Psychosis and gaslighting

@MostlyQuiet

I'm sorry to hear that you've been through such a difficult experience. Gaslighting can be a very damaging form of abuse, especially when combined with psychosis. It's understandable that you feel unsure of your memories and are struggling to trust yourself.

It's important to know that recovery from this type of trauma is possible. Many people have come through the other side and learned to trust themselves again. Have you considered reaching out to a therapist or support group? They can provide a safe space for you to talk about your experiences and help you develop coping mechanisms.

Remember that you are not alone, and there are people who can help you through this. It takes time and effort, but healing is possible.

Hey,

When I had a psicosis episode, a lot of people around me actively gaslit me and told me that what I was feeling/seeing wasn't there or real or true. This got particularly bad when I was taken to a hospital against my will, where the nurses would actively lie to me about what was going on, the meds they were giving me, or whatever was going to happen next. I can tell you that it's extremely damaging and traumatic, and it is not your fault.

What helped me was reaching out to people who were there during the episode after I was more lucid to ask about why I was saying the things I said, and ask why they lied to me. I can't say that I'm fully healed from the event (it's been about 10 months) but knowing what happened has helped in that I know I wasn't making things up - I was just thinking about things differently.

Other than that, retelling the event has helped a lot in creating a coherent storyline for myself and knowing that my experience is valid. It might feel like you're repeating yourself too much, but it's part of understanding a traumatic event.

So I've never been gaslighted to my knowledge, but for the longest time I was convinced that I was. You see I thought my parents were moving objects around in my house and placing them in special ways to send messages to me. Like unscrewing the caps of wine bottles to tell me they're mad at me for drinking or putting a toothbrush on the counter to tell me I'm not brushing my teeth enough or putting chicken in the tuna salad to tell me I'm eating too much tuna salad and not enough chicken salad, I could go on and on. I was so convinced that they were doing this and I was talking about it to my therapist. She told me to ask them if they were doing it so I did thinking I was gonna make them buckle, but they insisted they weren't doing it and that it sounded insane. I kept bringing it up every time I thought it happened and even had them come with me to therapy to try to get my therapist to make them admit they were doing it but they insisted they weren't and my therapist was taking their side. I started crying and crying and crying saying I know what I saw I know what I saw. I was so convinced that they were gaslighting me and trying to make me seem crazy by doing this kind of crazy thing to me but through many months of therapy and contemplation I finally admitted to myself that I was being delusional. I know that's not what was going on with you guys, but it's the closest experience I have to being gaslighted and it really stuck with me for some reason.

@MostlyQuiet

Hey, I'm not too sure about that one, the psychosis and gaslighting going together like that. However, I feel like the psychiatrist that gave me the prognosis for psychosis was kind of gaslighting me. 

I can maybe think of a few gaslighting situations during my psychosis. I still believe I'm going through it now, along with multiple diagnoses. But yeah, I think that's the end result of me not being willing to go into IOP, and now needing to find better resolutions that will work for me, so incorporating all of these diagnoses and prognosis/symptoms of psychosis will better help me out in the end.