My parents called a psychiatric ambulance to hospitalize me by force

I have been struggling with mental health for the past 8 years and my parents were mostly unsupportive during this time. This ranged from taking away my prescription because my mother said that I made everything up and made the doctors believe that I have bipolar disorder to showing absolutely no support after scide attempt and overdose.

Last few months I have been dealing with so much pain, trauma and betrayal. I was already way past my breaking point. My father passed on flu or some other virus to me days before my birthday because he didn’t wear a mask despite me asking him to numerous times. I was supposed to go away for my birthday, but faced logistical issues that delayed the trip. My mother completely ignored me for 2 months and then suddenly wanted to give me a present on my birthday without trying to make any amends, not taking any responsibility for her actions and expecting me to just pretend like nothing happened. I snapped. It was the worst birthday ever.

Few days later yesterday I was laying on the couch watching tv, completely exhausted from the flu when she was making loud noises in the kitchen that made my headache unbearable. During that day she was ignoring me again (that’s her favorite pastime) not even asking if I need help or anything. I snapped again. I started screaming at her because of the noise she made and how inconsiderate she was to my pain. And she was intentionally making me more and more infuriated. She told me that I should go to my room if I don’t like it, that I should be working and earning money, despite knowing how triggering the money issue is for me and how much I hate being financially dependent on them and the fact that every time I have to ask them for money they make it a humiliating process and always reminding me how much money they spent on me. It’s not my fault that they gave birth to me in a *** country that provides no social support whatsoever and I didn’t ask to be born, neither could I predict that I will be in this situation struggling with finances, mental health and just about everything else in life. She kept coming at me with hurtful words seeing that I’m not taking it well and already mad and infuriated. My father joined my mother so now they were 2 against 1 verbally attacking me. Normally, I would go out for a walk, remove myself from this toxic environment, but I was sick. I think I had a dysphoric mania episode or whatever else. I completely lost myself and started physically attacking them. All the past trauma and hurt and pain from the time they were constantly beating me when I was a child together with new trauma blinded my eyes and I couldn’t store it inside any longer. Unlike me not being able to defend myself when they were hitting me when I was a child, they were quite actively defending themselves. My mother bit my hand with her teeth and then pressed the door on my hand stuck between the door and the door frame. My father and her were hitting me back. She continued to verbally abuse me throughout all of this. She said that nothing in this house belongs to me. I took let vase and slammed it on the floor and some other stuff. I couldn’t control myself. I turned to see my father laughing and filming me on his phone to have evidence against me. They told me that they will put me into a mental institution and started calling an ambulance. An ambulance came. I locked myself in my room and my father told them that he knows how to break the lock. He was basically all in in helping them break into my room and take me by force. I told the doctors that I will call the police if they try to break in. As I mentioned I live in a *** country with horrible medical system. The doctor was a two faced lying piece of garbage when she talked to me she tried to act all compassionate and told me that no one can or will take me to hospital by force. But when I listened to her talking to my parents she basically told them that they don’t need my permission and can hospitalize me by force if they want to. In the end they didn’t do anything because I had fever because of the virus and they said that no hospital will admit me with fever and left.

I don’t know what to say. I lived a real life horror story unfolding in front of me. My worst nightmare. I’m not proud of physically attacking them. I’m not that kind of person. I’m not violent. But years of physical and emotional abuse and pain can drive anyone mad. But if I’m crazy they’re just as crazy. If I should go into mental institution, they should also be there in another room. They’re not any better. But the way they tried to paint me as a problem and a crazy one is beyond betraying. You know there are so many stories when parents hide their kids from police when they commit crimes because they love them and want to protect them no matter what. Mine called the ambulance and gave me up like rats. Like I’m not their daughter, but an inconvenience and a burden. I’m screaming in pain inside, but no one can hear me.