Relationships professional and personal

@Dancersoul Hi! It appears you're having a tough time facing the workplace each new work week and I'm sorry to hear that's causing you distress. I also see you're dealing with physical pain too and that's probably making it hard to deal with all of what's going on.

I'd think it's great that you began this post stating how you're actively seeking help and that means there's a real chance to change. Is it harder to struggle on or to change? You can decide that.

If you believe it's time to do things a little differently, there are some skills that can help you with that:

Radical Acceptance: the skill of accepting that this is how things are right now. Acceptance begins by observing whether you're fighting or struggling with reality. Accepting doesn't mean you have to agree with reality or even like it. It's just a choice to stop fighting it. It begins with reminding yourself there are causes and reasons for why things are.

Emotional regulation: how to identify and deal effectively with difficult emotions. Not one of us ever got the manual, "Emotions: A Users Guide" as soon we learned to read, that was all on the job training, You learned ways to cope with emotions by watching, learning, coming up with things that seemed to work. Maybe there are better ways.

Distress tolerance: skills are great and learning what makes us vulnerable to extreme emotionals can help prevent a crisis. However, there comes times when we hit a crisis and can't even think let alone deal with emotions skillfully. I find having a crisis kit that I can turn to and just a few people I can turn to really helpful when I need to come down from "distress level 100".

Interpersonal Effectiveness: these skills to help you get what you want and need from others. How to build nurturing relationships and how to end destructive ones. How to balance acceptance and change in relationships.

Self-compassion: learning to forgive yourself, to love yourself as you are, to acknowledge that you're doing you're best with whatever help you ever got or didn't get in life.

Any or all of the above skills can be worked on either by yourself or with a counselor.

I think you're certainly capable of realizing your dreams and you're taking steps in that direction. Maybe it began by posting here. I wish you some peace and some relief from your pain today.