Dealing with Grief and Relationship Stress
The start of my week was so difficult. Have lots of grief from my dad’s death and my bf giving me the silent treatment.
My father passed away about a month ago. I didn’t have the greatest relationship with him but I recognize he is still my father and I do have love for him. Yesterday was a special day, his 40th day since passing which in my culture is observed. It symbolizes his last day on Earth and the day he goes to the afterlife. On my way home, I ran into my father’s friend in the subway and he didn’t get the news (they lost touch months ago). He was so shocked from the news. I felt so much pain retelling the story to my dad’s friend and cried/ hyperventilated when I got home.
On top of this, I have dealt with anxiety the whole day from my boyfriend who has been one of my biggest supporters throughout my grief journey.
Backstory: He cheated on me 4 years ago and I forgave him, we started dating again this year. I told him that I had a dream that cheated on me. I texted him about it expressing that the dream upset me and clarified later that I was not accusing him, even though it was a dream it frustrated me, given our history. In turn, he told that he is mad at me and has since been giving me the silent treatment. I didn’t want to tell him about my dad’s 40 day thing either because I did not want him to think I’m using that to get him to speak to me.
I’m filled with anxiety about everything and upset that I’ve pushed one of my biggest supports away on one of the days I need the most support on.
Should I have kept to myself??
