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Emptiness

lightSpring5671 January 13th, 2023

I feel numb inside. I am doing my routine tasks but I don't know what I am thinking right now. I have to pretend that my life is perfect but it's not. I keep remembering people I lost but my tears are dried. And even sometimes I doubt that there is something like love and sincerity in this world. I am afraid of making friends. I am afraid that I will never be able to become the person I dreamt to be. I am afraid that if I show my real self to anyone they will not accept me. I have a cover that makes others think that I am perfect but I am not even recognizing myself due to that cover. I am lost somewhere and I want to find myself.

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toughTiger6481 January 14th, 2023

@lightSpring5671

pretending is tiring and empty and soon you may forget who you are too..... i think many play a pert then wonder why it is not working.... I doubt anyone is who they thought they might be......... life has disappointments and they people who seem to be happiest are those who lay their masks down and quit pretending

1 reply
lightSpring5671 OP January 14th, 2023

Thank you for your advice but I am not ready yet to lay my mask down. People around me are predators and they want to know others weaknesses to prey on them.

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kalymmenon January 14th, 2023

@lightSpring5671 Concerning society, it is wise to construct a strategy.

A mask is necessary, only it doesn't have to be something "fake". It can be manipulated, adjusted, perfected into something you know you won't suffer, because it will be as a figure on the chessboard.

bestVase7265 January 15th, 2023

I think that sometimes you find yourself by taking the risk of exposing how you are really feeling. Few people really back away from that. Sometimes they don't understand right away, but most people really care.. @lightSpring5671

lightSpring5671 OP January 17th, 2023

Thank you all for your advices. ❤️

3 replies
bestVase7265 January 18th, 2023

How are you feeling now?@lightSpring5671

2 replies
lightSpring5671 OP January 24th, 2023

Still empty but now I can see that I am not alone here🙂

1 reply
bestVase7265 January 25th, 2023

Exactly. It is nice to have a group of people who understand what you are going through and aren't going to judge you. @lightSpring5671

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