Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
  1. Forum
  2. Depression Support
  3. I just want to know what's wrong with me?

I just want to know what's wrong with me?
blindbob June 24th, 2022
.

I'm turning 40 soon. I've never been in a real relationship. I never knew what it was like to have my person, to feel special to someone, to expect kindness. Yes, expect. I never know what it was like to have someone to count on. At this point, I don't really think anything is going to improve this situation. If I couldn't meet anyone in my 20s when I looked really good and socialized a lot, how am I going to meet someone now? It's not just that I feel lonely. I also feel a deep sense of shame. Like there is something deeply wrong with me, or that God has decided to punish me in this way for my sins.

2
FrenchMarbles June 25th, 2022
.

@blindbob

Hi! I'm FrenchMarbles, one of the listeners here at 7Cups and it's really nice to meet you today.

I know as a society there is pressure to find 'your other half' and to raise children and basically be like everyone.

But where does it exactly say that? You're nearly 40, and you've went this far without being in a relationship, what if you don't actually need to be in one, you've said it yourself you don't feel lonely. I would explore the shame feeling you have as it sounds more like low confidence and you've put expectations on yourself.

Why do you think you need to be in a relationship?

blindbob OP July 9th, 2022
.

@FrenchMarbles i don't really care what society wants. These are things I want. I want a partner, I want friends, I want family. I want to have someone wait on me when I have surgery. I want someone to miss me when I'm not there. I want someone to share a laugh with. I want someone who cares about how my day went. Am I supposed to feel ashamed for wanting these things?

*Support Forum Disclaimer
My communities
Community guidelines
Report an issue
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist