The Grove of a Spruce Tree 🌲

Aww, I missed an entry for yesterday :’) But I can quickly summarize how the day went. ❤️

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The day was pretty good overall! I had a meeting with the head of guidance, and it went well. Unfortunately, I won’t be able to come back to my old school as a junior, so I’ll have to be a senior and do a lot of catch-up work. That’ll mean that I won’t have much time to be on cups.. I literally have to complete 2 courses of social studies and 2 course of English in order to graduate, and they aren’t very straight forward (although I just about always do well anyways, but it takes so much effort). And I’ll have to take precalc again, which I honestly don’t mind, but I won’t be able to take advanced placement calculus, which is what I’ve been hoping for. And finally, I won’t be able to take AP Chem, but I am looking forward to AP Physics. ❤️

I also got a hair cut yesterday in preparation for the bridal shower tomorrow, and it was pretty good too. Now it’s not like 14 inches long, but up to my shoulders. 😀 It feels good not to have the baggage, lmaooo 😭 I’m still not looking forward to the bridal shower, but I have a feeling it’ll be okay. It’s the wedding that I’m worried about. :/ But anyways, I won’t go into too much detail on that.

I’m really glad that it’s the weekend, because hearing that I will have so much work to do leading up to the upcoming school year really jump-started my anxiety (and worsened my neuro condition :’)). But I have a feeling things will go well…I’ll just miss being here all the time. There may even be times when I can’t be online for weeks or even months at a time- it’ll be hard, but I’ll see what I can do to be on at least once per week during the school year (maybe weekends ❤️).

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I’ll leave the entry here, since I have to go. Take care, everyone, and have a good weekend! ❤️

Yayyyy, here is today’s entry ❤️ (I’m expecting this one to be a long one, since I have a lot to talk about 🙈)

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Today was a semi-okay day. The weather wasn’t really the best, but I was feeling pretty decent until the evening, when my stomach of course wanted to be mean. 😀 But I’m overcoming it, and now things aren’t so bad. ❤️

I mainly just took a break from everything and was on group chats the whole day. xD Even though it doesn’t sound like a good thing, I *really* needed that short-term distraction, since tomorrow is going to be such a long and overwhelming day. :’)

Tomorrow is the bridal shower- I’m not excited at all, to be honest. I mean, I don’t think anything negative is going to take place, but there’s just so much tension among my family right now. My whole life, my family has been a dysfunctional mess, but this is just the tip of the iceberg. This wedding is just going to cause more issues, and I don’t know if I can really take that. I’m already struggling with my anxiety as it is; this is just gonna cause more additional stress, and infuriate whatever physical condition I have :’) (Whatever condition I have isn’t neurological apparently, so I’m not sure what to call it- I’ll just say it in conjunction with anxiety, since that usually induces it) So yeah, not looking forward to this. I’ll have to be there for 3 hours, and time is gonna go so slowly.. I barely even know the bride’s family (or the bride for that matter), and I’m not good being around unfamiliar people.. :’)

Oh well, at least I don’t have the sinking feeling that I’m having about the actual wedding itself. It’s gonna be a whole other story, since it’s in a more open area (the bridal shower will be in a restaurant), so there are more chances of disasters to happen. I just know that something is going to go wrong, and I’m usually right about these things.. But I’ll overcome this, I know I will. ❤️

But on the bright side, the wedding won’t be until June 16th, so I won’t need to worry too much beforehand. That’s a relief honestly, because I need to finish working on my Economics coursework.

Actually, that reminds me to update on what happened with the meeting with the head of guidance at my old school. I mentioned that I’ll have to become a senior next year, but there is one detail I forgot to mention. It’s compulsory that I take a half-year course of Economics. However, since I am taking a similar Economics course in my current school, the credit can actually count, meaning that I won’t need to take the course again at my old school. That would be ideal, given how much work I will have- I need to catch up from 11th grade in addition to my 12th grade courses, and it will be a lot. If I can at least get Economics out of the way, I will have more time to work on everything else that I need to graduate. So that’s great news! 😌

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I think this was wayyyyy too long of an entry, so I’ll leave it here. Due to the bridal shower, I don’t believe I’ll be on here at all tomorrow, except early in the morning and late at night. So I’ll definitely see you all on Monday! Hope you all have a good rest of the weekend. 🤗 ❤️

It’s entry time 😛

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I don’t know how to describe today 😀 (What a great way to start an entry, am I right? 🙈) But it’s the truth- I mean, it wasn’t awful, but it wasn’t the best either.

