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Is anyone unable to get a handle on how they feel?

NellaNutella June 16th, 2020

I have tried so many times already to assess how I feel but it never really makes sense. When I try think about it my head just goes to mush and I just feel so tired. It's like a pressure builds up in my head and I cannot focus on what I am feeling. It is just a giant mess. I feel like crying, like I'm sad, anxious, numb but at the same time I feel like I am fine and okay. Above all, I just feel so utterly tired, like I cannot focus on my feelings or understand them because my brain is just clouded by tiredness. I'm just so tired of it all. I don't know how I feel anymore. Does anyone else feel like this? Share your experience, offer advice, it doesn't matter, I just want to see that I am not alone in this!

I hope everyone else is doing okay though

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SilverbackTiger June 16th, 2020

@NellaNutella Sounds to me like you may be experiencing burnout.

Perhaps you don't necessarily need to make sense of your feelings right now. That alone can be an exhausting and endless task, since they are ever changing and I'm not sure they can ever be truly understood.

It's like looking into a kaleidoscope at the best of times.

I would just say go easy on yourself, rest, find inner peace, be at one with yourself.

Maybe after time, going gently, you might feel less tired and all of this could be less overwhelming.

I wish you the very best on your journey.

2 replies
NellaNutella OP June 16th, 2020

@SilverbackTiger

Thank you! I have considered burnout but I don't know from what really. I am trying to focus on getting better though so thank you for supporting me. It means a lot!

1 reply
SilverbackTiger June 16th, 2020

@NellaNutella With burnout, we may not necessarily be able to identify the reasons as to why we got there or how it happened. Sometimes it's just our bodies telling us to take a well-earned rest. :)

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Sylwind June 17th, 2020

@NellaNutella

This sounds highly familiar. Emotions are something I've never been able to get a handle on, I've always tried to control them and previously it's made me lose myself. I'd like to think I'm getting better, but I keep running into the walls you describe. I feel so much sadness and anxiety and dealing with it isn't my forte, so my brain ends up muddled and I end up caring little for everything, even the things I'm most passionate about. Ultimately I end up feeling very alone, but for the most part, that's just me making myself feel that way. I'm trying to learn and be better, it's hard, but I think it may be a necessity. I hope your journey to figure out things for yourself goes well.

1 reply
NellaNutella OP June 17th, 2020

@Sylwind

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences! I get how it feels to just push emotions away and especially how it ends up making me careless. Even if I try, I end up just not caring about the things I should. I really hope it gets better for you and just remember that you are not alone in what you go through! Thank you!

Lots of love heart

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wonderousPenguin June 18th, 2020

@NellaNutella

Hey! I used to experience depression for a few years and I completely understand this. There's just so much going on at once, and I used to get this very heavy feeling in my chest, almost like it was hard to breathe and think straight. I think this is common in depression, especially since depression affects how you think and your concentration levels.

At the time something I wish what I could have practiced more was thinking less about my emotions and instead observe them. This might sound a little weird, but it's a technique used in mindfulness practice. So what you do is almost try to disconnect yourself from your emotions and accept them for exactly what they are- thoughts and emotions. Then, like clouds, you watch them as they do what ever they do (get worse, spiral further, get better, go away). The next step is to put a label on as either a Thought or an Emotion. The idea behind is is that when we think too much about what we feeling, we become trapped in them and spiral down further. Giving them a nod, acknowledging them and accepting them gives them less power in theory. I say in theory but I have used this technique for anxiety, anger, hurt and many other emotions and I feel after I have a more realistic view of my emotions. I hope this helps! Feel free to reply if you want to discuss this a bit more. Keep well :)

2 replies
NellaNutella OP June 18th, 2020

@wonderousPenguin

Thank you for your wonderful reply. I realized that I have felt that heavy feeling in my chest as well, I just didn't know to describe it. The mindfulness actually seems like it might help. I'll keep it in mind and try it out next time I start to spiral like that. It seems pretty cool and a good way to clear my head. Thank you so much. I really hope you're feeling better with your own feelings as well!

Lots of love treasure heart

1 reply
wonderousPenguin June 18th, 2020

@NellaNutella

No worries, feel free to message me as well if you need to talk, we're all here for you :)

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creativeDime4212 June 18th, 2020

Handle on how I feel? PPPH!

