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I sincerely wish... she will fight for her rights!

NewbWanderer November 17th

Your Silence, My Voice


In your silence lie countless screams,

I hear those unspoken pleas of yours.

You ask me to stay away, to forget you entirely,

But how can I erase the dreams we shared together?


You say that fear grips your heart,

I say we'll fight this battle as one.

Why fight alone for your freedom?

Didn't I promise to walk beside you till the end?


Is love such a grave sin?

Is choosing our own path such a crime?

Your God gave you this life to live,

Why surrender it to others' design?


You ask for time, and I give you

Not moments, but a lifetime true.

Just don't ask me to forget you,

For you're like a verse in my book of life,

That feels new every time I read through.


People tell me to be practical,

To accept that if not you, someone else will do.

But how do I make them understand

That you're not a choice I made,

You're a part of my existence so deep,

A story left incomplete I cannot keep.


I hold no grudge against your family,

I only have this humble plea:

Give you time, listen to your voice,

Find their joy in your happiness freely.


You say my hopes are breaking you down,

But how can I leave you alone in this fight?

My silence holds my restlessness,

Your silence holds your helplessness.


The tears that fill your eyes today,

Flow from mine just the same way.

You ask me to forget and move on,

But how can I forget dreams that we dwelt upon?


This world holds endless possibilities,

Why chain ourselves to age-old traditions?

Your Allah and the world I see,

Both speak of truths that set us free.


I wonder at this painful irony:

The women who once lived in chains,

Now become the keepers of the same,

Passing down their silent pain.

What did our elders learn from their youth,

When their voices too were stifled and mute?

Are they now taking revenge, perhaps,

By passing trauma down this twisted route?


I think of your daughters tomorrow,

Will they find their voice to speak?

Or will they inherit this same silence,

When they try to choose their path unique?

Will their rational pleas be heard

Or will they too be told to stay meek?


You'll fight your battle alone, you say,

I'll stay away as you asked, okay.

But remember, I'm here somewhere near,

Ready for your call, should you ever need.


I only ask this much of you:

Don't let your voice fade away.

For hidden in your silence deep,

Lies the story of my heartache's keep.

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Heather225 November 18th

@NewbWanderer

the rhyming flows so nicely! what a fun read

1 reply
NewbWanderer OP November 19th

@Heather225
thank you for taking the time to read! May I ask what would you have done if you were in my place? If the context isn't clear, I will try to elaborate a little! 

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fearlessEast3586 November 19th

Hi NewbWanderer,


Your poem was full of heart. As I read it I thought of my younger self. I pictured a person who loves very passionately and deeply. Now I try to give myself the type of unconditional love I gave to others in the past who didn't give it back. You have inspired me to write a love poem to myself.

1 reply
NewbWanderer OP November 19th

@fearlessEast3586
Hello, I am sorry for your experiences. I think I may feel what you went through even if we have our unique experiences. I don't have much to say, but learning that you are about to write yourself a love poem, I smiled. You are stronger than me! Take care!

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fearlessEast3586 November 20th

Hi NewbWanderer,


I think you have a lot of strength! You shared a part of your soul's journey so honestly here. I don't need details I can clearly see that and that takes a lot of strength. I think you have what it takes.


But I unfortunately didn't start trying to love myself when I was strong but at my weakest point. After a lot of pain and negative from others. I felt weak like if I had spent years battling with the wind.


I wrote a list of things I wanted in a person and I realized I didn't have some of the qualities I was expecting from my partner. So I thought if I can't like or love me how can I expect another person to.


After a time of self hatred I decided to start by identifying the things I could tolerate about myself and I would repeat those things daily. At first I felt like I was lying to myself and it felt stupid to do that. After a while I could find things I liked about myself and repeat it daily. Then I started to actually see things I loved about myself but it's been hard to say those things out loud almost like if I don't deserve my own love.


It's gotten easier to love myself and it is not the same as being full of one's self. It's still a work in progress but after giving away my precious beautiful love to people who didn't appreciate it ...it feels pretty good to give my precious beautiful love to me because I do deserve it :)


I don't know how to start writing my love poem to myself though.


Do you have any tips?

3 replies
NewbWanderer OP Thursday

@fearlessEast3586

Apologies for the delayed response. I found your thoughts deeply engaging. I once came across a notion that resonated with me: you begin to learn how to love yourself only after experiencing love from others. Perhaps that’s the influence of being social creatures. As long as we exist within society and don’t retreat to solitude in the wilderness, we seem to hold on to some kind of hope. I might be wrong, of course, and I welcome your perspective.

