severe inability to interact BUT not introversion or anxiety
this was something that bothered me my whole life. i always felt fundamentally different, everyone at school/college was able to interact, make friends, laugh and join each other while i was the kid who always sat alone, i was never able to do what they did, i did have a few friends who understood me, but for 99.9% of my time, i was alone and most of the friends were just using me. Human social interaction is alien to me, i simply cannot understand it. i thought i was shy for a long time, but shyness and anxiety were simpler answers, you can talk once you get more comfortable to someone. I was shy but when i approached someone i really didn’t know what to do or say like how it naturally came to them, its like they were handed a guidebook at birth teaching them all the social skills, but i never received such a book. and please dont tell me to learn social skills, this was something people naturally picked up, so why couldn’t I? i did grow up surrounded by introvert siblings and neglectful parents, but it wasnt severe, i was still able to talk to them most of the time. please help me find out what might’ve went wrong with me. it just seems everyone is so normal while im a glitch in the game.
@excitableSun85
“i really didn’t know what to do or say like how it naturally came to them, its like they were handed a guidebook at birth teaching them all the social skills, but i never received such a book. and please dont tell me to learn social skills,”
The question is, did others just naturally HAVE social skills or did they learn them? See, I felt much like you for a long time. My family was a messed up place and I didn’t have a good model of social skills. I assumed everyone else knew something I didn’t, or had something I lacked. I think perhaps you have a distorted view of yourself. That you’re much more capable than you realize. Your initial reaction to this will be disbelief. But are you willing to be willing to believe that you’re a lot more like everyone around you than you think? What if the solution is to get better at navigating your own emotions? If you do that, learning social skills isn’t as daunting as you think. What would you give to be where you want to socially if you could? (That’s a rhetorical question). If you really want it, it’s a shorter path than you think.
but kids really learn social skills from those around them in school. this was way too severe for me. you misread my post. im not asking for solutions im just asking for reasons…
plus i cant be the only one from an abusive home. I know a lot more people who were, and they still had good social skills.
@excitableSun85 Sorry I jumped right in and offered solutions. Just that I learned social skills much later in life than I would have liked and I don’t want that for you. Of course we have challenges from our past and it affects us all differently even siblings from the same family.
