Not in a good headspace
Lately I’ve been feeling depressed. I have an appointment to get set back up on my antidepressants, but it’s a month away. I feel so hopeless and worthless. I don’t like the person that I see everyday, but my depression makes it hard for me to make the changes that I need to make. I just graduated college, I have an okay job, and I’m starting to work things out with my ex again. I should be happy, but I feel more lost than ever. I feel like I’m not doing enough with my life. I can’t seem to get back into my hobbies. I feel like I just work and come home. I hate when my chest feels this heavy. I get irritated so easily, and just don’t know what to do with myself. I find myself sleeping more than normal and eating more which in turn makes me feel worse about my body image. I’m just feeling hopeless.
You said "Lately"... about how long have you felt like this?
@fww1976 A couple of week now.
Is it OK if I ask you some additional questions about statements you made in your original post? I am sorry you are going through this. 🙁
@djhmbtr
Yes… that uncomfortably familiar feeling of not being able to take joy from the things you used to love doing, struggling to have the energy to make positive changes to your life, and generally not feeling good about anything can add up to feel quite overwhelming. You say that you should feel happy because you’ve graduated and have a job and maybe things will get better with your ex, but those aren’t necessarily all the conditions for you to feel fully alive. Maybe you’re missing fun trips that you used to go on, sports events or music concerts, socializing with your friends back in college, having more time to speak with your family, just being able to sit back and fully enjoy a book or movie. Without those things that truly bring us joy in life, it’s easy and almost expectable that we can find ourselves not feeling happy. And also especially the transition from college to working life is huge, “officially” starting to carve your unique path through life, and there are so many learning and adjustment curves that come with every major change. Dealing with these changes can often times suck away a lot of time and energy, leaving us unable to have enough time to rest and relax and still do all the things we want to do, and making us irritable.
You mentioned that your appointment for your antidepressants is still roughly a month away. In the meantime, it may be helpful to try to be a little bit more accepting of what you are and aren’t capable of doing in your current situation and lower your expectations of what you “ought” to accomplish. Focus on trying to get out of bed to do literally anything, trying to eat a little bit less than you are now, and things like that to help take care of the basic needs in life. I would say that if you can achieve those goals, then you should feel accomplished about them because they were so hard for you to do right now! And that could help with improving your body image and alleviating at least some of the feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness. It’s okay to not like the person who you are right now, and hopefully through taking the tiny steps that you feel like are possible now and later on with the boost of the medications, you’ll be moving closer to who you want to be.
I recommend that you look through 7 Cups guide for depression for additional information: https://www.7cups.com/depression-help-online/
Take care of yourself and stay strong. You got this!
@djhmbtr
Hi,
Thank you for your post and I am sorry you're feeling this way.
Everything you're experiencing right now is a symptom of depression and is a normal response.
You are not alone and we're here to help you through these difficult challenges.
I have personally found that the people I didn't like, were the best people to help me because they actually had the life experience to understand.
If you would like a chat or some support, feel free to reach out or speak to one of our amazing listeners :)
I wish you well