Now, about writing yourself a love poem (though I am no expert) what if you imagined someone faceless but carrying the qualities you hold dear? Let them take the lead, filling in the words and guiding your hand as you craft a poem that brings comfort and warmth to your soul. Allow them to shape the verses at their own pace, without pressure to complete it all at once.

Someday, when their first draft emerges, you will know if it truly speaks to your heart. Does this idea feel meaningful to you?

2 replies

Your tips on writing are very useful. I will definitely be trying to take your advice.


Of course society, family, friends etc "teach" us how to love ourselves. For me I learnt to follow rules, traditions and to love and respect others but I don't remember learning anything about loving myself. Maybe that is a pretty common experience for a lot of people. I think more often than not the love I experienced from others taught me what I don't want rather than what I want. But I also realized that I can't be upset if those traditions or rules work for other people or if they don't really "work" for them but they dare not change them. I can't be mad at people who are on different paths of the same journey as me.


I think the most valuable thing I learnt about relationships was from a dear friend who told me relationships (not just romantic but all) are like a game of tennis. One person serves the ball and the other person hits it back. If the other person doesn't hit the ball back, can you call that tennis?


Similarly in a relationship a person could end up doing and giving so much that they maybe in a relationship with just themselves and the other person is not taking part. Can you then call that a relationship?


I don't have the power or ability to change others or society or traditions.


But I have had some success with changing what I can ...which is myself. I didnt need to retreat to solitude in the wilderness to do that but I do have to self refelct often and it is the most difficult part of my life's journey so far but at least for me it's also been the most rewarding.

1 reply
NewbWanderer OP Friday

@fearlessEast3586 Ahoy!

First of all, I’m glad you found the idea of penning the poem helpful. I can relate to so much of what you said. Love, affection, infatuation, attachment... there are so many shades to these emotions. Honestly, I don’t always try to distinguish between them - it feels like such a daunting task. Maybe that’s why I’ve been misled at times. It’s not always easy to find the fine line separating these feelings.

I’ve also spent time around people just because they made me feel good for a while. Sometimes, the deeper intent mattered more than the moment itself. Is love the space (or the condition) where two souls can simply be themselves without losing too much of who they are? Maybe, or maybe not. I’ve swayed between being deeply emotional and keeping my composure, so I’ve had my fair share of experiences. No major complaints there. But if I’m honest, I think my attachment style plays a role in the confusion. What stings most are the unanswered questions - the lies or absurdities I couldn’t make sense of. Sometimes, I wish I had better closure, but it’s alright. Better luck next time, as they say! By the way, I really liked your tennis analogy - it’s such a simple yet profound way to look at relationships. But sometimes, doesn’t it become difficult to decide when to stop serving and hitting the ball back all by yourself, especially in those initial moments? And later, maybe we get so accustomed to this newer version of the game that we keep calling it tennis, just to avoid puncturing the bubble. After all, there’s always this idea floating around - that not every opponent in tennis plays the same way. So, we’re often told to think from their perspective too, aren’t we?

As for self-reflection, it’s definitely not an easy process. I try to learn, to be more mindful and careful each time, but sometimes I wonder if it’s my own approach getting in the way, or if it’s something else I haven’t uncovered yet.

Okay, enough... I hope you’re doing well. Wishing you a good day - or night!

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azurePond Thursday

@NewbWanderer This poem really hits deep. The way it explores love, pain, and the struggle for freedom is incredibly moving. It captures the quiet desperation of holding on to someone who is an essential part of you, even when circumstances try to tear you apart. There's something so poignant about the idea of fighting for someone else's voice when your own is at risk of being silenced. It’s a powerful reminder of the struggles we face in love, family, and society.

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NewbWanderer OP Thursday

@azurePond

Thank you for taking the time to read my thoughts and share yours. You’ve summarized everything so well. I can’t help but wonder - am I the one failing to see the bigger picture, or is it others? Maybe it’s me, and if it is, I can accept that. But still, what good comes from dividing us in the name of preserving "purity"? Is humanity not meant to be our true faith, above all else?

Why is it that I can’t see the "future" that others insist is so clear? Correlation doesn’t imply causation, and I agree. But have we tried to explore these ideas separately? I doubt it.

Maybe none of this makes sense, and I’m just rambling. I’m sorry - I’m just trying to make sense of what I feel. Thank you, truly, for taking the time to leave your comment. It means a lot.