2 replies
NellaNutella OP June 18th, 2020

@creativeDime4212

Honestly, thank you for your post, it made me laugh. I can totally relate to that one! laugh

Lots of love treasure heart

@creativeDime4212

i totally get that. I've been in treatment for months and some days it still totally feels that way. You've got my support!

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RinaP June 18th, 2020

@NellaNutella

Hi! I do relate to what you said very much! To me many times happened that I would suddenly feel nervous, sad or angry and maybe cried and then when people would come and ask me "what happened?" or "how do you feel?" and "why do you feel this way?" I wouldn't know what to answer! In general I find it very hard to focus on my thoughts and many times I just need to speak them outloud, talking to myself, in order to make sense with a logical reasoning. Lately I'm trying to take time to stop and observe better what happens to me, the emotions I feel and my thoughts. I'm also trying to write them down when I can and re-read them. I find that I was all the time kind of "rushing" with my mind, jumping from one thing to another, and especially when an unpleasant feeling would come up I immediately looked for distraction. And the funny part is that I was assuming to know what was going on! Like "ok, I already know this, it's bad, let's push it aside", but now I realize that with this attitude I wasn't understanding my issues and what was going on with myself really. Always pushing things aside and not looking at them, never took the time to stop, even five minutes, and acknowledge what I was feeling actually, what I really was thinking about. Just saying "it's wrong, or I don't need to feel this way". Maybe I was right in a way, but I'm understanding now that in order to get better I do need to stop, take a look, maybe write what I'm feeling, maybe just sit with it for a few moments, maybe try to explain it to someone else (also writing to myself as if writing to someone else). Often I feel too much pressure in my mind to do this so I just try to relax and acknowledge things, without judgement. And I tell myself that I can come back to the subject in a moment when I feel more rested and maybe write things down and look at it better. I also spoke with someone about this, and I understand that in the beginning the mind can be very confused and the process of writing things down can be messy and confusing but then, if practiced regularly, it gets better in time. Like the mind learns how to notice things that are happening to you, thoughts that are coming up etc. And eventually things start to get a little clearer.

Just wanted to say that I relate to what you said pretty much and share a little bit of my experience! Please feel free to talk it over if you want to! :) Wish you all the best

2 replies
NellaNutella OP June 18th, 2020

@RinaP

Thank you so much for your reply, it is incredibly nice to see that others are going through the same experiences as me. Your advice is also really useful and I think I've done something along the lines of that. When I can then I acknowledge what I am feeling and it does get better. I've noticed that writing also helps. I'll try to put more of an effort into doing these things so thank you for the possible solutions. I also wanted to let you know that you're not alone in this either and that I'm sorry you had to go through things like that. Most importantly, great job on overcoming that confusion because I know how hard it is to sift through your mind. Thank you so much for your reply, it means a lot!

Lots of love sweetheart heart

1 reply
RinaP June 19th, 2020

@NellaNutella

Thank you too for replying and sharing! I'm glad if my similar experience can be somehow helpful for others :) It can be interesting and also relieving I think to hear from other's experience with the same/similar issue, so I also like to read posts that relate to me and share if I can! Wish you a wonderful weekend heart

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mycrazzyworld June 20th, 2020

@NellaNutella

Hi,

This is EXACTLY how i have been feeling for the past one year. And i am so glad to see this thread because for the first time I can relate to someone who is in the same boat as me. I wish i could offer you some advice but i would just like to say that you arent alone and we will get through this.

Take care!

1 reply
NellaNutella OP June 20th, 2020

@mycrazzyworld

Thank you so much for responding because it is great to see that they're other people feeling like me. It's good to know that we are not alone in this. I'm just happy to know that there are others so thank you so much! I hope you manage to get a hold of your feelings and thoughts!

Lots of love treasure heart

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calmsoulmeet June 20th, 2020

@NellaNutella

I completely relate with what you wrote . There are times when I experience exactly the same . Unfortunately I haven't yet found a way to deal with it . Do u have times when you want to cry and let it all out but the tears just don't come ?? Like inside you are really broken , but you just can't cry.

1 reply
NellaNutella OP July 28th, 2020

@calmsoulmeet

I'm actually feeling like that right now. Everything sort of just feels numb and even though I feel like I want to cry and break down, it just feels like too much effort. As if even if I try, I just can't. Sorry that I can't write more, I'm just really apathetic right now but I can relate.

Lots of love heart

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