Trying to find happiness when I am not.

Having to be home all day every day has made me realize just how much I hate myself. I miss being out of the house for 9-10 hours a day, being productive, and having a sense of importance. Now that I'm having to be home 24/7, I'm taking my anger and depression out on my partner and kids. I'm staying in my room for long periods of time. I get annoyed being around any of them for even a few minutes. My partner and I are arguing more frequently. Today is a holiday and all I want to do is sleep and be away from everyone. The things I enjoyed are not enjoyable anymore: food, games, books, shows, and sex. I want so badly to get back to work but I can't b/c of the pandemic. I want my normal life back. I miss having those hours to myself and being able to have the slightest energy to be around my family.

I'm not happy anymore and I sink further into my depression every day. I'm saying things I don't mean to say out loud and it's causing problems for me and my partner. How do I stop being bitchy and start being happy?