Course 3: PL 102 - Denial & Distractions (Discussion 3)

@GlenM

Questions/Activities

How would you define denial in your own words?

Denial is, in my own words, is the conscious or subcounscious rejection by an individual of the reality, of something that is obvious and true. It is a non acceptance state, a refusal.

What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

That it can (and should) be a learnt behavior.

What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems?

Food.

Online disctractions.

Accomplishments.

Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

Hard to say... perhaps online distractions, because it is so widely avaiable and so heavily manipulated at the same time.

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

I think denial is when we're conscious about something, but we don't want to believe it. We're sort of in a state of confusion.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

What we do isn't always a reflection of ourselves.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

Accomplishments, school, offline distractions. I think accomplishments can be the most powerful - if we were to focus on these and to really look into what we have achieved, as opposed to maybe running ourselves down or not believing in ourselves, we may actually be bettering ourselves and earn even more accomplishments!

1.) Denial means you're trying to protect yourself by refusing to accept the truth about something that's happening in your life.

2.) Some repeated behaviors can become unconscious without change and recognition.

3.) I personally believe the top 3 distraction systems are social media, wealth, and accomplishments. I think wealth is the most powerful one. Wealth distracts us from finding our true happiness. As the book said, "You can find yourself stacking up piles and piles of money with no real benefit in your life. In fact, many times it just brings additional pain." We have to keep getting more and more to keep that happiness drip working.

@GlenM

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

As described, denial is one of the later stages of a process in which something that was originally pretty complete and expansive has parts of it cut away because they are painful:

• Originally people are themselves
• Certain parts are unacceptable to others and people learn through experience "If I am/do/think/feel X, then this horrible thing happens (e.g. rejection by someone important) and I suffer"
• In order to avoid that outcome, people stop connecting with those parts of themselves and create an alternative self that is functional but a bit smaller and less complete because it has all of the "bad" things cut away or held hostage so that they aren't allowed to express themselves
• Repression is when at a certain point, this incomplete self becomes something habitual and people come to believe that this is a complete self or that there isn't anything beyond that
• Denial is when certain cracks in this partial self start to appear (i.e. the repressed self emerges) and a person engages in efforts to block or suppress that alternative self because it is anxiety-provoking (and understandably because prior instances of connecting with that self resulted in suffering in actual practical experience)

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

What I found really striking is how compassionate the whole process is. The image I have is like a child giving away their teddy bear to try to keep their mom from getting angry at them. "I want your love so much that I'll do anything. I'll get rid of these parts of me if you don't like them. I care about these parts os much but just please, please don't hurt me by abandoning or rejecting me."

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

I feel like each person probably has their own hierarchy of what's most powerful for them. I prefer not to share mine, but I'll say that three among many which feel compelling are online distractions (and I'd single out online news in particular), social media, and accomplishments.

Of those, I'd say online news feels quite powerful because it hacks into a bunch of different instincts:

• Self-protection: "I need to know what's happening in the world so I can protect myself"
• Compassion: "I need to know what's happening in the world so I'm not turning a blind eye to suffering"
• Social connection: "I need to know what's happening so that I have things to talk about and I can feel connected with other people who care about news events"

@GlenM

1. Denial is not consciously accepting our unconscious thoughts.

2. The most important thing to realize is the shadow effect. The unconscious thoughts control us, whether we accept them or not. At least when we accept them, we give ourselves a chance to work on it or improve on it.

3. Three most distraction systems that I have seen around me are Food, Social Media, and Employment. These things distract people so much that they forget about the real problems or areas of growth. These systems are deeply rooted in our psyche and hence are hard to fight.

Of these, food is the most powerful. Because we have been used to our food habits since our childhood and most people don't even know what is meant by healthy food or how to bring it in our daily life.

@GlenM

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

- Denial is avoiding the reality of a situation/situations to protect ourselves.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

- The most important thing I have learned about thing that is outside of awareness is that it's all about familiarity and feeling comfortable. When things take us out of our comfort zone, we go back to the place or person that put us back in our comfort zone, even if it was unhealthy or toxic. It starts with relationships and habits in childhood.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

-Top 3 distractions: Money, Social Media, Accomplishments. The most powerful one is Money. People kill over money and possessions. Everyone wants to provide for themselves and their loved ones. Although it is good, some people get desperate and make bad decisions involving money. Gambling, stealing, robbery, scheming are all negative ways to get money.

@GlenM

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

Denial is refusing the truth because of many reasons could be trauma, hurtful or different to self-belief. Denial can also not accepting some statement or chose not to acknowledge the problem.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

That there are so many things that we repeated doing to the point it's just a normal routine and unaware of doing it. It can be a learned behaviour.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

1. Food

2 internet and TV. This is definitely the most powerful distraction. I can forget eating by just scrolling on social media and spend an endless amount of time.

3 shopping

@GlenM

How would you define denial in your own words?

Sticking your head in the sand Meaning that we won't acknowledge what we know is true whether that is conscious or unconscious

What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

That sometimes these are learned behaviors.

What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems?

Our devices (phones, tablets, computers, NetFlix)
Social media
Worrying about what others think
Screen reader support enabled.

@GlenM

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

Denial, in my opinion, is the act of intentionally or unintentionally ignoring a situation that for one reason or another one refuses to face. We hide from ourselves.

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

Whether we are aware of it or not, the unconscious have a great influence on us. It is all the elements that have been relegated somewhere in our head but which act in the shadow of our consciousness.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

The top 3 distractions systems are Wealthe, Accomplishments and Social Media.

The most powerful thing for me is Wealthe. It's something that is displayed and promoted by everything around us: music videos, social medias, movies, ads...These days, you're under pressure to succeed before you turn 30. Being in your twenties and not driving your dream car or buying your dream mansion (and of course posting it on social medias) can make us feel like we missed out on our life.

1. How would you define denial in your own words?

Denial is the process of refusing something, most often our own emotions. Like we deny that we are feeling angry because we learned that anger is bad, we are in denial about our anger

2. What is the most important thing you learned about things that operate outside of awareness or the unconscious?

There is a big part of us that operates outside of our awareness. As we learn things and behaviours they are moved to the unconscious.

3. What do you believe are the top 3 distraction systems? Which one of these is the most powerful and why?

Food, social media, wealth

I think social media is the most powerful distraction system as it gives us the false idea that we are having relationships just like we did when we are offline. And its nearly impossible to resist