What next
I had/have? anorexia (and bulimia for a bit there) from when I was 17 till about 19 Consistantly then I eased - I would engage in eating disorder behaviours maybe 3 times a week or something Give or take after that and threw up rarely. Now I’m nearly 27 and it’s been nearly 10 years and I stil battle every time I eat a meal. I don’t partake in the eating disorder behaviour physically. But I make plans and the thoughts are there CONSTANTLY. If I’m subconsciously stressed out it gets worse ... sometimes I partake for a day... it’s more like I make these ridiculous plans for restriction like it’s going to be great .. then I “fail” and have a melt down then it just goes back to constant thoughts. I feel like I’m not “sick” enough to get help but I struggle all day and it’s been 10 years... like... what’s next for me I think.
It sounds like you've done the hardest parts. You've changed your behaviour and you've said you need more help. I'd recommend some counciling, the negative thoughts need to get out of your head where they can settle and you can get some closure. Feel free to message me too if that helps, I had my own eating problems and I understand it sounds easier than it is
Thanks for your reply. Chatting more sounds good
I guess im struggling with bulimia as well still am and have been for a few years now im 17, and I dont eat but when I do it which i think is once or twice a day I always throw it back up sometimes I stick my fingers down my throat other times I dont, and its been going on like this for years and school bullies dont help nor does your parents and friends constantly telling you your fat and your ugly, I make plans to not eat or only eat this or that and sometimes with my depression being present I just forget to eat all together and I dont care or notice till the next day and I feel like im sick but not sick enough to ask for help because its all my fault I dont deserve help anyways always telling me that and now I believe it too, but sorry anyways I hope things get better for you and talking with someone might be very helpful whether their a therapist counselor or just a friend or stranger it helps either way but helps a lot more depending on who you prefer talking to.
@shyomega123 Hi there ! That sounds really intense and exhausting. School is a really hard time. My eating disorder also started in high school. I was bullied, my home life was also very unstable and abusive at times, I was taking drugs to cope and I felt completely alone. Not saying our stories are the same. But as I have grown into an adult - my eating disorder has grown and changed too. I have discovered amazing supportive people and I’ve realised that being an emotional person is who I am and that is actually amazing. And why people love me. I know how hard it is and alone you can feel. But trust me when I say that things get better. Beauty is everywhere - including in you. I hope you find your inner peace and I hope it gets better for you. I know it can because I lived that.
