I can't fit the textbook ADHD definition despite getting a Dx and it hurts
Hi,,
So I'm struggling with an issue I had my entire life. I lack the ability to finish assignments earlier than the last day before they're due. When I start early I either can't focus or I'm too slow that I work twice as much as my peers but finish half as much, because my brain doesn't activate UNLESS I have adrenaline from deadline urgency. Similarly, It's nearly impossible to start, persist, and finish things I'm interested in, because I need the task to be exciting to give me adrenaline and I can finish it. This also affects my entire life, my hobbies, relationships, sleep, etc.. After a year of asking around, most told me it sounds like Bipolar or ADHD. I told my psych then I got diagnosed w/ ADHD, the ritalin worked and then it stopped. But I regret getting diagnosed anyway, I felt misunderstood. Most ADHD ppl online, fit the stereotype or textbook definition, They're easily distracted, forgetful, or lose things. I'm not like this. My brain is just selective, when under pressure or excitement, it works well, otherwise, It doesn't. ADHD symptoms when described, sound like they always happen, for me, they only happen when my conditions aren't met. I heard that ADHD ppl focus well when interested, but, most articles/ppl talk about the focus issues and a few talk about the interest or urgency side. And my issue with adrenaline isn't talked about enough that it feels part of ADHD.
I feel like everyone wants to be a stereotype because it's 'trendy'. Why doesn't anyone talk about having non-stereotypical ADHD outside of primarily inattentive or hyperactive? and maybe someone who doesn't forget much, forces their focus, and is an 'adrenaline junkie' bc adrenaline makes them clear-headed? I don't fit the stereotype or medical definition and I feel invalid and this is why I don't have ADHD and I still don't know why I can't achieve any goals in life 😔 (not seeking validation, just want to know if people like me exist, they aren't represented bc the stereotype is more 'quirky')
I understand this. My sister has ADHD, and it frustrates me when I see tik-toks or trendy versions of the stereotypical ADHD. Frankly it’s not often the quirky personality that people seem to think of, there’s so much more to the disorder and a lot of frustrations unseen to trends. So no, you are not alone. I’ll add that I am exactly the same way when it comes to getting things done, I can’t find any motivation until adrenaline kicks in and this gets in the way of things that need to be done. If I start early I lose motivation or my extreme perfectionism kicks in and the project takes forever. Although in my case, I have ASD.
Hey @excitableSun85
I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. It's important to remember that people experience conditions like ADHD in unique ways, and not everyone fits the typical stereotype. Your experiences are valid, and it's unfortunate that you feel misunderstood. It's true that ADHD symptoms can manifest differently for different individuals, and your description of how your brain works under pressure or excitement is valuable. Many people with ADHD do find that their focus and motivation can be improved in certain situations, including when they are interested in the task at hand or under the influence of adrenaline.
While the common narrative might not fully capture your experience, it's important to recognize that there are others who share similar challenges. Seeking support from mental health professionals who specialize in ADHD or connecting with online communities where people share their unique stories and experiences might help you find a sense of belonging and understanding. Remember that you're not alone, and there are resources and people who can relate to what you're going through. If you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to reach out. Your feelings are valid, and your perspective is important.
