Course 3: PL 102 - Denial & Distractions (Discussion 3)

@GlenM

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

Denial can be good or bad. In some cases, it can help us to not focus on the negatives. However, the bad kind of denial can result in you being numb and emotionless, losing people you love throughout the melancholy journey.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

Things that operate outside of your awareness are things you've done for so long it has become second-nature to you. This can be good for eating or driving but like anything, you can have too much of something or too little of something, you always should choose the middle path. If you operate a lot outside of your awareness your brain is controlling you, you are not thinking and considering what you are doing before reacting.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

1. The pursuit for perfection- although we should do our best, doing our best and perfection are two different things that many people fail to see the difference between. I think this is the most powerful distraction because it means you will never be happy. Nobody is perfect so you will forever be looking for something that is unattainable.

2. Social Media- Although social media has brought us together to some degree it has also been designed to distract us.

3. People- Some people are just bad associations. And these negative associations serve as constant distractions to your goals and dreams that drain away from your happiness.

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

Denial is when a person (or even a whole society) does not accept the existence of a problem, situation or feeling in order to protect themselves from discomfort. It is often an unconscious state.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

That how we relate to people has become an unconscious process, as we learned how to relate to people at a young age and now do it mostly automatically. Just knowing this will, I hope, help me to take a step back and think about how I relate to the people around me and how I am affecting them and how they are affecting me.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

I believe the top 3 distractions will be different for everyone. For me personally, of the ones mentioned in the book, they are accomplishments, social media/ general online distractions and videogames. I think accomplishments is the most powerful for me, but I think videogames are a lot more closely linked with this than I realised before - in a videogame you make constant accomplishments. In real life things get in the way but in a game you get a list of missions and you can do them all and get them ticked off your list, and it feels good!

Please read chapters 2 and 3 and then answer the following questions:

1. How would you define denial in your own words? Denial is postponing acceptance of a fact or condition to a later date.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious? We need to be very careful how much we shutoff our natural self and do what other people want. It can make it difficult later to express our emotions naturally.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why? Internet and cell phone, televsion, music. The internet and cell phone is always there with us more than anything else.

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@GlenM

1) It's something that you've been trying to deny something that isn't bringing any pleasant but you know that if you keep denying it, it'll be bigger and troublesome than before.

2) I learned that distractions and denial are good in certain ways. It tells me that we need to not distract ourselves too much because it could lead us to bigger and problematic problems.

3) 1) food
2) online distractions
3) school
For me, the most powerful among these three is school. I say so because everyone is being shaped by the people and environment among them. Not every student works well under pressure and high expectations. negative traits will likely flow in their blood vessels if their rights and needs are not being met.

1. How would you define denial in your own words?
Denial is avoiding the current facts; could be a delayed acceptance or a complete rejection.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?
That these can be really dangerous. Everything that is hidden can do more damage than the ones in plain sight. Often we didn't realize that we do unhealthy habits until we had to deal with the consequences.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?
Top 3 distraction systems: Food, Social Media, Video Games.
I think everything that offers comfort and provide people's need is the most powerful. Different people, of course, have different distraction; because everyone finds comfort differently. For me personally, the most powerful is video games. I check on my games many times in a day.

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

Denial means to pretend everything is okay. It is to hide away some of our fears, our anger, the ugly parts of ourselves, and pretend they aren’t there. It is to look away from the things that disturb us or worry us, and pretend they don’t exist. It is to choose to stay passive because it’s what’s familiar and comfortable for us, instead of fighting for something better. Denial is to choose a comforting lie.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

I learned that even if we refuse to look at our ugly emotions, they are still there, and they affect every part of our lives even if we are unaware of them. Ignoring them simply perpetuates the triangle of conflict, and keeps us anxious and emotionally drained. The things outside of our awareness or consciousness do not simply go away, and we will continue to seek out people and experiences who match the unconscious patterns we have formed and grown used to.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

The top 3 are probably social media, accomplishments and school. Of these 3 I believe accomplishments are the most powerful. Everyone has heard a thousand times over that social media is highly addictive and damaging, and most students happily denounce the education system for being too focused on grades and hard skills instead of learning and soft skills.

