I don’t know
So here is my “life story” of JUST THIS year.
(I am home schooled)
starting of the year I felt grateful and amazing I was single. Then in around April I went to my town fair of course it was relatively small since i live in a small town. There I met a kid j used to see in the halls etc at school. He had a gf and both were ok i guess.
in June (6 to be exact) I started to date this guy we will call home Walter. I had a crush on him for years maybe 2 or 3 and it was the same with him.
(I met him when I was in regular school his parents are strict in ways)
i was happy knowing I could date and someone actually wanted to date me. Me and him were good friends before i guess. He was extremely dry in texts. Never flirted with me I always was the one carrying the conversation. And when I say dry I mean I say something and he said “okay” “ok” “lol” or uses the emojis.
i thought it was good some red flags here and there but I ignored them. One day my friend told me he would flirt with his friends a LOT (guy friends btw not girls)
then October 4th he broke up with me from text. A day be for my bday and a a couple weeks after my spinal infusion surgery.
After this j found out my friend was a snake talking about me behind my back. It was so much drama safe to say there was a lot of texting her threatening etc.
now in December I feel horrible my life seems so bad to me j hate it so much. I want a bf so bad now I want to go on dates and have someone who actually loves and cares for me for who I am.
i want to cry so much locked up in my bedroom. And other things I rather not get into right now.
(im new to this app sorry I don’t know how exactly this works)
@willingChestnut7138 It seems like one bad thing happened after another. I'm sorry. It must be painful right now. Here's my 'rebuilding what seems to be a horrible life right now' plan for you:
1. Cry. Allow yourself to mourn the loss of these relationships. If you can vent these feelings creatively, do that too. Journal.
2. It's time to reframe and move on. If the world seems broken, find small bits of solace. Tell me: what are 3 things that are not horrible that have happened to you today or yesterday. It can be as simple as you've accomplished writing a post on the website or you went outside and saw some birds or a person made you feel slightly not bad.
3. Reframe yourself. You didn't deserve to be betrayed or abandoned and you are also not some broken victim. Don't focus on your weaknesses. What are your strengths? If you can't think of any, ask someone you trust to help you. Come up with at least 1. Then, capitalize on it in order to move forward. Like: I am a deep thinker (my friends and family agrees) so instead of sleeping all day or blinding myself with mindless media consumption like I want to do, I've made a schedule to do a little philosophy reading, some time to research ideas I come up with, some time for poetry, and some time to help others on websites like this and then I realize I don't hate myself and my life as much as I did before.
4. REACH OUT. The real key is to strengthen the connections you already have and to make new ones, or you aren't getting anywhere with your life. I'm using this website to reach out and help others and I'm making sure to keep in contact with people I trust. Additionally, I'm trying to branch out and maybe join a book group and keep in closer contact with more distant relatives. You've got to try to reach out every day in one way or another.
