What's your most recent achievement?

Getting the job I thought i would not get

Made it through the day alive. I survived today, so lets do it again tomorrow.

I got an A on my briefing paper which means that for this class all I have to do is write my final paper which isn't due for another 6 weeks.

I had a dream where I was a squiggly line and i was conversing with the stars like on some floating platform, something out of marios bros., and i was standing on it there in a nebulous void, a hypothetical vacuum, there wereeven coins in the air, coins scattered around the void, gold coins that were the stars and they were talking to me from like a billion miles above. i was asked to understand the essence of nothing and the absence of nothing. and all was non-being but non-being looked like a wheel of radiating fire. then i somehow i was like on a roller coaster looping around in the heavens until i was swimming in a flux of phantoms like bats and crayola-flowers, mirrors candles all melded together in a weird phobia vision till i felt like i understood water. i had drowned but i was still alive and i knew water inside and out. water and fire were the same concept, twin brothers night and day, i saw it perfectly but a voice spoke and said the real gold is the wind that i could not yet see so i had to become a little miniature automaton like dude a toy soldier living forever inside a windmill. everything was cartoonish. constructed out of hyperreal pixellated puzzle pieces. tempest raging outside i could hear the torrents of rain belting down a million miles an hour and i could feel the blue/purplish lightning going off outside the windmill. but it all got scary when i saw these monstrous clocks everywhere. personified clock faces. really freakish grotesque looking clocks. cuckoo clocks and grandfather clocks making a hubbub of insane mechanical sounds. nightmare voices. and when i realized how scary it was the giant black spiders that i often dream of materialized and consumed everything. i felt their cold texture and they terrified me so much that was when i woke up.

Getting through the day.

this is kind of pathetic-sounding but i was able to talk to someone who i

Today I frankly cant find any...there must be something I did good, something I achieved, but right now Im in the middle of a panic attack, and all I can see is that I am there again, no matter how good I do in my life, at night panic is there, every single night :-(

I cant take this anymore

Getting selected as a finalist for the Questbridge National College Match! This means that I was not one of the 10,000 people who got cut from the program and I am in the running for a full four year scholarship to college!

My workplace is permanently closing. I had a month to find a new one before I was officially out of the job. I just got hired at this place that I think will be much better for my sanity and personal/financial growth. I didnt think I could do it, but now that I have, Im pretty proud of myself. I just hope Im good enough at the job to thrive.

I managed to be social today more than usual with only a minimal amount of anxiety about what to say to someone I didn't know yet. Sometimes I decide not to for lack of anything that seems clever but this time I spoke up anyway. :) This seems like more of an accomplishment after a long bout of depression which left me most days without any social energy whatsoever.