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Feeling like I've failed

ApricotKitten September 10th, 2021

I see so many around me succeeding and doing great.

At 30 I am working 2 jobs to pay off my debt and pay my rent, and on a strict budget to ensure I meet my goals. I want to start saving for a house deposit one day. It just feels like I'll never get there.


I have had to give up streaming and going to the gym because of my anxiety, it's gotten so bad and I'm feeling worse because of how many others are succeeding and doing well for themselves. I have been crying often. I just can't get out of this rut and don't even want to leave the house anymore. My motivation for the things I used to enjoy is at 0 and I don't know how to get me back again.

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barncat September 10th, 2021

@ApricotKitten- sorry to hear you are feeling so low. Sounds like more than anxiety- hints of depression coming through your post. Hope you can find someone to support you through this period in your life. It is OK to feel this way- and not everyone who appears to be successful is beneath the surface. Take care.

1 reply
ApricotKitten OP September 10th, 2021

Yeah I have depression too, it's like a cycle really. The anxiety starts, the depression follows. 😅

I'm going to see about contacting a doctor next week but fear I will just be placed on more medication again when i really just want someone to listen

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Hannaa0124 September 10th, 2021

@ApricotKitten
I'm sorry for you I've been feeling down too as a child i lost my father there's not much people to help me mentally and physically i hope you feel better and get over your problems

1 reply
ApricotKitten OP September 10th, 2021

I'm sorry to hear this, you're so strong to have gotten this far ❤️ hang in there and sending good vibes your way

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blueSugar2316 September 11th, 2021

Thank you for sharing! I’m right there with you - I’m 32 and trying to save for a house as well. It seems like a far away dream but I’m trying - saving every month and trying to eat out less. I compare myself to others my age sometimes and start to feel behind. But I think we’re all trying our best and we’re all running our own race.