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nothing really

0820170719105 August 12th, 2020

I don't know the point of me posting this honestly. I don't even have real problems like everyone else.

Normally I'd just talk to a therapist but this stupid quarantine makes it so I can't, as I have no real privacy at home and it'd cause even more fights

People just... they're all just disappearing from my life and it's like I never existed

I guess I deserve it, even if it's only every two weeks or something maybe I'm still annoying or clingy

I mean I knew deep down I didn't mean anything to anyone, that once I stopped it'd be no one had even ever existed, but I'm very delusional and I still hoped deep down even one person would maybe care? But I know and I can see clearly now I have nothing that could ever make me important or even slightly memorable.

Once I stopped talking to family, once I stopped letting them use me it's like they never knew me or something. I stopped initiating for a week and a friend just never reached out again. This happened with another person as well...in that one i guess it's more my fault...

I'd messed up badly several times in a relationship, I still loved them and was very close to them, you know still saying I love you and all that. Suddenly I didn't hear from them in months, when we reconnected, which only happened because I still reached out, suddenly they were with someone else. In a matter of months. I never heard anything. We started talking again but I notice a distance growing even with how I try.

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animellow August 12th, 2020

@0820170719105

animellow August 12th, 2020

@0820170719105 I'm no good at comforting, but I will say that social interaction IS hard. Sometimes no matter how hard you try, it doesn't work. Sounds to me like you ARE trying - so I think it's no fault on your part. Each of us has flaws - fatal and trivial. Sometimes we are unable to fix them even if we try. But it's up to the person on the other side to accept you as it sounds you accept and stll want them (otherwise, I don't think you would be trying). So no, I think while you might not be perfect, or giving results people expect, I know you're a beautiful and kind person for trying.

I would also be willing to be your friend, if you need one more :)

Take care and stay safe. I don't know you, but I love you, who you are, as a person.

2 replies
0820170719105 OP August 12th, 2020

@animellow

I'm sorry I took so long to respond. And that you had to see this. I didn't realize you couldn't delete threads on 7cups. But thank you for taking the time to write all of this. It was thoughtful for you as a stranger to go out of the way to.

I don't think it's possible to befriend people on here, as it's against the terms of service to post about outside contacts one might have. Not to mention, I guess this just wouldn't be the best way to meet me. But I greatly appreciate your offer. I do hope fortune for your future. You're very kind.

I'll try to keep this perspective in consideration

1 reply
animellow August 13th, 2020

@0820170719105

No, no, its alright! You have nothing to apologize for. Its normal to reply late (although I admit I also apologize for that.) I hope that by seeing this I didnt intrude on your privacy, but dont be sorry for posting this. Its okay to admit youre not okay, or to rant. No one can bottle things forever, or pretend they dont feel. Were not meant to.

As for the friends note, aww! I wouldve really enjoyed meeting you :,) So yeah, its too bad we cant be friends. Of course, I understand if you feel uncomfortable about me meeting you this way. Im just glad that you seem happy just from my offer. I also hope for your future, and thank you! I believe you are much kinder, and Im not just saying that. :)

Supporting you always, a stranger

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