Feeling
I don’t know how I am feeling. I just know that I don’t want to do anything and wish I could hide myself until my death. I don’t have any desire to do anything. I have no drive. Everything seems meaningless. I don’t want to burden anyone, but I feel like the day will come. Only because I know I will not be able to continue with my responsibilities while in this state of mind.
Tripleplay,
I know it's hard to not become jaded, not become numb. You are going through some very tough times, but you are going THROUGH them, not staying there.
There was a time that I believed in being a good guy and helping people with all of my might, all of my energy. Then I was abandoned and worse by many of my closest people in life all at the same time and for no reason, by the people who pretended to be good hearted people then turned around and stabbed my back and tried to ruin my life. Like you said, life felt meaningless after that. So I drifted, never did anything bad but I just gave up trying to help or trying to love.
But eventually I just changed my mind. I'm not going to let anybody change who I am. I know that people will sometimes or maybe often treat me like s**t. But I'm going to fight through that. If the world sucks then its up to me to make it better. If the world is full of disloyal, mean-spirited people, I'm going to do my best to be loyal, to have a good heart anyway.
What you do DOES have meaning, DOES make a difference. Picture yourself fighting through a hurricane.
@Tripleplay
Dear Triple, Been awhile I have so many questions such as how are you doing? I really hope you are doing better and keeping your head up. Little update on me I failed half my exams and got reclassifed but this year I am really focusing on my school. I went to the hospital this summer and got put in an outpatient program for 2 weeks it was so boring, I met really great people though. Im becoming a better person super slowly tho.
@Selfloveisimportant
Hey, thank you for the update. I am doing better and trying to stay as positive as I can. It is good that you are focusing on school. Your efforts and hard work will pay off in the end. Why were you in the hospital? 🥺 and have you healed?
@Tripleplay
Tw.......... Suicide
Well I tried to well yk unalive me. Im glad your trying to stay positive thts always important
@Selfloveisimportant
That's awful. I am glad you failed. Too many people care about you and would have their hearts ripped out if you were no longer here with us. I am sorry that you felt so alone and hopeless to do that to yourself. But I can't say I haven't tried myself.
What triggered it?
Hi Tripleplay,
You responded to a post I made a while ago. I completely understand. Today I spent all day in my bedroom, and I haven’t talked to anyone properly in a month. It’s so isolating, I get it. It feels like everyone’s on a different wavelength to me, but I promise you aren’t alone.
Sometimes when there’s no one in your life to turn to, or you don’t want to be a burden, it becomes harder and harder to deal with the loneliness. And even if it’s online, I hope that this bit of community helps. I really do.
@123asha
Hey,
Yes, I remember you well. Thank you very much for taking the time to send me encouraging words. That is very thoughtful you. I know it is not always easy to do even the simple things though you have the heart to do so. So, I am grateful.
The people on here is as genuine as it gets when it comes to online support for mental health troubles. I know because I have tried almost every app and/or website to desperately find an escape from my inner agony. Please continue to write to me when you need it most. I am always present even though I sometimes go mute. When I unmute myself, I always respond.
@Tripleplay
I’m really sorry you’re feeling this way. It sounds incredibly tough, and it’s understandable to feel overwhelmed and disconnected when you’re in such a state. Sometimes, when everything seems meaningless and the drive is gone, it can be helpful to focus on small, manageable steps, even if it’s just reaching out to someone who can offer a listening ear or a bit of support.
It’s important to be kind to yourself and acknowledge that it’s okay to need a break. You don’t have to carry this alone or push through when it feels impossible. Even taking small moments to care for yourself, like finding a quiet space or doing something that feels comforting, can be a way to begin easing the burden.
Remember that it’s okay to ask for help and share what you’re going through. Your feelings are valid, and reaching out for support doesn’t make you a burden—it’s a sign of strength and a step towards finding relief. You matter, and your well-being is important. If you can, try to find someone you trust to talk to or explore resources that might provide some support. Your needs are important, and taking small steps towards addressing them can make a difference.
Take care.
Jesus loves you remember