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The Thinking Space Room Problems

PhoenixRise January 31st, 2016

I really think the thinking space room needs to be shut down or heavily monitored, a lot of people or members in there can be rude, abusive, sexual and many more things I won't go into. It is not helping 7 cups spread positivity or support at all. Please do something about it, thanks.

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VillianByChoice5 February 10th, 2016

its pretty funny how much people are willing to let the best and HAPPIEST chatroom die off. and you mods are being SOO biased, its kinda scary? like, i had no idea this was a oligarchy :/

to say that what we do it not "within the rules" is total bs cause we go on there to have fun and be weird. something we cant do out in the real world cause we are too shy or really depressed. soooooooo, i hope you feel better with yourselves by killing off a place that is actually helping people make friends and feel good about themseleves. but tbh its triggering as hell :)

2 replies
kailee316 February 10th, 2016

@VillianByChoice5

1 reply
kailee316 February 10th, 2016

@kailee316
​-_- Anyway, that post is 10/10

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W3llThatSettlesIt February 10th, 2016

I recommend you take a look at the psychology behind group dynamics. It's imminent that any socially functioning crowd tends to associate with a certain dynamics which resonates with their common dissonance towards intergroups. TS is neither an exception nor is it the only paradigm as it is being subjected by the rest of the site. Each room on this site has its own intragroup synergy and a strong behavior modification as they get deeply engulfed and comfortable with their group that it's psychologically numbing to associate with the other groups.

I am a TS regular. TS is my home. I have a strong affinity towards each of its members. What's more absurd than being accused by the entire site is how none of the TS regulars have ever stepped into another room complaining on their functioning. Neither have we ever whined on and on about how unfair the other groups are coz it doesn't resonate with our thoughts. We just don't care to go beyond our boundaries to make you uncomfortable like you've been exploiting us. We do not complain how dysfunctional each of the other groups are, so have some respect and reciprocate the same towards us.

And also to all those who complain about being rebuffed and alienated as an "outsider", let me enlighten you the semantics of socio-psychological bond within any group. It's always easy to adhere to an emerging group than one that is entrenched. TS is an entrenched group. To get yourself acquainted, you need to observe, resonate and then attach. Understand how open and closed off the group is, make initial attempts to contact, if there's nothing in it that you like, just leave it. It's also ignorant to how you speculate a particular type of coping mechanism to be acceptable and anything other than the ordinary as delinquent. And I'm beyond proud how none of this bashing has belittled any of the TS members. You're just making us stronger and popular. Thanks :)

2 replies
greenFig1623 October 7th, 2016

@W3llThatSettlesIt - Deep af! You go Gwen Colo!

Hydr0ponicus November 7th, 2016

@W3llThatSettlesIt

nice speech, but the truth is... you kids in TS refuse to allow newcomers to be part of the group... you like to ignore them and treat them like an abandoned animal left out in the cold... you talk about respect? not one of the members in that room have respect...

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NadineH February 10th, 2016

I love this, and I love the fact that you all are showing exactly what TS is about, and fighting for it, fighting for the great times you spend there and I'm glad to say that I'm part of it and I enjoy it there!

The fact that you all show the true colors of what it is there and you are embracing it.. I'm so proud of you all guys! Even if we all lose it sometimes and things get our of hand we manage to stay clear, yes there is troubles caused but that doesn't mean that TS has to be singled out.

Yes a lot of wrong things happened and sometimes mistakes happen but that doesn't mean that it should be shut down completely, I like how there is a course taken to be able to come there, even if some disagree, this made it easier for everyone, who want to join is, is very welcome to take the course and join us all, if not I'm sad you feel that way but you have so many other rooms to fit in if you don't see, to like TS or have a problem with it..

Even if the members did disagree on the fact that there is a course to take, most of the regulars did take the test, because they love it there and they treat it like home and you can't just give up on that, so even though they didn't like it, they did it, and that just shows how much this room is important to them.

I know a lot of you have always may have countered some problems in TS but it's changing and you should put all this emotions aside and give it another chance or move on..

