So there's an explanation for what I've been afraid of all this time, why I can't sleep, why I panic at night. I've been reading into it, they call it the concept of "eternal oblivion" and I guess I'm just wondering, do any of you struggle with this fear? I feel very alone and isolated because either nobody wants to talk about it or nobody else feels it and I'm insane. I need someone to talk to about this, my therapists always bring religion into the conversation and while I am wholeheartedly respectful of religion and I like discussing it with faithful friends and family, it just isn't my cup of tea. For me, based on my personal beliefs and feelings about this "eternal oblivion", trying to be religious just feels forced, like I'm lying to myself. I've tried to force myself to believe in something because anything is better than this, what I believe death will be like someday - but it doesn't help. It makes me feel like I am in denial. Anyone else feel this way?
@necrodancer I don't feel that way myself but I kind of agree.
I don't really see how the concept of eternal oblivion relates to religion, although I'm not an expert on either. Aren't religious beliefs generally in denial of oblivion?
I'm particularly surprised that therapists, of all people, bring religion into the conversation. Is it because they themselves secretly share your fear?
There must be therapists out there who would be more respectful of your feelings about it, and who would work harder at trying to understand from your point of view.
Charlie
@RarelyCharlie The connection they always seem to relate it to is that my lack of religious presence is "why I feel this way" and subsequently I end up quitting therapy because they don't seem to get it unfortunately. I've been in therapy for years because this fear came at a young age, following depression among many other things but growing up in a catholic home, and having these thoughts now have given me a deep sense of religious guilt. Feeling bad that I don't believe in god, heaven or hell and that due to that fact I am "forsaking god" and will thus end up in hell. I've sort of gotten over the religious guilt part but the eternal oblivion scares the hell out of me to be honest and close family and friends are supportive but don't seem to understand. The closest I have gotten to understanding or even conversing about it is in a subreddit about atheism and that has only made the panic attacks and nightmares worse.
@necrodancer Atheists would not immediately think in terms of religious presence, I suppose. So I wonder whether you can find an atheist therapist somehow.
I Googled it and found there's a Secular Therapy Project. I don't know anything about them, but I suppose they might be worth checking out.
By the way, if you'd like to chat to me about the issue, feel free to click on my profile picture and message me.
Charlie
@RarelyCharlie Thank you so much for the much needed advice and for the resources. I'm going to check out that link and if you truly don't mind, I might take you up on the offer to discuss it a little more. For some reason, talking about it helps and I have little support and limited funds for therapy and other devices right now. Thank you.