Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

To judge or not to judge?

User Profile: TalkingSloth
TalkingSloth March 14th, 2024

Why do people judge others?

People judge others, as part of their identity maintenance protocols, via something we call projection.

People judge others, in the interest of re-associating feelings of guilt and shame, with something other than ones self.

People judge others, as part of a rudimentary coping strategy that keeps one general attention drawn to the outside world, away from one self and the inside.

People judge others, to elevate themselves above others.

People judge others, because they feel they're constantly being evaluated by a moral overseer, and if they don't, they'll get demerits.

People judge others, because it makes them feel good.

People judge others, because they lack self-knowledge and self-awareness.

People judge others, because they feel judged.

People judge others, because we are programmed to by society and our highly social nature.

People judge others, because they actually believe it's right to do so.

People judge others, because they actually believe it will make them a better person.

People judge others, because they actually believe it makes the world a better place.

People judge others, because they actually believe it solves problems.


What would happen if you stopped judging other people?

More of your attention would return home to shed light on you yourself, and the things you harbor inside of you. This would likely lead to an initial reaction in the form of seeking other stimulating, distracting, and bypassing coping strategies. Before finally leading to some grief about those things about yourself, that you hide from. The grief is there not to harm you, but to facilitate acceptance, integration, and growth/reform.

You would rapidly start to grow as a person.

You anger would start to die down, and you would become vulnerable. That vulnerability is not there to hurt you, but to open you up to life, other people and yourself, on a deeper level.

You would hurt far fewer people.

You would help far more people by making them feel accepted and worthy, which gives them motivation, self-esteem, hope, and a desire to fulfill their human potential and be a good person.

You would cause other people to also judge a little less, because people judge when they feel judged.

People would start to like you way more. You would become very attractive, because they would be able to sense acceptance and love in your presence, just because you didn't judge them.

5
User Profile: Sunisshiningandsoareyou
Sunisshiningandsoareyou March 17th, 2024

@TalkingSloth

Oh wow this was very thought-provoking.

Judgement and Assumptions do reflect the lack of curiosity and space for understanding as well as acceptance. Speaks so much more about the person judging than the one being judged, I feel.

2 replies
User Profile: TalkingSloth
TalkingSloth OP April 6th, 2024
@Sunisshiningandsoareyou Very good point, judgement sort of closes the case. It prevent further inquiry and understanding. It settles things to some, usually convenient, conclusion. It's a kind of darkness or ignorance in itself. Non-judgement is a kind of openness and awareness in itself. People confuse judgement with understanding but they are actually counter to one another. Judgement is a kind of moral stance, or ethical take/narrative about a real situation, which isn't wrong or invalid. But as you said it sort of puts out the flame of curiosity and the desire to real understanding of what is actually happening. So it is kind of nuanced, it's not to say judgement is wrong (itself a judgement) or that it has no place or no value. But what does have far far more value and needs to have a bigger place is understanding.
1 reply
User Profile: Sunisshiningandsoareyou
Sunisshiningandsoareyou April 10th, 2024

@TalkingSloth

Well said and exactly. Understanding connects, Judging limits!

load more
load more
User Profile: slowdecline48
slowdecline48 April 11th, 2024

Interesting thoughts but let's be realistic here: judgment is inevitable. We all judge others sooner or later, just as they judge us. Forming opinions is part of being human. What we should remember is that, with very few exceptions, any judgment we make about someone else is strictly provisional. It has to be, because we have only seen that person for a certain period of time in a certain place. It still applies in cases where you deal with someone repeatedly; you may know how your coworker acts & speaks where you do your job, but unless you've seen him/her at home or elsewhere, you have no idea what (s)he's like outside the workplace. Most of our judgments about other people can never be final because we don't gather enough information about them.

1 reply
User Profile: TalkingSloth
TalkingSloth OP April 11th, 2024

@slowdecline48 What I understood from your comment is this:

1) Humans judging each other is inevitable. It cannot be stopped.

2) Instead of trying to withhold judgement, an innate part of being human, we should rather make natural judgements with awareness of the fact that people do change.

3) We don't generally have enough information about other people anyway, to make far reaching and final judgements about them as a person, and so awareness to that aspect also should be maintained and promoted.

All of that may be so, what I'm saying is much more simple.

What I'm saying is that by way of that natural, innate, builtin human tenancy, to judge other humans, we are actually judging ourselves without realizing it. And awareness to that aspect should be maintained and promoted.

load more