Scared/Hesitant to Try Therapy Again
So I'm not so great at/comfortable with talking about things with anyone, even my journal entries end in me disregarding my feelings and insisting everything's great.
I tried counselling online last year for 5 or 6 sessions, short time I know. The first couple of sessions were productive but I eventually closed up and our sessions were just very expensive check-ins with eating, physical activity, etc. I chose to stop going after a few sessions like that.
I have the opportunity to try in-person therapy but I can't help but feel like it would be a waste of energy and money and will leave me feeling like I have something wrong with me if it doesn't work out again. I don't want to refuse to get help out of fear and have it impact my life, but I can't bring myself to think trying it out would be worth it/successful. Help getting unstuck?
Called in to make the appointment and they won't be able to offer fees I can afford so once again everything's crashing down because of me. I do feel worse than before like I thought I would, I swear I'm just meant to fail and miserable
@Pennn
Money is often one of the biggest obstacle for mental health care. Have you already gone to any social service organizations? Oftentimes they have a pool of resources for problems like these. These organizations are very knowledgeable about little known things that can help a lot. It's how I've been able to afford services.
I'm sorry to hear you feel pained and like a failure. You're really doing your best here. Maybe it didn't go as you planned, but that doesn't equate to failing. It seems common for the early stages to be rough, so you're not alone. For me it's been 5 years and ongoing finding the right service.
Wish you the best of luck. You're doing really well.
@Pennn
Hi there!
There's a book I've been reading on caring for my mental health and how to know if I need help and where to find it.
I'm finding it quite meaningful and it's helping me sort out a lot of things so I can gauge where I am and what I actually need help with. I often freeze and don't have the words to express myself and get totally lost, so this is helping me to put words to how I am actually feeling.
Do you think something like this might be a good resource for you too?
