Holidays and other stressors
TW
I sobbed into my pillow today when I realized my dog is getting old. He’s so important to me and I can’t imagine losing him. I’m also heartbroken over the loss of a father figure…he passed a year ago from yesterday. He never got to see me grow into a successful person or someone he’d be proud of. He never got to see me get sober and overcome all of my heartbreaks and childhood trauma. I’m so sad that I couldn’t make my relationship work. Breakups are so painful but especially more so when you know that you never would have walked away from them. I feel like I disappoint everyone who cares about me. Christmas is supposed to be such a happy time but I just want to melt into the walls and erase the memory of me from anyone who feels negatively about me or anyone I’ve hurt. Including me. I’m just so sad. I know I’ll be okay but right now, I’m not. And I don’t know how to feel like I’m not irreparably broken.
@spicyavocado3788 I'm truly sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult time. It sounds like you're carrying a heavy emotional burden, and it's completely okay to feel the way you do. Grieving the aging of a beloved pet, the loss of a father figure, and the challenges in personal relationships can be incredibly overwhelming.
It's important to acknowledge the progress you've made, including overcoming heartbreaks, childhood trauma, and achieving sobriety. These are significant accomplishments that reflect your resilience. It's understandable to feel a sense of disappointment, but please remember that healing is a process, and it's okay not to have everything figured out.
Your feelings are valid, and it's okay to express them. Christmas can indeed be a challenging time, especially when faced with such complex emotions. If possible, consider reaching out to friends, family, listeners, or a mental health professional for support. You don't have to navigate through these feelings alone, and there are people who care about you and want to help.
You are not irreparably broken. Healing takes time, and it's a journey that involves both ups and downs. Please be kind to yourself during this difficult period. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here for you 💙
