Grief people

I want to say that loneliness is huge. It is huge. No one can tell you it is not because you know you know that it is you know it. I know it too, and grief is also unlimited just like in the other emotional while feeling or respect in our lives and It’s not like you still grief or just there’s like it is well long-term I mean lifelong because you carry them in your heart, but like it can hit you you know it can just come that time or season or day and it’s back same happened with me as this week started because also the pain and really Physically I just feel like very it’s been a lot and it’s still a lot on me then there is loneliness, and there is the emotional aspect that is also a lot so you just gotta restore and be more like you know back to your shape or have you used to be because now I’m in bed I’m in bed because like one day of pain it can just like everything take you then you have a hard time eaten all of that drink, but it’s very important to get back to it but you’re still like tired. You know that’s what I mean and this week when the grief came it came because I was actually searching for The most detailed version of how it all happened and I started to imagine it the go and everything it was just huge so I went with that to ask in therapy online well but like I said that I go there to ask you know virtually and or remotely and basically it can be like a wisher trauma, which is like even if you didn’t witness it, but as someone who I can imagine it or put myself in their shoes, I like as I was reading the storyline of the real event, the real crash event I knew and so you know how devastating that isn’t scary and everything so I was afraid, but I didn’t have any bad dream I was able to process it but today it felt very heavy. I was outside and it just felt like a heavy emotional package because it’s something it’s more than just sadness. It’s something very big we carry in us and where are you look at the sky today was cloud watching venting or you just talk to the god or anything or to anyone because this is my secret like won’t no one knows this because these people deceased that left last year but I only know about it this year so to me it’s bigger difference really big difference And I found your account you know and everything looks to us if they’ve been there or still are so like I come to back when I’m sad or something I come to look at it again whatever helps you and so that’s the reason why today it was hard again and why I failed it This match and I just felt some comforting from these two people from the sky, so let’s say that heavens or God bless me there’s a complexity, but these people didn’t know me only I know them, but I’m grateful that I know them even if I never heard them. I was able to see them because they are my cousin’s Cousins. They are cousins of my cousin, but I really only know them from this year so it’s been a year since that accident and it happened in the car. I mean it is devastating. It is disheartening because they’re not here physically I think that’s the biggest loss. We feel right they’re not here too. See us listen to us. This is life and we. We still don’t know like where they are or if they transform into something or if that energy is something else I sometimes thing you know thinking be now some beautiful flower somewhere and we don’t know about it, but this is the reason I should always allow yourself to grief because these people have life like they really liked I mean, they were very social uplifting people they love parties actually they were coming early in the morning from one end One person that was their driver was going very very fast fast faster in order. I don’t think they were responsible, but it happened. I saw on caption where they had like right or wrong. They don’t care. They just wanted to go with the flow of life I mean what is deeply saddening is that they were just 20 and 22 year-old last year so basically very young souls very like young beautiful souls that have left us in me but I know I mean people want us to be happy. I know they would want me to be happy, proud I basically have the same thinking, but we should always allow ourselves to grief. You can grieve today tomorrow next Friday next month next year but you do you always do it doesn’t have any limited time or space because if then you can say the same about Lau about sadness about anything else and wouldn’t make sense no it wouldn’t. You should always allow yourself to grieve grieve as much as you need or want in that time and moment I had this one experience with a friend and people. I just want to tell you well tell anyone I’m telling you this here you as if you’re reading my diary for this moment one time I was telling one person that we’re no longer friends because it didn’t work out, but I was telling them you know that I just got very sad and suddenly I started to missing grandma. In this case. It was grandma. You know the one that passed when I was a little kid when I was young myself very young and small and basically you know the I feel dismissed like if I shouldn’t look at the past or stick with that creep like I should do something with my life and go and move on. Well that’s not absolutely wrong but you can’t deny the emotions you feel you must feel it. It’s OK to return to the past to bring the person back again. It means that we think of them they made it to us and we carried them. All we carry with them. We walk still with them. It’s so beautiful but if we pull our taught that and they think that it is limited time for grieving for any waving that is wrong that is entirely wrong. There is no limit to anyone who read this to the end. Thank you so much. If something resonates we can talk about it and this is what grief means to me. 🫶🏻💭❣️