cant control mysef
i have been angry at my family and friends for a long time now and i cant find the problem .
i feel bad for treating them bad but i feel like they see me as the problem so i always try and defend myself even if they talk to me and give me advise for me to be a better person i dont see it that way
@anonyWheel252 the mind is a tricky one, and our perspectives of what's happening and being said around us, is very different to each person. But anger can be a bad emotion. So please reach out for help for anger issues ❤❤ we are all here for you ❤
@anonyWheel252
When we are angry the best way to fix or process is to identify why... Your post did not say but if you know deal from there...
sometimes we are not angry at the people around us but ourselves and how we are around them. Most often the biggest anger issue is from miscommunication... Do you feel like you can talk with them to define where your anger comes from?
My issues i have been able to work on to overcome is when i step back and see it often is because i did not speak up when they did items that had me angry......... but from their view they do not see it ...
a person who buys food items they like and just assume you do.... people who offer to help but disappear when they are really needed.... people who chose to offer advice on items i never needed or wanted their opinion on....
Find your anger write it down and then try to see it from another view.
@toughTiger6481 i cant seem to figure why i get angry with them but they are all older by 10 years my siblings they think they are my parents they think mom and dad went soft on me so they do there job but in fact my parents yes they spoil me bec they got me when they were old they are wiser now with me and know how to parent me well but my siblings doesnt see it that way they see that i have to be treated like they were years back.. it feels like controlling when i tell mom that she tells me let them parent you they are still young let them learn on u so they have more experience with their kids but where am i in that? they are amazing with every bad they do good but sometimes it feels way too much to have 4 parents
@anonyWheel252
I totally get that some kids when there is a age gap tend to take on advice/ parenting type roles ... i have that in a part of my family as well.
it is unwelcome and not in any way your issue that your parents are more laid back or parenting differently ...I can see where that leads to anger ....as they have zero ground on this issue.
again though you are proving the more mature one in seeing this issue and although you resent the treatment you can chose how to respond
either with anger and disagreement or just a big smile and head nods that convey I am letting you get your fake parent stuff out but none is going to be heeded.
@toughTiger6481 ik they are doing it out of love but im having a hard time accepting it sometimes they say stuff that hurts me and me and my sister arent on good terms bec of that a while back they accused me of being jealous of her bec she got engaged and for a while i thought i was actully jealous of her they convinced me yes i was treating her not the best but it wasnt bec im jealous...i already have a bf but they dont know mom just know he is a friend and i have been keeping it for 2 years now
I think you have a good perspective you are closer to brother try to see his points if he makes suggestions but your relationship with sister is trained from other items. I know you hope it is not true but if her fiance is a bad fit and expressed it in any way she may resent that and fear you may be right.
No matter what people say sometimes siblings are just not that close and it is hard when you try to pretend that you have feelings you do not. .... i have a sister that frankly i do not like . similar reasons.......if i was in a position to decide would i even talk to that person or not ... i would chose NO. That is ok too... being siblings does not give a person the right to treat others poorly and expect they other person must just take it.
i hope sharing and thinking about things you can get some relief in knowing many peopel has sibling issues like this and some find creative ways to get through it as i doubt they will quit trying to lead you or advise you.
@toughTiger6481 tbh yes i feel better knowing i can connect every time i talk to someone they think im crazy for even thinking that about my sibling i will try and find a way it wont be a long one ik after a few months she will move out and just give me more space
there is also another thing i wanna talk about if u have time i feel comfortable talking to u
It’s normal to feel angry. I suggest that you take a break from seeing them for a while so you can clear your mind. Taking your mind off things help you have a clearer mind and be calmer, everyone needs a break sometimes :).