I feel like people don't give me enough grace.
I kinda know why I'm writing this, and I kinda don't. Logically speaking, I think it is stupid of me to be writing this. No amount of information I have ever read has ever been helpful to me. That stuff makes what should be a joy into something very complicated. At least too complicated for my brain to process.
I can't make friends, and if something starts to happen, it won't be long before it is dead. I always have a way of stumbling across something I didn't know about. After that whatever good was going on, gets destroyed. Why didn't I know about it? Because the other person never told me about it.
Speaking from my own negative experiences. People are strange. What makes one person laugh, will horrify another. I never try to be offensive because I don't desire to lose anyone. I wish more people would be more understanding and have thicker skin. If your friend accidentally offense you over something they don't know about, then why get mad and push them away for it?
I have met lots of people that have acted this way to me. Look it takes time to get to know someone and where their individual boundaries are. I feel like people don't give me enough grace or even enough credit for how hard I work on this. Usually what destroys these friendships is not anything big. To another person it might not even make a blip on the radar. sigh
@tryingtosurvive2024
It is Not you.
This happens to many people seem to have less patience to give real time to learn who a person is anymore.
One small comment taken the wrong way or out of context ... so we all are at an arms length and watching every word action and what we are getting in return is not real friendship imo. real friends know we are not always PC or have bad days. May not help you but know you are not the only one who faces this.
@toughTiger6481 Thank you for the comment. I just wish people look at it like this. If the person has a good track record, then give them some extra grace. If a person is acting like a bully or is mean spirited, then avoid them. What upsets me is how two people who have been getting long good for a long time, and then all of a sudden one of them says something that upsets the other one, and everybody is ready to just give up on each other.
This doesn't just happen to me on the internet. I've had it happen many times at work. And I'm always left scratching my head.
As a janitor, if I just happen to inconvenience a teacher one time, that person is through with me. It doesn't even seem to matter that I can go year after year with a good track record. All it takes is that one time, and over and done.
@tryingtosurvive2024
It is them not you.... I understand i have a friend we had good conversations and enjoyed company yet i said something(?) maybe that they disagree with and now they seem cold to discussion.
It is childish IMO ... if they had a problem they can and should speak about if something is bothering them about something said. Avoiding people will never make others see or understand their point of view or come to an understanding.
@toughTiger6481 I agree with you! In fact I think it is stupid for a person to think they will find someone that will agree with them on everything. The love in a friendship needs to transcend little disagreements, and idiosyncrasies. I remember there was a time when people would say: "nobody is perfect". I'm just happy when I find a person who are similar to me. Friendships work as long as the people involved are willing to talk and work on things.