The morning was not so good actually. :’) I woke up to my mom having a breakdown, which triggered my anxiety pretty badly. It took some time for both of us to calm down enough to have breakfast. We were both worried about the bridal shower, and regretted accepting the invitation. I know that sounds strange, since it’s my brother who’s getting married. However, given the circumstances, it’s not easy to think positive about the marriage at the moment.. 😀

Eventually, we were getting ready to go, and honestly, I wasn’t such a fan getting dressed up formally. Every time I need to, I feel like a doll. Luckily, I was feeling mostly feminine, but even then, I just don’t like formal attire. But the garment did look good, so I was able to tolerate it. ❤️

By the time we arrived at the restaurant for the bridal shower, I was actually shaking.. :’) I wasn’t sure what to expect, since I was literally going to have lunch with complete strangers, and with my grandmother, who really gets on my mom’s nerves. And given that I’m an empath and so close to my mom, I can sense every anxious reaction from her. There were several during the bridal shower, but I tried my best not to let them bother me. Surprisingly, my social anxiety didn’t kick in at all, so I was actually pretty chatty with some people there. Overall, I had a pretty good time. 😊

But there are a few things that are bothering me, and I won’t elaborate on them because they are a bit personal. I did talk to my close listener friendsie about it, so I’m feeling much better about it- the complexity of the issue was weighing on my mind, so at least I was able to relieve myself of that burden. ❤️

All in all, the bridal shower was much better than I expected, and I’m very pleased. Even though I still have a pretty bad feeling about the wedding, it won’t be for around 3 weeks, which is good. 😌 Until then, I’ll do the best I can to stay focused on my schoolwork and not let anything bother me. ❤️✨

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Have a good night, everyone! Love ya all beyond words 🤗 ❤️

❤ @selflessSpruce1515 ❤

@selflessSpruce1515

I really liked this one!

I don't have a lot to talk about today, but overall, it was such an amazing day! I tried my best not to be here and to focus on my offline life, and it was pretty successful actually. So that definitely made my day. However, I did miss being in the group chats and seeing all my friendsies, but I felt that it was important to take some time to reflect and take some action in my offline world for once. I was able to do several lessons in my Economics coursework, and was able to make progress on my project. But you know what was the best part- I was able to focus on myself and do some self-care, which I rarely ever do. 🤗 ❤️

To make up for this being a short entry, I'll make another post with a reminder for all of my dear friendsies, as well as for others who come across my grove. So be prepared ✌️😛✨

Speaking of self-care, here is a reminder for all of youuuuuu 😌 ❤️

Take care of yourself, because you deserve it more than you know 🤗 ❤️

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🥰 Tagging my amazing friendsies: @Angelx28 @Sunisshiningandsoareyou @emotionalTalker2260 @Everlee @coldbreeze00 @mytwistedsoul @fearfearfear @BookishBlue13 @AGuardianAngel @Wheeki16 @JennyINFP @SystemFireSkye @CupoSad076 @DonaldDraper @FreddieOnyx @jv13076 @BlueDarkAurora @TryingTBH2021 @taylorhugs12 @elli025 @Wefington @ruggedheart0 @kieran000 @Fluffysheep8 @KaikaiKitan @MelodyoftheOcean 🥰

So I'm gonna post two songs that I absolutely loveeeeeee 🤗 ❤️

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It's time for a flash to the past (well, more like 2013 xD) - When I first this song, it was on the loudspeaker of my local supermarket (don't ask how I still remember that...I have no idea xD) - it was the time before the trauma, when things were actually really good (even though there were some difficult times then, but nothing compared to the trauma). I heard it for the first time in almost 10 years, and it made me smile so bright (and maybe also made me cry 🙈). It was such a pleasant surprise, given all that happened in my life since that day, and it reminded me of the good times. 🤗 ❤️ The sad thing is that you don't hear songs like these anymore :') I miss that decade 😭