2 replies
NadineH February 10th, 2016

@NadineH so many typos lol, I want to also add that the fact that the rooms now available for members who took the course and mods only didn't stop our lovely regular listeners from giving up and finding another room. Instead they all switched to members just for the sake of the room. All what is happening really did make all the regulars come together and fight for it, and I'm so glad you all did <3

November 7th, 2016

@NadineH great post, I agree.

I noticed you said: "Yes a lot of wrong things happened and sometimes mistakes happen but that doesn't mean that it should be shut down completely."

^^^that has happened in every room!! 😀 Should they all be shut down? Should future rooms be shut down before they open, to uh, protect people?

Here's to embracing diversity and human nature. 😀

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VillianByChoice5 February 11th, 2016

.~. stop following me. it makes me feel unsafe.

ShyMap840 February 11th, 2016

Hi everyone,

This is turning into a very heated debate. It is interesting to see all the differing opinions.

Thinking space is a good place to have discussions on various issues. We ve had some lovely discussions held by the moderators of thinking space about current affairs ethics and hobbies. The moderators sometimes hold quizzes in there too. Everyone is always welcome in thinking space. Please remember that everyone is entitled to have an opinion and it's important to respect everyone s opinion.

13 replies
House2011 February 11th, 2016

@ShyMap840

Unless your opinion goes against the mods'/admins'/random trolls' opinion. If it does then you're an awful person who needs to pass a compassion test and never speak of things you care about, and might need support for, again.

12 replies
KrinkTheMellowUnicorn February 12th, 2016

@House2011 - I get that you're feeling hurt and attacked but I feel like this way of complaining about it doesn't get us any closer to a solution, but instead tends to prolong or increase polarization.

conflict by itself is dramatic but it's not very constructive. instead of framing things in terms of how terrible and unfair they are and sort of loosely assuming people have bad motives and are against you, imagine if we got past that and looked for common interests and new ways to get more people what they want?

10 replies
House2011 February 12th, 2016

@KrinkTheMellowUnicorn

Do i need to be more dramatic, is that the problem? There's not really any solution to be had in this, same as there was no real problem to begin with.

9 replies
KrinkTheMellowUnicorn February 12th, 2016

@House2011 - less drama would be better :)

i feel like we're getting somewhere. for you, there was no problem before. any complaints & any changes in rules etc to deal with a problem is therefore a bad idea, adn the actual problem. Is that a fair restatement of how you see it?

I don't want to dismiss alternate views out of hand. I'd really like to get differing interpretations of the same place out in the open to be understood better and discussed fairly.

Is there a way to bring out how what other people have seen as problems, how you think they are arising and could be handled better WITHOUT making it about individuals and what they did or didn't imply in some earlier exchange?

8 replies
House2011 February 12th, 2016

@KrinkTheMellowUnicorn

That's exactly what was said over a week ago, very politely and calmly, by various ts regulars.

There's not really much else to be discussed honestly. You've made your decisions, you implemented your test for whatever purpose it was meant to serve, what else is there to be done at this point, besides just closing the room down entirely?

7 replies
KrinkTheMellowUnicorn February 12th, 2016

@House2011 - i think it's fair to say that your perspective hasn't gotten a fair shake but that's partly because it doesn't really explain the perceived problem except to say there is no problem.

i'm asking for a look at what is going on, from your point of view. any rule can be changed or evolved, etc. of course. this is all a work in progress.

but if there are two different, incompatible, views of what is going on we need to spell them both out and figure out what is possible.

6 replies
House2011 February 12th, 2016

@KrinkTheMellowUnicorn

We described the dynamics rather well I'd say, early on in this thread. Those thoughts seem to have been met with nothing more than to say a problem is perceived, even with no actual claims besides calling the room negative and rude, and so something must be done, and something was done. What effect that action had i don't know since i haven't been in the room since, but i can't see it having done anything but keep new people out so they can't complain.

