I want to imrpove
Hello Im a 14 year old girl who has recently realised that i have been a horrible toxic friend. I want to improve but the things Ive done are really bad (spreading rumours, telling secrets, victimizing myself etc) yes i know im v selfish and bad at heart but i really want to change. Almost everyone in my school knows all the wrong things i jave done and dont want to be associated with me anymore which is fair. But I really want to change, any tips? Yes i have tried apologizing but they wont accept no matter what and i understand. Im unsure of how to make myself into a better person
Hello we all make mistakes and I am proud of you for wanting a improve. The past is the past if you do change. The first step to improving is to take actions to stop repeating the same mistakes. It's their freewill to decide to forgive you or not. Maybe it would be a good idea to give them space and avoid them. Have you considered changing school? It might be drastic but considering how everyone is treating you at school a fresh start might help.
You can try to be extra kind to others and be known for seeing the good in others. :) If changing school is not possible, and you get left out, it might be hard but it's okay to be alone. Stay confident and strong and stand up for yourself. Other than that, do your own things and have fun with yourself, spend more time on academics, family. They still need you really. I hope you don't feel too bad for yourself for too long because what is done is done so it might help to focus on what you can do.
Hi there, I read your post and first i wanna say well done for opening up about this as its not always eazy to open up about things so thats a big step. Second of all you released what you have done and you've been honest about it that's huge to also talk about and you came here to share about that and there's nothing wrong with that too. Your young and still a teen but what's important is you have realised what has happened and know you want to improve. I honestly think being here can help you and I'm sure it will improve yourself. We all make mistakes but don't be hard on yourself about it. Your human you gotta be gentle with yourself and feelings. I hope your journey here can help you and help your journey to better yourself will go well. Wishing you the best.
Hi D4n1ell4
I applaud you for your self-awareness, courage to admit wrongdoing, and the desire to right the wrong.
You can change, and your situation may be changed as well. I do think that it requires one on one consultation over a period of time to look deeply into what went wrong and why, how to improve it, and how to connect with others from that new space.
Regardless, keep going. You have admirable qualities!
:)
I wouldn’t say having done bad things makes you bad at heart- personally, although I know it sounds counter productive, letting go of shame and self punishment has made it easier for me to be good to the people around me. When we feel trapped, low on resources, love we could give ourselves, that’s when people act ***-I know I do when I feel that way. I had a friend that treat me this way at that age, and learning to understand her and have compassion for her circumstances helped me heal as well :,)
@D4n1ell4
I think that you are a kindhearted person and that you just made some mistakes and that's okay because we all make mistakes, especially at the age of 14. I recommend to just be friendly, honest and stay out of gossip for now on. If your old friends don't forgive you just make peace with that situation by wishing them the best and try starting fresh and making new ones. Let them know you are working on changing your ways. Keep in mind that u are young and have plenty of time to grow!
