Anxious when alone
I suffer from anxiety which I have really managed over the past few months to the point of not feeling any anxiety. My relationship broke down a month ago and since I experience general anxiety around going out and socialising. I do not feel safe at all knowing that I cannot call my ex partner if anything happens and weirdly I feel like a child as if I needed someone to somehow watch over me... i dont know if anyone else experienced anything like this. Overall I do ‘adult ‘ things in life such as I have a promising job, I drive, Im looking to buy a house... but I still feel like a child in a sense that I need someone to watch out for me otherwise I feel insecure and anxious....
I can see where you're coming from. I don't like to be alone either sometimes, even if it's just at my apartment late at night. I feel anxious occasionally because of the windows that we have in our living room. I think that having someone around can be a form of comfort that provides a sense of safety!
@gloriousSunrise61 exactly. Hopefully I will not be in this situation for long Im moving back in with my parents to allow me to finish saving up for a house of my own . The thing is when I do end up getting in I think I may have to sublet it . Ive never actually lived alone before thats the bottom line
I totally understand how you feel. Being on your own is absolutely terrifying and I wish every day I was braver, as I'm sure you do, too. The only way I can ever get through it is by trying to act tough and look intimidating and strong on the outside in the hopes that the phrase "fake it 'til you make it" will apply. I guess the only thing I can think of is to maybe try to combat the loneliness by going out with friends, double dating with a friend if you decide to start looking for a new significant other so you have someone familiar to fall back on if you feel panicky or like the date isn't going well, and if you're having trouble living alone then maybe look into a pet if you haven't already? Even if it's something as simple as a goldfish, just so long as you have some other living being there with you so that you don't feel so alone. And if a pet isn't possible, I find it always helps me to run a TV show in the background while I'm doing stuff, something light like a sitcom, just so it doesn't feel so lonely and still. As for going out into the world on your own, I try to prepare myself as best as possible and make sure I have the necessary items on hand for if something happens, like pepper spray for if someone tries to mug me and ibuprofen for if I feel sick and can't get home (since I'm dependent on public transportation to get places which isn't always the most convenient), as well as some comforting items like a soft, plush keychain of Stitch on my backpack that I sometimes squeeze when I have a panic attack or will rub his ears between my fingers. Or sometimes I'll open and close this locket I always wear around my neck, or play with the zipper on my boots. Just something comforting to distract me when times get tough and I'm stuck.
@myaekingheart thanks thats very helpful. I am usually fine ones Im around people and get to places but its just getting there that is the issue a lot of the time . As if I was feeling anxious about getting to places as if I was not supposed to be going there. I am trying to meet up with friends as much as I can and it is helping my confidence already. Definitely going to consider pepper spray such a good idea!
@wonderingsoul95 I'm glad you've been feeling better! I've never had to use my pepper spray but it always makes me feel safer just knowing have it in on hand just in case. Sometimes looking up self defense methods, like videos on youtube about the best ways to handle being apprehended by a stranger, can help to ease your worries, too, by helping you feel more prepared about whatever could happen even if you may never have to use that information. Sometimes just knowing that you know what to do in a situation like that can help ease your worries a bit :)
yeah i can relate to not wanting to be alone, especially when i am having a panic attack but i usually am alone when that happens or im at work and would rather hide it if i can. anxiety can make you feel out of control and create a fear of uncertainty so it makes you want someone to be there to comfort you and help you not focus on your fears so much. at least that is the way it is for me. if you know someone who you trust and who understand what you are going through it can be helpful to contact them whenever you feel particularly anxious. at least thats what helps me, its the worst feeling ever to suffer from anxiety and feel like you are alone.