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I lied to my dad...

amicableJet5919 March 13th, 2021
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Yesterday I lied to my dad about why I got sick...I want to tell him what's going on, but I don't want him to feel as if it's his fault. He battles severe depression as is, so I can't put more on him...I tried telling my mother but she views it as a joke...I feel trapped, like I have no one to help, no one to tell me it's okay, and it makes me feel worse about who I am...I tried eating but I just can't. I don't know why I'm posting this honestly. A cry for help? A cry to just feel accepted and that it's okay, that I'm not messed up because of this, but if anyone reads this and is feeling down as well, I'm here for you, all of you ๐Ÿ’›

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alinazahoor March 13th, 2021
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I have been where u are right now. I am completely dependent on my bf emotionally. I need help. I have a sudden pain in my chest .if he doesn't reply or call me I go insane please please help me ...

amicableJet5919 OP March 13th, 2021
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How long have you guys been together?

amicableJet5919 OP March 13th, 2021
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The best advice I am able to give it to be open and honest. Tell him how you're feeling. Tell him you're worried and feel anxious when he doesn't respond. Communication is key in a relationship, I've learned that the hard way, and if you're battling an ED and don't feel comfortable telling him yet, wait until you are comfortable. I plan on researching before telling my dad, so if he has any questions, I am able to answer them. Take your time, build up trust and be honest with one another

pessimisticView March 13th, 2021
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We're here for you as well ๐Ÿ’™. Anyways, I'm in a similar as you, except it's been going on for a long time. My siblings "tease" me a lot (like everyday) and it hurts, I tried asking them to stop and telling them that it's actually hurting me but they viewed it as a joke and ignored it. It's still happening but I think I've already accepted what they say as correct, even if I don't want to. I don't have anyone to talk to either and I feel better when I watch or read angst, but that's only a personal and temporary solution. Whenever I tell people (I've only told two people both online and in real life added together), they either take it as a joke or say that it's okay even though it isn't. So I've started thinking that maybe I'm being overdramatic or they're just exaggerating things. I think you should just wait for the perfect moment to tell him the truth, he might get angry (depending on his personality) but he'll eventually forgive you because one lie is better than 100, and I don't know the details but it doesn't sound extremely serious so he's probably being overdramatic if he doesn't forgive you for years. Plus, he might trust you and see you in a better light for having the courage to tell him the truth. The worst case scenario is that he'll be angry at you for a day or two and might not trust you as much after (despite it not sounding like a serious problem) but he'll eventually forget about it. If you're still feeling scared, you can just help him battle depression to help you feel less guilty for a single lie.

amicableJet5919 OP March 13th, 2021
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Thank you...I'm just worried he'll say I'm saying it for attention. I told 1 of my friends and now she treats me like a child almost. "Did you eat" "did you drink water" "go eat" I understand she's trying to help, but it honestly seems like it's making it harder. I'm sure my father would be caring and help, but it's still scary. Him and I only have each other in this house at the end of the day. My mother cheated on him, which brought back the memories of what my sister's mother did too, and he nearly took his life. It wasnt until my mother cheating came to light that this started affecting me. I used food as a way to cope and my father only had me to talk to, so he always comes to me to talk, but for some reason I'm terrified he won't give me the support I have given to him out of love. He battles depression and eating disorders, too...the listeners I've talked to on here have helped in some way, but it feels like they all say the same thing "it's okay" "you can over come this" "it will get better" but it only seems to get worse..I'm sorry you have to go through this as well..

alinazahoor March 13th, 2021
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He is a nice guy. I'm just too dependent on him

amicableJet5919 OP March 13th, 2021
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How dependant is he on you? Also does he notice how dependant you are and does he point it out or become distant?

alinazahoor March 13th, 2021
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I just dont want to feel like dying if he isn't there for me

mygirlliddy March 13th, 2021
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@amicableJet5919

firstly, i think you're a wonderful, kind person to be so considerate of your dad's mental health and not tell him about your bulimia issues. i can't exactly provide advice for you in that matter, if you should tell him or not, because i've never spent a day in your life. i do, however, trust you to make decisions that make most sense to you.

secondly, you are not alone!!!! babe, please, please, don't ever think you're alone. at this exact moment, there's thousands of people worldwide who will fully understand what you're going through, b/c they've been through it, too. you can get through this, you are strong enough!

i hope, genuinely hope, that your situation gets better. sending u much love n warmth from this random corner of the earth <3

amicableJet5919 OP March 13th, 2021
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Thank you, thank you so much...I think once we both recover, well when he gets at least a little better and I recover from this fall, I'm going to tell him. But only when we're both better. My dad is my world, I don't want more stress put on him...thank you again, it truly means a lot. The listeners on here do help, don't get me wrong, but I feel like they all say the same things, that it's okay and I'll get better even though it doesn't seem like it

mygirlliddy March 14th, 2021
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@amicableJet5919 that's not a very far-fetched thing to think, though, is it?

you may feel like those are just hollow words, and people say it because what else are they supposed to say? so, real talk, we don't know if it will get better or not, none of us can see into the future can we? it may, it may not.

chances are higher it may, though! :)

but regardless of all that, hope is crucial. hope, developing an innate belief that things WILL get better one way or another, is so powerful. when you truly believe that good days will come, and you just need to soldier on through these dark times, you will automatically feel better about your situation :) that's why everyone keeps saying it will get better, because these people have mastered the art of hope. and it really does work, i promise.

i know we're not supposed to give out advice, but i think if you tried to express your frustrations in a form of art i.e writing, painting, sketching, poetry, etc, it could really help you. or maybe watching a really engrossing film or smth like that.

again, i have no idea what your life is like so my advice could be totally useless, but i just want you to feel better :) know that things will get better. they almost always do.

as always, sending u all my love <3