However, accomplishments are seen as gold medals in this day and age. This is compounded by social media, which opens our eyes to the myriad of accomplishments others have achieved. On the surface, achievements seem to motivate us to work harder and pursue our dreams, but as we learned in a previous course, goals only get us so far, and the moment we reach them, we’re grasping for more. It’s a never ending cycle that only pushes us to work harder and harder for the next big accomplishment, and leaves us feeling like failures when we don’t get there. Goals and achievements don’t really matter as much as they seem to, but are trumpeted at us from the day we are born. That is why it is the one I believe is the most powerful distraction system

1. I would define denial as a rejection of acceptance. More specifically, in my experience it is often a defense mechanism which is used as a way to cling to a preferable reality.

2. Our unconscious actions, the ones that we are so used to doing that we can perform them on “autopilot”, are the big thing that operate outside of our awareness. I learned that taking the time to consciously perform them, to question their presence in our lives, can lead to tremendous growth.

3. I think that the top three distraction systems are material belongings and the pursuit of them, social media, and food. I believe that the first of these, material belongings and the pursuit of them, is the most powerful one. We need far less than we convince ourselves we do, and the pursuit of material things and the money with which to buy them drives an overwhelming majority of our actions and taking up a huge portion of our time. They often serve as a distraction from genuine experiences.

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

From our community`s point of view, I believe denial could be when certain people engage within the community are rather reluctant whenever thinking of 7 Cup`s mission, rules and guidelines. Denial can be described as the action of not accepting / refusing the sense of truth which is led by and within a community.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

An unconscious action / thing that it is always to be developed. They are a learnt skill that outgrows its state again and again.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

In my opinion, the 3 main types of distractions are: Visual & auditive distractions (everything we see can make us pay attention to details, especially when seeing something new and also hearing certain sounds or new and familiar voices and noises), manual distractions (using your hands and getting practical can often distract the mind and the thoughts by getting ahold onto something more palpable, that can be physically felt) & cognitive distractions (so many things that are running through our minds and make us daydream for example; these can be either worrying or racing thoughts, inner processing etc). Three specific examples could be:

- Social media & cell phones (visual & auditive distractions): we are in a permanent search for easier ways to discover, learn and keep in touch with others, and cell phones are pretty on handy. I think pressing on a social platform app first thing waking up or turning the phone on, are things that happen to loads of people, and can also be unconsciously.

- Food & cooking (Manual distraction): food and cooking give us something to do. We are using our hands and it is always perceived as an action, as we are physically moving whilst doing both of these, whether that may be chewing a slice of carrot cake or cut an onion.

- Overthinking/Imagination Exercises (Cognitive Distraction): human beings are creative living organisms. Each of us experience such episodes at some point in our lives and it can draw our attention far, far away from where we are and what we should be doing.

@GlenM

How would you define denial in your own words?

Denial involves the rejection of a fact that is too painful for a person to accept. It’s a coping mechanism, along with the way it impacts us and our relationships it’s a defense mechanism in which confrontation with a personal problem or with reality is avoided by denying the existence of the problem or reality.

What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

Behaviors and patterns we have learned that might get used to it, eventually they move to our unconsciousness and even physically to our muscle memory.

What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

1. Work

2. Relationship

3. Social Media: I believe this is the most powerful one, because it impacts our lives in all aspects, and successfully replaced a lot of other factors and methods like: newspapers and direct communication like calls or outings which got minimized and replaced by texting.

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

I would define denial as the unwillingness to believe or admit something, it can even be not admitting/realizing the truth to something.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

I think the most important thing I learned is that things that happen outside of our awareness can be a learned behaviour.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

1. Social media

2. Family/friends/people

3. Employment

I believe all three of these can be huge distractions for us, both good and bad. Social media usually involves us being on our phones, which distracts us from current situations or people that can be happening in the real world. Social media can become a cycle where we feel we need it. Employment I think is a huge distraction in life, you have to work or make an income in order to live and substation the human needs. Work takes us away from so much though. We miss out on many opportunities, events, we even can be so distracted with work that we forget to self care and even forget the important things in life. But we need money for a quality of life so we need work. The most powerful distraction in life to me is family/friends/people, people, they can be positive or negative distractions at times. We need social interactions, and most human minds crave it. We crave being around those we love and care about, we focus a lot of our attention on friends/family. Sometimes they can distract us though by being too opinionated or expecting too much out of us.