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azurePond Thursday

@NewbWanderer I don’t know the whole story, but I get where you’re coming from. It’s tough when people seem so sure about their view of the future, but it doesn’t always add up, does it? The future isn’t set in stone. There are multiple versions of the future happening right now. Maybe the future they see isn’t the same as what you see because you don’t see the same possibilities, and they don’t see the ones you do. Doesn’t mean either side’s wrong or right. It might sound like a cop-out, but it’s true. If any of the variables in those possibilities changed drastically, then we could say one future has a higher chance of happening. Am I making sense?

You’ve got a point about dividing over "purity" — surely, humanity should be our main focus, not splitting up over stuff that doesn’t really matter in the end. Maybe we haven’t looked at it from all angles, or maybe we just need to listen to each other more. Either way, I respect you for thinking this through. Don’t apologise for sharing your thoughts.

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NewbWanderer OP Thursday

@azurePond

You’ve addressed each of my thoughts so thoroughly—thank you for paying such close attention to the details. As for whether it adds up, for me, it doesn’t. I’m someone who’s rarely certain or confident about most things. People have called me diplomatic, fake, or a confused soul, and honestly, I admire their certainty, even when it’s about me.

I agree—we all have unique experiences that shape how we see the world. But as you pointed out, listening to each other is so important. It’s not just about being right; it’s about seeing if the person in front of us is making an honest effort to explain their view or demonstrate their reasoning. That matters.

The idea of multiple futures—or the multiverse, as science might call it—is truly fascinating. What you said feels grounded in our shared reality: that our choices, actions, and even inaction shape the paths ahead. Things rarely go as planned, and that unpredictability is part of what makes life worth living. Halting out of fear or running in the opposite direction doesn’t inspire me either.

I question conventions, not to tear them down, but to understand them. And yet, I’m often asked why I’d dare question these so-called sacred truths. If I were all-powerful, all-knowing, and the creator of everything, why would I have such fragile insecurities about being questioned? Wouldn’t I welcome every curious mind, eager to explore and seek knowledge?

I realise I’ve started rambling again. But honestly, conversations like these are refreshing. Thank you again for taking the time to respond so thoughtfully—it really means a lot. (Did I make any sense, though?)

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azurePond Thursday

@NewbWanderer 

 I think you made perfect sense! It's refreshing to see someone who questions things and thinks so deeply about the world, especially when it comes to understanding others’ perspectives. I get what you're saying about the multiverse, but I wasn’t referring to that when I mentioned multiple futures existing. The idea I had in mind is more like this: Imagine a boy taking a basketball shot, and you and your friend are watching from the sidelines. In this moment, there are multiple possible futures. The boy could make the shot or miss it. Your friend might be sure he’ll make it because she knows he’s a pro player, so that future seems certain to her. But you know he was in the hospital yesterday with a minor injury, so you’re more uncertain about his chances. That’s what I meant by multiple futures—different outcomes based on what each of us knows or believes.

As for your thoughts on fragile insecurities and questioning beliefs, I think you’re onto something important. Some people crave certainty, and even if they love certainty, they might still question things in order to find a better answer and adjust their beliefs. But for others, especially those who've had an uncertain life, that fixed belief is the only thing keeping them grounded. For them, questioning that belief feels like losing their stability. So the bigger question becomes: Do we support these "white lies" that help maintain their sense of certainty? And how far do we let these white lies shape our lives and others’ lives? Is it even a white lie when we're not sure about something ourselves? What if it is the truth and we are merely blin to that possibility? It’s a tricky thing to navigate.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts so openly—it’s honestly been a great exchange or should I say essays! 


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NewbWanderer OP Friday

@azurePond

This exchange feels like a true meeting of minds - thank you for being such an engaging penfriend. It’s rare to find someone so patient and open to exploring ideas. Honestly, I know my constant questioning might be annoying to some, but I can’t help it - it’s how I make sense of things. People like you, who take the time to entertain my thoughts, are gems, truly.

Your idea of multiple futures reminds me of the butterfly effect. Do you think they’re connected? The way small actions or knowledge can cascade into vastly different outcomes feels similar to what you described. It's fascinating how perspectives can shift based on the information we each hold - it’s almost like we’re living in overlapping but slightly divergent realities.