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Now fast forward to the 2020's - I know it was a rough time for a lot of us, and honestly, in my opinion, the music in this year wasn't the best (but that's just me, of course 😀). However, I heard this song for the first time a few weeks ago, and then heard it again today in the car. I usually don't like alternative-pop, but this song is different somehow, and aligned with my mood exactly. It's honestly an awesome song, not just because of the great beats, but also the mood lyrics. ❤️❤️❤️

It's entry timeeeeee 😌✨

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Today was a mostly good day! Even though my negative thoughts were trying to roll in as they always do, I did whatever I could to not let them affect me. There were times when I thought they were going to take over, but it was my amazing friendsies on here who reminded me that I'm stronger than my thoughts, and that I can overcome whatever comes my way. I can never thank you all enough for being there for me during my good and bad days, and for giving me a shoulder to lean on when I needed it most. ❤️

I was able to finish all of the schoolwork that I needed to earlier in the day, which gave me some time to continue working on some self-improvement methods, such as affirmations and gratitude journaling. 😊 It was something that I came up with recently, and I was actually inspired by some discussions on this site and by the self-help guides. I know how important it is to express your appreciation for the things you have and the people in your life who have made such a difference. There are also so many affirmations that I have come up with in the past week that I continue looking back to- they really help to motivate me to be the best version of myself and to stay strong as I endure my daily challenges. ❤️ I have been working so hard these past few months to cope with the new circumstances, and I have seen how much I have grown- it is honestly so beautiful, and even though I'm usually modest about my accomplishments, I feel that this is a great place to highlight them. 🤗 ❤️

For the rest of this week, I am thinking of restarting my yoga regimen and maybe even start biking again. The weather is so nice now, and I can do these activities early in the morning! It won't just be good for my physical health, but also my mental health. 😌 We all need that chance to step back from our chaotic lives and do something kind for ourselves. ❤️ It's not easy to think in this mindset when it feels like you're drowning, and there are times when I've experienced that so I can completely relate- however, when we are in a more positive mood, we can take advantage of our clear minds and our open hearts to work towards a better us- we're not perfect, but we can do what we can to see a light at the end of the tunnel. 🤗

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I'll end the entry here, because I should start heading to bed now. Have a goodnight, everyone! ❤️❤️❤️

Hey hey, everyone ❤️❤️❤️

It's the first day of June for me, but it's not just any typical month for a lot of us. I'm happy to announce that today is the first day for Pride Month, also called LGBTQ+ Awareness month!! 🏳️‍🌈

This is such a personal month for me for so many reasons- I have been a closeted queer hooman bean for 2-3 years, and I was actually afraid of who I was as a person, and never really accepted the fact that I was different. Now, I have been declared genderfluid and pansexual for around 4 months now, and I absolutely appreciate my individuality and just myself as a person. Being on 7 Cups made me feel more accepted and loved for who I was, and even though I am still closeted unfortunately (and probably will never reveal my true identity given the circumstances), I'm so happy that I don't have to keep it to myself. And I'm sure so many other members of the LGBTQ+ community are proud to be a part of such a spectacular community as 7 Cups! 🤗 ❤️

In commemoration of this special month, I will be having the following picture as my profile picture throughout the whole month of June:

^ I literally created this picrew pfp just last night, and I wanted to make it as festive as possible, with the rainbow inspired by @coldbreeze00 and @Everlee 😛 I also included the genderfluid flag badge, of course, to represent myself as a proud genflu 😌✨

Without further ado, I wish you all a wonderful pride month!!! 🏳️‍🌈 ❤️

And if you all have any stories to share regarding your journey within the LGBTQ+ community, feel free to reply to this post! This is a supportive space, and any posts that are disrespectful of the LGBTQ+ community, towards myself, or towards others will get reported, so think before you post.

Again, happy Pride month, everyone! I wish you all the very best, and stay spruceyyyyy! 😛✨