5 replies
KrinkTheMellowUnicorn February 12th, 2016

@House2011 - I think things we partly spelled out but if there is basic disagreement ("there is a problem" vs "no, there is no problem") then we need to explore further to find the commonality.

I hope you get back into the room soon and that we can find a way forward that preserves the unique value of the TS room while also making it less troublesome for those who find it hard to deal with.

4 replies
Versatchy February 13th, 2016

@KrinkTheMellowUnicorn

Do not complain about people like me.
I will take you to forums, and group chats, and self help guides, and upvote you in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without thinking about me like blood in your mouth.
I will upvote you in the most beautiful way possible. And when I leave you will finally understand, why hurricanes are named after people.

3 replies
KrinkTheMellowUnicorn February 13th, 2016

@Versatchy - charming but I'm off this weekend

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WilleZurMacht February 12th, 2016

What I find sad is:

1. There isn't any proof that there is a serious problem or a serious problem that is unique to Thinking Space. I'm not saying there isn't a problem, but it's just not clear yet.

2. The causes of all the phenomena that could occur in Thinking Space have been discussed with some explainations I think seeming to be pretty clear and unchallenged so far.

3. Reasonable solutions have been given and bad solutions have been ridiculed.

4. A weird solution was used that doesn't make much sense, a compassion test and no access for listeners.

5. @Laura @Heather @Glen haven't said anything. They haven't given any thoughts on what they think is happening in Thinking Space, if they see a problem, haven't put forth evidence for a problem, haven't given any thoughts about what could be a solution. They haven't even released the results of the survey they did about what people wanted Thinking Space to be about, in terms of intellectual discussions vs. casual chat.

I don't believe in democracy either, but I find it a bit lame to make people think it's a democracy, ask for their input, and then do the complete opposite. At this point I don't see why we should continue this thread, or any thread in which they ask for feedback or solutions, except just for fun.

ReliableJarAnonyCat February 23rd, 2016

Okay, it's been 11 days since the last post I believe, but I still felt the need to give my input, as I have a strong (and radical, seeing the opinions here) opinion about this matter.

Returning to 7Cups, I had a very impartial, unprejudiced opinion about the group chats of 7Cups. Never had I ever been in a group chat on the adult side before, but it seemed nice enough.
First thing; every chatroom has a community. That's psychologically logical behaviour; Of course people tend to stick together when they have problems that have similar grounds and experiences. Some chatrooms are harder to fit in with - others are much easier. This is based on your character, whatever you are dealing with and... Practically everything.

Anyway, back to the point. I checked around for a bit, but finally found a connection in Thinking Space. In this moment of time, I want to remind everyone that I was a newcomer, without any connection to members that were 'regulars' or anything. More than in the other chatrooms, I found a nice conversation that took my mind off of things. To put it in a more compact conclusion: in Thinking Space I found exactly that what I was looking for. People with a sense of sarcastic comedy and chatter that could both be laughable and serious at the same time.

Quickly after that, Thinking Space dissapeared from my chatroomlist and I asked around where it went. In other chatrooms I did not find the sense of compassion mixed with mockery that I liked so very much.
In addition, I often found that the cliques were very tight and I barely got answers to my questions. This, I found important to say, because many of problematics stated above, are not Thinking-Space-horros only.

Anyway, the compassion test was... Okay to do. It was hard to find for someone who had just joined the renovated site, but I passed and got back into 'the game'.

From now on, I'm doing my best not to fall into cheesy cliché's, but here I go. The people in Thinking Space are some of the funniest people I've met and sincerely made me laugh out loud. I get that it's not for everyone though - the humour can be dark as the night sky and the subject can be a little controversial. But overall the crowd is nice and also to me, 'the newcomer'.
It hasn't been months or something - I think I joined about three weeks ago - and I don't even feel like 'the newcomer' anymore. That air is absent, although I do think that's common for chat rooms as the internet tends to move fast.
What I mean with this, is that the 'abusive, unsupportive and harrassing behaviour' seems kind of overdone.

