Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #6) How to Accept Feedback

@Heather225

Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react? How did you feel? Why do you think you reacted and feel that way? What would you do differently after having watched the video?

To be honest, I did start working on taking feedbacks and even the criticism with grace for quite some time. I did realize I am a very small individual and I still have a lot to learn and grow. I don't deny my ego feeding me with the most perfect opinions of myself but at the same time, I try to be as open to feedbacks and opinions as possible. Sometimes I feel hurt, other times I am alright with it. I take them as a review and I work on it. It did help me evolve.

Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react? How did you feel?

I recently received feedback about something I misunderstood so I didn’t do what I was supposed to, the right way. When I received the feedback I felt terrible, I had worked so hard at it, and felt like I let not only myself down, but others as well. I know the person giving me the feedback was not out to make me feel bad, or telling me I did it completely wrong, so I reacted calmly and just apologized a dozen times to them. I did feel like a failure in the first few moments after receiving the feedback and was hard on myself.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?

I think as much as I know that feedback is a good thing and not always a bad thing, but in that moment I felt it was terrible. I forgot for a few moments that you don’t fail, you just learn, and to learn and grow feedback is cruitial. I always aim to do my best at whatever I do, so receiving feedback is often hard for me.

What would you do differently after having watched the video?

The video has actually taught me to have appreciation for feedback, as well as appreciating the person who is giving it to me. Asking for advice is often challenging, as I am a very strong willed person and do like to think I am capable of doing things on my own. But after watching the video I have realized that asking for advice with the feedback, can be really valuable. Next time I am given feedback, rather that saying sorry, I think I will say thank you, and ask what I can be doing better. I will also realize that feedback is what helps us grow and step further into our best selves!

Think about the most recent feedback you received:
How did you react? How did you feel?
I frowned then took time to reflect. First, I felt like I wasn't appreciated. My work was useless and felt like I'm failing. Then after some pondering, I thought about how the person giving me feedback could actually care about my work so that I could do and be better.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?
I think it's because feedback usually means there's something wrong and bad. Who does like to be told that they're wrong and bad? Well, I personally don't like to be wrong or bad or both. I've been trying to be careful and thorough doing my job, check and re-check everything. But then I recieved feedback. It was like getting a bad score on my final exam.

What would you do differently after having watched the video?
I would recieve feedback and take time to reflect about it. Objectively think that it's about 'what'and 'how' I do, not 'who' I am. So it's "my work was bad", not "I was stupid, careless, useless, etc." By focusing on my work, hopefully I can clearly see my mistakes, correct them, and eventually improve my performance.

To the person gave me feedback, I would thank and appreciate them for the feedback, also telling them that I would like to get more feedback in the future.

@Heather225

while feedback id the fuel for growth it can be uncormfortable to hear. my first response was to defend myself. after some self evaluation however i could see how the person could give me the feedback. although i initially felt attacked, i researched and read some articles to help me improve. from that i grew and i,m more receptive to feedback even if its negative and to be honest its still difficult sometimes.

the video was informative and insightful. i felt better and like i learnt something

@Heather225

Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react? How did you feel? Why do you think you reacted and feel that way? What would you do differently after having watched the video?

I was quiet and listening but I was also getting emotional. The feedback was spot on and helpful. I felt this way because it was true and I wasnt taking the right decisions. After the video, i learnt that i should practice to listen fully, digest and patiently think about what to do next.

@Heather225

1. How did you react?

I believe in constructive feedback being one way of understanding how you should improve. I love feedback and I welcome it whatever the situation I may be in!

How did you feel?

Pretty excited, because I knew there are things I could improve and learn! I`m always up for reflecting upon other`s opinions!

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?

Because I love improvement and I like knowing that people around me are comfortable with my work and what I do in general.

What would you do differently after having watched the video?

I have learnt that I am usually doing the first 3 out of 4 things stated in the video as being the way to receiving amazing feedback; what I do is staying calm & listening, and being receptive and appreciative, as well as asking for advice. However, I should be definitely setting follow ups from now on!

@Heather225

1. How did you react?

I accepted the feedback gladly with a light heart and understood it carefully, focused on my flaws and worked on improving it with appreciation.

How did you feel?

I felt excited to learn and improve more and strengthen my areas of weakness.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?

Because I want to grow and be better, I want to be more capable and responsible for my role.

What would you do differently after having watched the video?

I will take a deep breath and calm myself next time I am about to get feedback, because that would give me time to remember that it's okay to fail and try to improve.

@Heather225

Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react?

I reacted in a positive manner because it came as a surprise to me as I didn't know that I possess that skill

How did you feel?

I felt amazing as I got to know something new about myself.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?

As I said, I reacted in a surprising way because their feedback helped me unleash my hidden talent.

What would you do differently after having watched the video?

After watching the video, I am convinced that yes, feedback is the fuel necessary for our growth. I have always been open to constructive feedback & this video has only helped me to be more open to them.

@Heather225

How did you react? It was hard for me to hear the feedback! I tried to remain calm despite being sad.

How did you feel? I felt defensive and offended.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way? Sometimes, it's hard for me to understand how my actions affect other people. I have to understand that what I say and do can impact how another person is feeling.

What would you do differently after having watched the video? After watching the video, I want to try and think about my actions before I act. I want to also try and be calmer about all aspects of life!

@Heather225

How did you react?

I had it with my new mentor at work. I have worked with her for 9 years; she has been in a supervisory role over me for 9 years. So, throughout the years, I completely trust her, she has proved feedback to me for 9 years. So, when she was providing feedback to me, it actually was not bad and did not sting. One, I think this is because we have a trusting relationship, and it is all about delivery. I accepted the feedback and agreed with her and acknowledged I wanted more direction and guidance in the area.

How did you feel?

I am hard on myself and feel like a failure about a lot of things right now in my life, so negative feedback is easier to hear. However, I felt alright about it because I felt she was giving me truth in a positive meaningful way.

Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?

I think I reacted and felt that way, because right now I am feeling like a failure at my job, though I am not and my mentor reminds me of that, it is just the spot I am in right now. I also, do like constructive feedback, and sometimes in the past it has stung and hurt, but with processing and thinking about it, I realize it is okay. When providing feedback, it really is all about relationship of the person who is giving it to you. The guy in the video, I felt did not do a great job demonstrating constructive feedback.

What would you do differently after having watched the video?

Remember to take a deep breath and just listen and separate the work from myself. Tell myself I am not perfect and I am not failing at everything.