Emptiness
I am ao tired of pretending like am okay all the time. I have pushed away too many people bcz I can't seen to be able to keep in contact and have normal conversations like I used to. All my life I have been pretending to fir in, make friends, enjoy life, have relationships but nothing works. Nothing makes me happy and I know that I can't really explain this feeling to anyone. It's like am sinking deeper into the emptiness more and more. Some days I am better bcz the distractions work other days I am trying my best to hide my feelings and when am alone I feel like I need it to stop, need everything to go away. I have been wasting away everything, I keep disappointing everyone and I don't know how to help myself either. I sometimes wish I cud just sleep and never wake up - sounds so cliched but idk what else to say
@fadinaway It takes courage to open up about feeling so lost and empty inside. Pretending to be okay all the time take a heavy toll on mental health. What do you think might happen if you allowed yourself to truly feel and express these emotions?
@fadinaway
It sounds like you’re carrying a tremendous weight, and I want you to know that what you’re feeling is deeply valid and understandable. It can be incredibly exhausting and isolating to constantly pretend that everything is okay while feeling the opposite inside. It’s as if you’re caught in a cycle of trying to fit in and maintain connections, while simultaneously feeling increasingly detached and empty.
The effort to mask your true emotions and put on a brave face can leave you feeling drained and alone. It’s like you’re trying to hold everything together, but inside, you’re sinking deeper into a sense of emptiness. This internal conflict can make everything seem even more challenging.
The fleeting relief you get from distractions is a testament to your resilience, but it’s clear that these temporary solutions don’t address the root of your distress. It’s completely natural to wish for an escape when you’re overwhelmed, and these thoughts, even if they seem cliched, are genuine reflections of how much pain you’re in.
It’s also painful to feel like you’re disappointing others. The pressure of maintaining appearances while feeling disconnected can make you question your value and contribute to feelings of inadequacy. It’s important to remind yourself that your worth isn’t tied to your ability to meet others’ expectations, especially when you’re struggling.
Understanding these feelings can be a first step toward addressing them. It might help to explore what’s underlying these emotions and to acknowledge them without judgment. Being kind to yourself and allowing yourself to feel and express what’s going on inside can be a way to start healing.
Consider small, gentle actions that might bring some relief or joy, even if just for a moment. This could be anything from engaging in a hobby you enjoy, spending time in nature, or reaching out to someone you trust in a small way. These steps don’t have to be grand; even small acts of self-compassion can be significant.
You don’t have to go through this alone, and reaching out to trusted friends or family members can offer support. Remember that your feelings are valid and that you’re deserving of empathy and understanding. It’s okay to take things one day at a time and to be patient with yourself as you navigate through this challenging period.
You are valued and worthy, even when it feels otherwise. Taking care of yourself, acknowledging your pain, and allowing yourself to seek out moments of comfort and connection can be important steps in finding your way through this.