About belief systems, I often wonder how it all started. When basic survival consumes us - when hunger or struggle cloud our minds - there’s little room for creativity. But once our ancestors moved beyond mere survival, they gained the capacity to think, question, and imagine. Maybe during the Neolithic Age or later, they finally had time to ponder the mysteries of existence: What was there before? Was there even a beginning? Those questions sparked philosophies, practices, and eventually belief systems.

It’s natural for humans to seek an origin story - it’s how we make sense of things. Some point to Adam and Eve, others to the Big Bang. Even science, for all its rigour, tied the universe’s beginning to a single event. And yet, as we learn more - like through discoveries with the James Webb Telescope - our theories evolve, and we’re reminded of our limitations. But that’s the beauty of it, isn’t it? Nothing is carved in stone. We keep learning, adapting, and passing on the baton to the next generation to dig deeper. Sometimes, I feel a pang of sadness knowing I won’t live to see humanity uncover more of these truths.

As for the question, “What if it is the truth, and we are merely blind to it?” - absolutely, it’s possible. My knowledge is a tiny droplet in an ocean. But at the same time, I can’t help but feel that the “keepers of truths,” the ones so resistant to questioning, could be a bit more open to exploration. If they weren’t so rigid - if they didn’t discriminate or build barriers in the name of their beliefs - imagine how much more harmonious things could be.

Take love, for instance. Why should connecting with someone you care for be anything but a personal choice? Many will say that when two souls decide to bind themselves together, their families also get tied by the same thread. While that’s true to an extent, it also raises the question - how much are others truly contributing to that bond? Even if both families are "successful," enduring years of emotional suffocation for either of the two souls, even when physical needs are met, feels like far too great a cost.

Everyone nods along and relates to Shayari’s about love and longing, yet in practice, we... 

Whether it’s how one connects to their creator or a loved one, these are deeply individual experiences. Our elders, and even we, as future elders ourselves, should understand this. Let people prove themselves if needed, but don’t keep them apart just because of conventions. Life’s too short for such unnecessary boundaries.

And are emotions overrated? Maybe. Or maybe they’re just misunderstood. I’m not sure, and I find myself rambling again. But thank you for humouring my thoughts and making me feel heard. Conversations like these remind me why I love questioning and sharing ideas.

I hope you’re having a wonderful time on your end - this exchange has truly been a gift. You are under no obligation to reply to such huge chunks of text. I just needed to blabber.

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azurePond Friday

@NewbWanderer 

Wow, thank you for such a thoughtful reply! I totally get the curious mind and blabber thing—I’m guilty of that too!

I love the connection between multiple futures and the butterfly effect. It makes sense that small actions could snowball into different outcomes, like chaos theory suggests. But some might argue the butterfly effect oversimplifies things. Maybe larger forces like societal trends or biology shape many outcomes more than small actions, meaning our futures aren’t as radically divergent as they seem.

About the belief systems - When our ancestors had a break from survival, they began questioning life’s bigger mysteries. Just like we do after a stressful week, they created belief systems to make sense of existence. These origin stories, whether religious or scientific, help us find purpose and understanding. As we make new discoveries, our beliefs evolve too—reminding us that the search for meaning is ongoing, and we can choose to evolve with it.

On love, I agree it’s deeply personal, but also shaped by families and communities. While love should be a personal choice, community support can nurture it, as long as it doesn’t become suffocating. It’s about finding balance, just like in yin and yang or Buddha’s middle path.

And yes, I completely agree with your thoughts on "keepers of truth." It can be so frustrating when people become so rigid in their beliefs and resist change or questioning. It’s like they’ve built walls around their understanding of the world and shut out anything that might challenge it. It would be amazing if there was more space for people to explore new ideas and find common ground, rather than feeling like they have to protect their version of the truth at all costs. But, at the same time, I suppose some of that resistance comes from fear—the fear of losing one’s identity or foundation. It’s a tricky one, isn’t it? The balance between staying open-minded while also holding onto what feels right for you. This echoes the idea of existentialism, where we must find our own truth, while navigating the inherent uncertainty of life.

I believe what makes us human isn’t just the ability to think. It is our consciousness. Consciousness, after all, is about being aware of ourselves and our surroundings. We observe, make logical inferences, and adapt our beliefs accordingly. Reformation, then, is at the heart of what makes us human—it’s what’s brought us from living in caves to where we are now. So, while we stay true to our morals and beliefs, we should remain open to change also. I have anxiety so I know accepting change is not the easiest think out there. Now think about a person who found out their entire belief system is wrong or is undergoing change - So yeah , it is not easy. But always keeping an eye open while blindly following something is what we all need.



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