction?

I really liked the part that expressed "feeling unsure is normal". Especially in our times, when we are all struggling with a new way of life.

What was most important lesson you learned from the story of Ancora (Chapter 1)?

I really liked how it tied things back to trust and hope. Shutting off from the world doesn't help your situation in the long-run, be open to trust, hope and love.

How can we learn and help others get more comfortable with the idea that asking for help - or experiencing need - is a strength or a skill that we need to develop to help one another grow stronger?

One thing I do is tell people directly that admire their courage for asking for help. I try to validate I hear when they tell me that they are scared and unsure, but I also then make emphasize that I acknowledge the important step they are taking in doing something proactive to feel better.

1. What was the thing that stood out to you most in the introduction?
How much 7 cups loves and believes in each one of us

2. What was  most important lesson you learned from the story of Ancora (Chapter 1)?  Â

I learned that I should not try to run away from my problems and my being different because it is what make me really live my life.

3. How can we learn and help others get more comfortable with the idea that asking for help - or experiencing need - is a strength or a skill that we need to develop to help one another grow stronger?

We can be more open to talk about problems and not act as if we don't have any. We should be open to receiving help and to give help ourselves.