I wish I could tell everybody that...
I don't want to live anymore. I'm tired of making everyone else happy while I'm dying inside because no one cares how I'm doing. It's my job to help everyone else but it's no ones job to check on me. But my jobs not done because I'm not willing to screw up my kids by choosing to not be here for them. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place for a long time.
1) I am breaking
2) I am not fine
3) It is really mean when you judge someone by how they look
I get tired too
I never intend to sound judgemental and that I'm only asking questions to try and understand you better. That I appreciate being told if someone feels offended by what I am saying or doing instead of assuming I am a vindictive or judgemental person. I can adapt and am willing to change my point of view if new information rings true to me. I'm ever growing and am not a personality set in stone.
I don't know how or why, but everything WILL be OK!🌞
No matter what you think, you are not alone and somebody loves you.☺👬ðŸ‘👫
I'm depressed and I'm hurting so bad
I can't deal with everyone's expectations, I can't be what they want me to be
i am struggling so much but i want to stay strong for them
I'm so scared. I'm so scared that I'll make one slip up and it'll ruin everything I've worked so hard for. I'm so scared that I'll say something I don't mean and ruin a relationship. I'm so scared about anything and everything that I spend more time worrying about something going wrong than I do going and living my life without a care...
@iridescentink
Hi, iridescentink. I've been there. I understand this post, and I GET it.
The crippling fear of failing is quite possibly one of the worst feelings ever. What I've found myself doing in these moments is playing the, "and then what happens" game. Say, for example, I'm directing a play (I'm a theatre person by trade), and I'm growing more and more anxious about how it'll play out. I begin thinking, "What if the actors don't memorise their lines?" *and then what happens?* well, they will have to improvise, *and then what happens* well, the stage will either go dead on or they will recover, *and then what happens* if they don't recover, people will laugh or leave! *and then what happens* I'll recoup with my actors and crew, and I'll be supportive *and then what happens* we'll work on the lines they missed and prepare for another show.
Usually in these cases, even the worse case scenario (I'll fail! People will laugh! I will never be able to work in the theatre industry again!) seems recoverable if played out step by step -- but most of all, usually, the worse case scenario is NOT the one that will play out. :)
@JanieRose
thats actually a very good idea :) I'm a pessimistic person naturally so I usually end up thinking the worst about everything, but what you suggested is a very good idea-- I'll start trying it !