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Men are the source of my body image issues
gecko1287 May 21st, 2023
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I have BED and I've recently been seeing a new dietician. In her opinion, I'm killing it, but its hard for me to enjoy the success because I put on weight in the process of changing my eating habits. She went to school, she has a degree and I don't, and every session I try to trust in her advice and I always follow it but gaining weight has really ruined my mental health. I've been isolating from others, I do not leave my room unless I have to.

I've always been a bigger girl, I'm in college and I'm the biggest of my friends by far. I want to be loved and chosen by a guy just as much as all my friends do, were college girls god d a m m i t, and they're chosen by guys all the time but I'm often ignored at best, berated at the worst. It drives me to obsess about my body and all I ever care about is how to get smaller.

I ask this: Do I have to cut guys out of my life, and give up on the idea of being chosen by a guy I like, to be able to accept my larger body? I only want to be smaller for men. So if I don't allow myself to care about them, I could just exist and be in my larger body without the real emotional turmoil I experience every day because of it? I don't know if I could control my thought patterns like that even if it were the answer. I'm really sad that I feel I don't have as much as a right to a relationship as these thinner girls do, but they get the guy every time, it seems. Sometimes I feel like college is made for tiny girls.

I'm upset that this is where I've landed but it's where I've landed. Like its boys or my mental health, not both. If you read through all that you're a real one, and please let me know if you deal with the same stuff. It's not easy being a big girl.

1
Mya000 May 24th, 2023
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@gecko1287

I'm really sorry to hear that you're struggling with your body image and the impact it has on your mental health. It's important to remember that you are not alone in feeling this way, and many people can relate to the challenges you're facing.

Firstly, please know that you deserve love and acceptance just as much as anyone else, regardless of your size. Your worth is not determined by your body or your ability to conform to certain sexist standards. It's understandable to desire a loving relationship, but it's important to focus on finding someone who appreciates and values you for who you are as a person, rather than solely based on your appearance.

Finding self-acceptance can be a difficult journey, especially when faced with societal pressures and comparison to others. It's crucial to prioritize your mental and emotional well-being. Instead of trying to change yourself solely for the sake of attracting someone, focus on nurturing a positive relationship with yourself. This involves practising self-love, embracing your unique qualities, and developing a healthy body image.

You're not alone in this journey, and reaching out for help and support is a sign of strength. Take care of yourself ❤️

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