Honesty and Positivity
Hi everyone,
Good morning/evening/afternoon/night
You maybe asking yourself how can one be honest and positive at the same time is that possible for anyone?
We do not associate being honest with the connotation of gentleness.
We can find gentleness to be an ability to be softer version of "thanks but no thanks",
*Has there ever been a time where you have been honest with someone ? Think of the time it went well, what do you notice versus the time it did not go well?
*Has there ever been a time where someone has been honest with you? Think of the time it went well, what do you notice versus the time it did not go well?
*Rare and weird as it is to say, did you feel a sense of gratitude for a persons honesty whether it be something you are insecure about or not at all? Lets say if someone commented asked "Did you lose weight?," you may mind that comment being a person who struggles with their body image
We all at some point will appreciate and not appreciate honesty. We can feel attacked or we can give honesty that much needed push to help us grow and spark challenge in a way that is loving and caring. Afterall we can be grateful that we have learnt somethign new about ourself. Honesty works when there is care and love behind it. You need to get in touch with the inner child.
Intention and motivation is the key. Intention and motivation asks what in the internal monologue emotions, thoughts, past experiences behind why I am saying this? Could I feel motivated in this way of honesty? Would I feel disempowered in that way of honesty?
When you are honest the positive thing is you are likely to be with people who match your values. Honesty can feel like standing tall like a tree, letting whichever fruits grow in your life grow (e.g. relationships, trust) and letting whichever fruits which are not needed in your life rot (e.g. a love for materialism, accolades). It can feel like sliding into whatever life has to offer you.
Open to thoughts and feelings
How do you see honesty? Has is served you well? Do you feel there have been ways honesty has not served you well?
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Welcome to tag others who maybe interested
A lot of times a change of tone can completely make a big difference. But there was a particular instance recently when someone actually was honest and told me that they know that nothing they could say would make me feel better. And that made me feel so much more appreciative than all the people who were genuinely trying to say comforting things. Those things really made it worse.
@GoldenRuleJG great post and discussion
Honesty to me is a core value I hold. I feel honest communication prevents many conflicts in our lives. I think honesty should always take precedence since if fail to use it, we might end up spending so much energy covering up for dishonesty.
Being honest to ourselves is also very important. It keeps us on our paths and helps us grow.
@GoldenRuleJG
How do you see honesty? Has is served you well? Do you feel there have been ways honesty has not served you well?
I see honesty like a glass bowl. It's fragile and clear. If I put cookies in a glass bowl I can clearly see that there's cookies inside. It's not a guessing game, which I feel like a lot of interactions with people seem to be. Are they mad at me? Did I say something wrong? Are they being sarcastic? People say stuff to like indicate what they mean and that's a whole thing.
When people are honest it serves me pretty well. Then I can act or answer accordingly. If someone's upset or needs space to think I'll make sure to give them time or do my best to be there in the way they need.
And obviously honesty can hurt sometimes. I've had people who I thought were my friends and then they were like ew no we're not your friends. That hurt and then they went on to list the reasons why they would not be my friend. However, if I had to like pick to be told only the truth or not I'd have to pick the ladder. Brutal honesty may hurt but it can also help. On one hand did it hurt when I found out they weren't my actual friends but on the other hand I am glad our "friendship" ended because it was quite toxic.
@JollyRacher I enjoyed reading what you wrote (the analogy of the cookie jar is terrific! - it made my feel a range of emotions, the wheel of emotions you can be going through when it comes to friendships and interactions. On one hand you want to accept your authenticity and show it. I love that you are appreciative of others needing time - for me this is a very admirable quality. 😊 I can really hear a sense of gratitude that yes some people have not seen me the way I felt they had (they did not really consider me a friend) but this can mean ok I've got that peace of mind that the truth is out although it hurts.
Communication will always be a two way street - sometimes honesty and softness (You'll not yell at a kid if they don't get a maths equation but honesty and gently explaining what they are doing well and what can make it better) is a good match other times assertiveness and honesty is (say someone is in danger)
Thank you for joining in - any hurt that is raw it too shall pass. Jolly knowing what you find difficult is good because that widens the horizon of self-awareness - you care to look at yourself! Please take care. God bless you all <3 🙏