Finally freed journal thread
This thread will contain a lot of topic sensitive things, so for the faint of heart please scroll by.. 🤗
I feel so free today, like I can not shake the feeling of the joy I feel. My daughter's bio got married and personally. For awhile, I was angry because he did not treat our child nor I right while we were there, but knowing that he is now married. I feel so much lighter, so much weight gone and taken off my shoulders. I didn't cry tears of sorrow, I cried tears of happiness because the person that hurt me while pregnant is no longer near me and has his attention elsewhere..
@PhoenixButterfly97 It's wonderful to hear that you're feeling a sense of freedom and joy today. It's completely understandable to have mixed feelings about this situation, especially if he didn't treat you both well in the past. It sounds like his new marriage has brought you a sense of relief, and that's a positive step. Feel free to share more if you'd like, and we are here to listen. ☺️
@Mya000 I'm not going to lie it did give me a huge sense of relief, I just never realized that I could feel that type of relief before. He had done some terrible things during my pregnancy, said the most cruelest things, and made me feel so beneath myself. An when I took the time to reflect, I realized that I was never the problem, of course I had my moments because being hormonal during pregnancy is a thing but the words he said, the way he would deflect was not my imagination they happened. During my healing/recovery I realized I was more of a second mom to him, always waking him up, picking up after him and doing the most even when I was high risk and shouldn't have, and he barely gave me bare minimum if that. The mistake I made was moving on too fast while living with him, because that gave him the tools he needed to flip it all on me and act like a "victim". Don't get me wrong, I apologized for my wrong doings and moved forward, when he realized that I wasn't falling for his stuff anymore, he would degrade me each time. He went as far as to try and tell me that he would "ditch" whom he is married to now to be with me and our child. I told him, no. I tried to warn her too, but she was too busy wearing her rose colored glasses and kept blaming me, because he is the type to not tell what he did wrong. I released him with love and kindness. I will never apologize for protecting my toddler, but i did apologize for how it went down.
@PhoenixButterfly97 I'm truly sorry to hear about what you've been through, and it's great that you've found a sense of relief and clarity in all of this. Recognizing that you've faced a challenging experience is important, and it appears that you've done just that. Dealing with someone who has been hurtful and manipulative, especially during a significant time like pregnancy, can be very tough. It's crucial to realize that none of this was your fault, and his behaviour towards you was absolutely unacceptable.
You've demonstrated a lot of self-awareness in your reflection. It's evident that you were doing your best to create a positive environment despite the challenges.
While warning others about similar situations might not yield immediate results, as they are manipulated, much like you were, it can be valuable for them in the future. It's always important to warn people and show them that you'll be there for them if they ever need support.
Thank you for sharing, your experience and insights can be helpful to others who may be going through similar challenges.