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How self-compassionate are you?

OliviaButler December 16th, 2014

We all know the golden rule: reciprocity. But what if we view others far more kindlythan we view ourselves? Self-compassion ? treating ourselves to the same compassion we hold for others ? is one way to counter excessive self-criticism, due to low self-esteem or perfectionist tendencies. You can test your self-compassion here.

I test as moderately self-compassionate, and that makes sense to me. I'm (eventually) pretty forgiving to myself, my score shows, but while I understand others share the struggles that I do, I still tend to let myself feel isolated.

How do you score? In what ways are you most self-compassionate, and where do you have room to be kinder to yourself? How might you practice that?

51
mscoxie August 20th, 2015

I used to be quite the opposite of self-compassionate.....it took a while to get to the point where i could even accept myself...being here on 7cups has pushed me even further because of the self-care they promote....I love it!! :)

KrinkTheMellowUnicorn August 20th, 2015

I guess I'm somewhere in the middle:

Self-Kindness: 2.60
Self-Judgment: 3.60
Common Humanity: 3.00
Isolation: 2.00
Mindfulness: 3.00
Over-Identification: 3.00
Overall score: 3.00

I think I've learned to become more compassionate toward myself (and more patient and accepting) over time.

Celaeno August 27th, 2015

Self-Kindness: 3.40
Self-Judgment: 3.40
Common Humanity: 4.25
Isolation: 4.75
Mindfulness: 3.50
Over-Identification: 3.25
Overall score: 2.96

So I'm moderate in self-compassion in general, but still has pretty high scores in self-judgment, isolation, and over-identification section, which show me I still have work to do on this subject.

Do you have maybe some tips how could I start to work on improving my skills related to isolation? It's my highest score, which worries me a bit, and I'd like to start from here.

bleubellejune September 1st, 2015

Self-Kindness: 2.20
Self-Judgment: 4.00
Common Humanity: 1.75
Isolation: 3.75
Mindfulness: 2.25
Over-Identification: 2.50
Overall score: 2.32

Almost moderate, but still low. I expected as much.

SillyBlue32 February 14th, 2017

Self-Kindness: 2.80

Self-Judgment: 3.40

Common Humanity: 3.00

Isolation: 4.75

Mindfulness: 2.75

Over-Identification: 3.50

Overall score: 2.48

Izzyisnotgood February 14th, 2017

Overall 1.84 didnt expect it to be very high..... I tend to save all my compassion for others

elliotjay123 February 14th, 2017

Self-Kindness: 3.00
Self-Judgment: 3.80
Common Humanity: 2.50
Isolation: 4.75
Mindfulness: 4.00
Over-Identification: 4.75
Overall score: 2.37

AngelsDontExist February 14th, 2017

Self-Kindness: 1.80

Self-Judgment: 4.00

Common Humanity: 2.75

Isolation: 4.00

Mindfulness: 3.00

Over-Identification: 3.75

Overall score: 2.30

calmZebra60 February 14th, 2017

Self-Kindness: 4.20
Self-Judgment: 2.20
Common Humanity: 4.50
Isolation: 2.75
Mindfulness: 4.00
Over-Identification: 2.75
Overall score: 3.83

1 reply
themainjane February 15th, 2017

@calmZebra60

These seem like pretty good scores. Something for me to strive towards. Seems you dont over-isolate or over-judge yourself and you have realistic and healthy expectations of others and a compassion for them. Also way to go on mindfulness! :)

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themainjane February 15th, 2017

Took it twice because I couldnt believe I was an "over-identifier" or lacking in acknowledgement regarding common humanity. :/ Not sure that's how that works since my next attempt rendered me even more on the "over-identification" but hey, my common humanity score went up a bit. :)

Room for improvement. Going to check out the link!

Test 1

Self-Kindness: 1.60
Self-Judgment: 4.80
Common Humanity: 2.00
Isolation: 4.25
Mindfulness: 1.50
Over-Identification: 4.00
Overall score: 1.68

Test 2

Self-Kindness: 2.20
Self-Judgment: 4.20
Common Humanity: 3.25
Isolation: 4.75
Mindfulness: 2.75
Over-Identification: 4.25
Overall score: 2.17

4 replies
Kimmymum May 9th, 2018

@themainjane. What is this? A test? Im new here and this seems like something I could benefit from. Thank you

1 reply
themainjane May 9th, 2018

@Kimmymum

Yes, it

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themainjane July 13th, 2018

They should supply definitions to these words.

seems common humanity is how much you feel what you go thru is a universal thing. Meaning others have been/go through what you go thru. I think.

over-identification... still a lil fuzzy. Either I overidentify with problems I don

themainjane October 16th, 2018

@themainjane

Good to check back in and see if I

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