Why does it not seem so to me, and very much so to some others? I can't think of a proper reason, really. But in the same way I can't imagine seeing someone being 'bullied' away. It's not that I don't believe that people had negative responses in that room and might even have felt harrassed, but today, I can barely imagine it.
Although the chat does tend to move quickly sometimes; at busy hours it's chaotic and some newcomers don't get greeted in the rush of it all.

Lately, people talked how it was a shame that there were so little new people in the room. It's fun to get to know more people that have similar interests and likings, but the compassion test sets the bar high as it already has this reputation.
Not that I'm fundamentally against the compassion test, it's just that in my opinion, it also makes this room an exclusion.

Furthermore, about the discussions. It's true that there aren't often any 'intellectual discussions'. But many take it very far and say that serious conversation is impossible. Here, I take an obvious stance on the other side of the line. Serious conversation does happen, but less than in other rooms that are based on fighting depression, anxiety and other subjects.
To make it even more radical: twice, I have asked people what their opinions were on very exceptional matters. It wasn't bad, but I suppose it couldn't have been spoken about in other chatrooms. In Thinking Space, my points were considered and answered to in a serious way.

About the moderators: I agree with what someone said just up here. You have moderators that mix in the conversations and clearly show respect for the individual members and you have moderators who watch and mute whenever is needed. Not to attack anyone, it's an observation without opinion. Of course both ways have their qualities and flaws and with this in mind, I think extra monitoring wouldn't do any good to either parties. Members would (I think) become rather aggravated with this disrespect, moderators would have to deal with unnecessary resistance.

Furthermore, and I don't mean to be aggressive, I find it very hard to see how others think they deserve respect when they go around calling people 'viruses'. How they can call a group poisonous and then expect to not have reactions that go against them. Not even harrassing reactions, but reactions that clearly disagree. No one likes to be called that way and I think it's very foreign that it's used in a discussion.
There are reactions that I find unprofessional, unneeded, overly rude and downright childish and that's just as ''bad'' as how people claim Thinking Space to be.

You might find my opinion too subjective and very unstable because of that, but hating the room is the same. One has seen the other, negative end of Thinking Space, but I have seen mostly good. In this thread, I think it's not needless to add my experiences to the equation. It's easy to burn something down, after all.
It may not have been the most useful anecdote and I probably will remember tons of things I forgot to say in a few minutes, but here is a baseground.

Now I'm going to sleep, as it's about 2AM - I beforehand apologize for any grammar mistakes as I'm not native and very sleepy, but I felt the need to say this. Hope it helps.


So good night everyone, hope you folks dream well.

2 replies
Eunoia February 23rd, 2016

@ReliableJarAnonyCat

Thanks for sharing your experience:)

mscoxie February 26th, 2016

@ReliableJarAnonyCat Thank you very much for your input! It's much appreciated! :)

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March 5th, 2016

I've been in TS maybe twice -- once or twice when it was unoccupied, then again after taking the Compassion Course, where I rode the wild merry-go-round ride that it is! It lifted my spirits being in there, and when i gather more courage (for I'm a slow typist) I'll go back! :D It sure beats the usually low energy of the Depression rooms for lifting spirits with high energy. I totally get why people polarize over what goes on in the room. Either you love or hate it. You can't remain indifferent. It's keep up or get ignored; join in or get left behind. Really the same thing as in other rooms, just at a faster pace, if we are honest about how the chat rooms really work. I think modding is necessary there, but not strict repressive modding. How do you mod maenads and madmen having a blast? And really, why would you? But why not rename it? Maybe Blinking Space. Or Bouncing Space. Or Outer Space, etc. Or ask the TSers to rename themselves. Let them be who they are, and let all of us who wish to join in, or join them as a regular, do so. Make another room for thoughtful, intellectual convos. Such is my two cents. :) Thanks.

1 reply
kindofblue March 6th, 2016

@redKite4725 - makes a lot of sense to me.

would there be any harm to this?

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Teriaankhonkinamkeenmastiyan November 28th, 2016

hi

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